


It was never easy.

by PrettyDeadBoy



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alexandria Safe-Zone, Background Relationships, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Frotting, Grady Memorial Hospital, Hershel's Farm, M/M, Party-Hardy, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Prison (Walking Dead), Rimming, Sex, Terminus (The Walking Dead), Trust Issues, Woodbury (Walking Dead)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-16 15:23:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 67,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9277883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrettyDeadBoy/pseuds/PrettyDeadBoy
Summary: DARK FIC!Multiple trigger warnings.Ryan's life hadn't been easy, and after the Dead started walking, it certenly didn't get better.That was until he met a group that took him in as family.





	1. Wounded

_ It's not that far... You can make it... _

That were the only words that went through Ryan's head. 

_ Come on… _

With slow steps, he walked towards the farm, clutching his left hand at his right side. His long, blond hair was partially colored red of blood and guts of the Dead. The baseball bat he had was now covered in blood, and no matter how many times Ryan cleaned it, some bloodstains didn’t come off. Besides the beloved bat, Ryan carried an empty gun, a Glock 19, which he had fired at the Dead when he was desperate, now out of bullets. 

 

Even though it was almost nightfall, there was sign of life in the house, not the Dead walking around. Ryan had closely observed the farm while he was resting against the barn. Sometimes he spotted some humans outside, doing some work, but they never saw him, thanks to being dressed in all black. While being covered, he strapped the bat to his backpack so he wouldn’t lose it, and so he wouldn’t look like a big threat. 

While Ryan faced the porch, he hesitated for a second. 

_ What if they are bad people, only wanting to hurt me more? That would be fucked up… _

Putting these thoughts away, Ryan walked up to the door. He started to feel dizzy, and his vision started to blur a bit. Must have been the bloodloss of the wound in his side. He had to hold on the door when he knocked on it, otherwise he would have fallen. 

“Help…” Ryan coughed. “Please help…”

The door opened, and Ryan saw a tough guy standing in the opening. 

“What do ya want?” The guy’s spoke with a Southern accent.

“Please…” Ryan’s vision became dark. “Help…”

Ryan had to grab his head, hoping the spinning would stop, but it didn’t. His legs became weak, and body went heavy. With a tud, Ryan ended on the floor, unconscious. 

  
  


“Pass me the IV drip, this guy is dehydrated!” Ryan heard a male voice say, and several footsteps. 

He tried to open his eyes, but his eyelids were too heavy. Ryan felt a sharp pain on his right hand, which faded away quickly. 

“Luckily his veins are easy to find…” A female voice this time. 

A cold fluid suddenly appeared in Ryan’s arm. He moved his fingers at the feeling, wanted to get rid of it. 

“He is waking up?” The female voice again.

“Yes. That’s a good thing.” The male voice spoke again. “We do need to stitch his wound.”

That last sounded blurry to Ryan, as he drifted away again.

 

Eyes shot open, and a deep breath was taken. Ryan had woken up from a nightmare. He shot upright, but got back on his back when he felt his side. The wound didn’t feel as burning anymore, which was good. 

“He is awake, dad!” The female voice from before rang through Ryan’s ears, making him look at the direction it came from. A young woman, with brown ear length hair, stood in the doorway with big eyes.

An older man appeared behind her. “Thank you, Maggie. I’ll take it from here.”

The woman, Maggie, made way for the older man by stepping out of view. The older man had white hair, and was dressed decently for the time being. 

“My name is Hershel Greene.” The man said, while sitting on the end of the bed Ryan was in. “My daughter Maggie, who you saw earlier, and I treated your wound, she cleaned you up. You were also dehydrated, that’s why you have the IV drip.”

When Ryan heard of the IV drip, he shot into panic, and ripped it out of his arm.

“Well,” Hershel said. “No IV drip then. But tell me at least your name.”

Ryan had to take a few deep breaths. “Ryan.”

“Just Ryan?” Hershel asked further.

Ryan looked away, not wanting to let these strangers know much about him.

“You were passed out for two days, Ryan.” Hershel said, and stood up to clean up the dripping IV. “Are you hungry?”

Ryan didn’t answer, and instead tried sitting against the headboard of the bed. He lifted his shirt, and saw the wound on the right side of his stomach and hip, all stitched up nicely. 

“Where is my bag?” 

Hershel pointed to the far corner of the room. “It’s over there.”

“Is all of my stuff still in it?” Ryan glared. 

“We didn’t touch it besides getting it off you.” Hershel sounded honest. 

Ryan was still on his guard, in case these people might try something on him. “I gotta go now…”

“You won’t go anywhere.” Hershel said, getting Ryan's attention even more. “You can barely sit by yourself.”

Hershel had a point there, and Ryan knew it. 

“But, once you’re good to go, you have to go.” Hershel was stern.

“Deal.” Ryan said. 

Hershel stood at the end of the bed. “Well, are you hungry or not? The ladies are making some food. It’s almost dinner time already.”

Ryan only nodded. 

“Are you good to walk? You need to come and eat with us.” Hershel reached out for Ryan, who visibly flinched. “Boy, I’m not gonna hurt you.”

“Don’t call me “boy”!” Ryan almost shouted. “Don’t touch me!”

The commotion had raised attention from other people in the house, causing the daughter, Maggie, to run into the room. “Dad?”

“I got it, Maggie.” Hershel said, and turned his attention back to Ryan. “We get it, you are scared, but I promise we won’t do anything bad to you.”

It took a while before Ryan calmed down, and slowly got up. He did need support of the wall while he walked.

“Don’t.” Ryan glared to Maggie, who wanted to support him. 

Maggie, who looked like she got slapped across the face, nodded, and stood back. Before Ryan went to the dinner room, he grabbed his gun and tugged into his jeans. 

“No guns on my farm.” Hershel said, and held his hand up. “Put it back in your bag, or give it to me.”

Ryan glared, but the stranger had helped him. He tossed the gun back in the bag, and limped to the door.

 

Dinner was actually quite nice. Hershel introduced Ryan to everyone there, getting all kinds of greetings thrown at him. Ryan glared at all of them, but when it was quiet again, his face grew softer. Looking at all the present people, he noticed one was missing. 

“Where is he?” Ryan asked after he had taken a few bites from his plate. “The guy who opened the door.”

“You mean Daryl? Daryl is out in his tent, he didn’t feel like joining.” The woman called Carol said. 

Ryan remained quiet, and took a sip from his glass of water. 

“Thank you for the food.” He muttered, and stood up, limping to the door. He needed to see the guy, Daryl, one more time before he would go. 

 

“What do ya want?” The voice with the Southern accent spoke as soon as Ryan came close to the tent. 

“You’re Daryl, right?” Ryan spoke. Daryl was laying with his back to Ryan.

“Yeah, Daryl Dixon is the name. Pleased to meetcha.” Daryl spoke sarcastically. 

“Thanks.” Ryan said. 

“Don’t mention it.” Daryl didn’t care at all. 

Silence.

“Watcha name?” Daryl suddenly asked, just as Ryan turned around to limp back to the farm.

“Ryan.”

“Last name?”

Ryan didn’t answer.

“Did you lose your tongue?! I asked for your last name!” Daryl flared up, and suddenly stood right in front of Ryan, slightly bowing so they were on same eye level. Daryl was definitely taller and stronger than Ryan, but Ryan didn’t back off. 

“None of your business.” Ryan coldly said, and continued getting back to the farm.

“Hey!” Daryl shouted. “I asked a damn question, you’re not going to ignore me!” Daryl made it over to Ryan in no time, and grabbed him by the arms.

“Don’t fucking touch me!” Ryan screamed, shaking angrily. “Let go!”

_ This isn’t good…  _ Ryan’s thoughts shot through his head.  _ He is bad.  _

“Calm the fuck down, boy!” Daryl growled.

“Don’t you dare call me “boy”!” Ryan made fists of his hands, trying to get loose in panic. “Let me go, son of a bitch!”

“You little shit” Daryl pushed Ryan away, raising his fist to hit him, but got stopped by Rick. 

“Daryl, stop.”

“He started it!”

“Daryl.” Rick almost growled. 

“Fine.” Daryl kept looking at Ryan, not breaking eye contact, and shook his arm loose from Rick's grip. “You still owe me!” Daryl pointed at Ryan, and walked off to his tent.

Ryan, who was on the ground because Daryl pushed him quite hard, got up with effort. The pain in his side and hip wasn’t gone yet. 

“You alright?” Rick asked. 

“Yeah.” Ryan walked slowly past Rick, almost falling over. 

“Let me help.” Rick said. 

“No.” Ryan walked away, limping as little as he could.

  
  
  


“You remind me of Daryl.” Carl, the young boy said the next day. “You just don’t look like him, or speak in an accent like him.” It was the next morning since the incident with Daryl.

Rick, his father, was in the same room, observing. He knew Carl was drawn to Ryan, but he didn’t trust Ryan enough to leave his son with him.

“Then why do I remind you of him?” Ryan asked, just sitting on a chair, looking coldly at the boy. 

“Your ways of doing. You look pretty tough, you know?”

“Yeah… Guess you’re right.”

“Are you Daryl’s brother? Just like Merle?”

“No.”

“You would fit in just right.”

“Daryl has a brother, huh?” Ryan just asked, trying to get the boy’s attention to something different than Ryan.

“Yeah, Merle was quite an asshole.” 

“Language, Carl!” Rick said from the other side of the room.

“I mean, Merle was quite not-so-friendly.” Carl corrected himself. “Dad left him handcuffed on a rooftop in Atlanta.”

“Only because he was not-so-friendly?” Ryan questioned, and also questioned what kind of person Rick was.

“No, Merle was a danger to himself and others.” Carl continued. “Dad and others went back for him, but he wasn’t there.”

“Did he die?” 

“No, he cut his hand off and made it off the rooftop.” Carl showed a sad smile. “He might or might not be alive right now.”

Ryan sighed. “Guess we’ll never know,”

“He’s alive. I just know it.” Daryl stood in the doorway.

“Daryl!” Carl said, actually quite surprised. 

“Hey there, little man.” Daryl said to Carl, and glared at Ryan.

“Did he speak?” Rick asked Daryl.

“He spoke a whole damn lot.” Daryl answered, and sat next to Rick. “About his group. A group of 30 people. Told me his people raped two girls, their father watching. Said he isn’t like that.”

Once Ryan heard the story about rape, he fled the room. He did not want to hear this.

“Ryan!” Carl walked after him. “Ryan, wait up!”

“Leave me alone!” He hissed, and grunted at the pain of his wound when he turned around. 

“Is it about what Daryl said?” Carl quickly said, making Ryan stop abruptly.

“No.”

“Then what?” Carl kept going.

“Just leave me alone.” Ryan continued walking.

 

Ryan sat against a tree, outside. Hershel wanted him to stay inside, due to the chance of an infection, but Ryan didn’t listen. 

He just needed time, to think, and to let thoughts go.

That last didn’t go as planned though.

“Hey,” A voice from behind sounded. “Mind if I joined ya?’

Daryl.

“Whatever…” Ryan did keep his guard up.

As soon as Daryl sat down, keeping his distance, Ryan shifted. If Daryl tried something, he would be able to get up quicker. 

“Why did ya walk away like that?” Daryl asked after a silence.

Ryan didn’t answer.

After another silence, Daryl spoke again.

“What are your plans?”

“Once I’m healed, I’ll be gone again. Gosh, I don’t even remember why I wanted help.” Ryan said, and the last part was muttered.

“Ya were having a raging fever, ya were dehydrated and an open wound.” Daryl filled in.

“Guess that’s the cause of my weird behavior… Talking to strangers...”

“Ya a part of a group?” Daryl asked with a hint of interest in his voice.

“No.” Ryan said. 

“Since the beginning?”

A short silence fell. “... No. I used to be in a group for a while.” Ryan mentally hit himself for opening up way too much.

Shivers ran down his spine, while Daryl kept asking questions.

“Just drop it.” Ryan said in a final defense. Daryl decided not to ask further anymore, and sat in silence next to Ryan against the tree.

“I’m sorry ‘bout yesterday.” Daryl said. “Was a lil’... irritated...”

As an answer, Ryan hummed.

While the two of them just stayed silent, Ryan heard footsteps coming their way. Getting up on his feet quickly, he took a defensive stance. “Don’t come closer!” Ryan had reached to his belt, where he kept his gun usually, finding nothing.

“Ryan, it’s time to get your bandages refreshed.” Maggie stood in front of him, holding her hands in the air. “Hershel is waiting inside. Daryl, Rick wants to see you.”

The focus of Ryan swifted between Maggie and Daryl. After Daryl had walked away, towards the farm, Ryan walked after Maggie.

He knew she was scared of him, just as some others of the group, but he didn’t take advantage of it. Since Ryan was intimidated by Rick, Hershel, Daryl and some others, he didn’t dare to do anything to them, that would just mean the end of him.

“He opened up to you. How’d you do that?” Maggie suddenly said, pulling Ryan out of his thoughts, but didn’t answer.

“Daryl never talks a lot.” Maggie told Ryan, trying to relieve some tension. “But he can tell the difference between a good man, and a bad man. If he opens up to you, we can trust you.”

“Hmpf.” Ryan stepped onto the porch, meeted by Daryl, who held the door open for both Maggie and Ryan. 

Automatically, Ryan walked to the room which was assigned for him. 

“Ryan, please remove your shirt, and lower your pants a little so I can check your wound.” Hershel spoke.

Ryan’s tension spiked at the moment, but decided to listen to the older man. Actually trembling he removed his shirt, and lowered his pants by an inch.

“Thank you. Since I know you don’t like to be touched, could you remove the bandages?” Hershel had observed Ryan his behavior, and had made notes.

Carefully, Ryan peeled the bandages off, and cursed silently when a piece of his closed wound got with it, causing it to bleed again. 

“Looks like we underestimated the wound.” Hershel spoke as he got some rubber gloves on his hands. “Lay down on the bed. Don’t get scared, I’m going to clean the wound for you.”

Hershel grabbed a clean towel, and sprayed a clear liquid on it. As Ryan laid down, he noticed it wasn’t water.

Hissing in pain, he grabbed the pillow, so he wouldn’t hit Hershel. 

“Your wound is infected.” Hershel said as he finished up cleaning the wound. “I know you won’t like it, but the only antibiotics we have, is in this bag.” He held up an IV bag. “If you want to get healed quickly, you will need this.” 

Ryan bit his lip, and looked away. “Do whatever you can…” He muttered.

“Good.” Hershel said, and grabbed a clean needle for the IV, gently took Ryan his right hand, and looked for a vein. But as he did, Ryan started to panic. 

“No!” He swung his hand back. 

“Ryan…” Hershel started.

“No!” Ryan shouted even louder. 

“Glenn, Maggie, I need you here!” Hershel shouted, and the two came running into the room. “Glenn, you need to hold his arm still. Maggie, try to calm him.”

Both did as they were told, Glenn pinning Ryan his right arm down, making Ryan even more panicked, but Maggie gently held his left hand, and wiped his blond hair out of his face. 

“Ryan, look at me. It’s going to be okay.” She started to calm Ryan down by talking to him. 

As Ryan didn’t focus on Glenn and Hershel, Hershel was able to put in the IV without trouble. 

“You did good, Ryan.” Hershel commented, and ordered Glenn to let Ryan go. 

“Dad, he is burning.” Maggie said. “This fever is dangerous.”

“I know. The antibiotics should be doing their job pretty quickly. Over night his fever should go down a bit.”

“He is getting drowsy.” Glenn commented.

Ryan, who had trouble keeping his eyes open, had heard every word, and felt himself relax.

“Last night he didn’t sleep well.” Hershel said. “He needs it so badly right now. Let’s continue talking outside the room, so he can rest.”

Before the three had left the room, Ryan was out.

 

Once Ryan had woken up, he noticed he wasn’t in bed anymore. He was uncomfortable, and his head was spinning. Confused, he tried to get up, but noticed just in time he was in a car. Looking around him, he saw Rick driving the car, Hershel sitting in the passenger seat. Both were talking, but Ryan didn’t catch any words. 

Due to the spinning of his head, Ryan decided to lay down again, watching the IV bag hanging above his head. Apparently they had hung the IV bag on the jacket hook in the car, which Ryan found really smart. 

 

The whole night was blurry for Ryan. He kept slipping in and out of consciousness. After what felt like a decade, the sun had risen, and Rick had driven the car to a highway.

Everyone except Ryan had gotten out of the car. Ryan just stared to the IV bag, feeling as if he was in a thick fog.

“His wound has opened again.” Hershel said when he stepped out of the car. “Over the night his fever got worse too.”

“Like we haven’t gotten it bad already.” Rick said, throwing his hands in the air. 

All Ryan heard were these muffled voices, and pieces of the conversation. He was on the edge of passing out. Ryan didn’t know when he heard the roar of a motorcycle coming closer, but the sound got his attention. When the sound abruptly stopped, Ryan wanted to get up to see what happened, but before he could do anything, the door on the opposite side of Ryan got slammed open. “Ryan! Are ya okay?”

Even though Ryan his vision was blurry, he was able to recognise the voice. Daryl.

Ryan looked up to see Daryl’s face, just before passing out again.

 

“You should have left the stupid bag there! You should have left him there!” A female voice woke Ryan up from his fever-sleep.

“What if it were Carl, Lori? Would you leave him there as dinner for those Walkers?” This could have been Glenn’s voice. 

“Don’t bring Carl into this.” Lori warned. “We don’t even know this guy!”

“Ryan is just hurt, mom.” Carl also entered the conversation. “We have to help him!”

“I think Carl is right.” Rick said. “Besides, he could be a good addition to the group, since we lost Andrea, Dale, Shane.”

“A good addition?” Lori argued. “He has been out for over a day! He hasn’t contributed in anything besides scaring everyone.”

“He was out there. Alone.” Daryl argued. “He used to be in a group.”

“And why isn’t he in that group anymore, huh?” Lori spat. “Shane was sane enough to see he is a threat to us.”

“Not all people are like we are.” Carol spoke up. “He is broken.”

“It was my farm, it was my choice to take him in, and it was my choice to treat him. He stays, and is my responsibility.” Hershel spoke up. 

“It already has been decided.” Rick said. “Ryan stays.”

And with that, it was quiet.

“I’m going to check on him. Daryl, give me back-up.” Hershel spoke.

The door at Ryan his feet opened, showing Hershel reaching for his shirt, while leaning his leg on Ryan his legs. 

“He is awake, hold his arms, Daryl.”

Ryan didn’t like that idea at all, and started struggling to get free, only to be met with two strong arms which held his arms down. 

Daryl had appeared above Ryan’s head, and restrained his arms from moving, while Hershel was able to keep his legs from moving, and lifted his shirt up. Ryan wanted to scream, but his throat didn’t work with him, only leaving huffs and puffs out. 

“I don’t see any fresh blood on the bandages.” Hershel said, putting Ryan’s shirt back in place, and backed up out of the car. “How is his temperature?” 

Ryan his arms got released too, relieving Ryan, until he felt a cold hand on his forehead.

“Still burnin’ my hand.” Daryl answered, and wiped his hand off. “Sweatin’ like an otter too.”

Daryl carefully closed the door again, and appeared at Hershel’s side. 

“It’s not getting better yet.” Hershel said. “But luckily no fresh blood on the bandages. If he is lucky he’ll be better in a few days.”

 

The “few” days passed slowly, at least for Ryan. The group moved from house to house after the vehicles ran out of fuel. When that happened, Ryan was in no condition to move around. He was at least grateful the group hadn’t forgotten to take his stuff with them. His fever got a little less, but it was far from gone. When Rick announced the news they had to move by foot, Lori began her little tantrum again about leaving Ryan behind. Rick just ignored her, and thought about options to move Ryan with them.

“I can carry ‘m?” Daryl spoke. “If he allows me, at least.” Knowing the struggle Ryan put up when he got touched by anyone.

Ryan crawled up from the backseat of the car he was in, and looked outside. He saw the group sitting in a circle, discussing what further.

“That would be the best option.” Hershel said. “He reacts better to Daryl than to anyone else.”

“It’s settled then.” Rick said. “Let’s get him and his stuff, we’ll move to the closest house.”


	2. Safely behind bars

It was approximately eight months after the fall of the farm, and the group had been moving house to house ever since the cars had ran out of fuel. Daryl had been giving Ryan piggy-back rides until Ryan was able to walk by himself. Which almost took a week. The wound Ryan had, hadn’t healed properly, leaving a nasty scar. 

Lori her belly got big, as she was pregnant by either Shane or Rick, Hershel actually got a beard and his hair became longer, and of course Daryl’s hair got longer. Ryan also has longer hair now, and a little fuzz on his chin. Glenn didn’t have facial hair at all, given his genes. 

Ryan didn’t speak much, everyone knew this by now. He rarely spoke on his own initiative, usually only talking when someone asked something. Except for Daryl. Ryan sometimes spoke to Daryl on his own initiative, but it was rare. For the group it was clear Ryan had severe trust issues, only trusting Daryl the most, and that took at least four months.  

Sometimes Ryan allowed Daryl, Hershel or Carl to touch him, only for necessary things. When others tried to touch him, Ryan reacted as bad as eight months back. After a while, most of the group just gave up on touching Ryan. 

Going house to house, the group survived, but they stayed in the same area. The group did notice quite quickly after Ryan had healed, and when they were in danger, Ryan grew into an enormous psychopath, killing lots of walkers with his baseball bat and even his bare fists. Rick was officially the leader now, Hershel and Daryl at his right hand. Once in awhile they would discuss several options to go, but they didn’t come to the right solutions.

Until a while back. 

The group came across a prison, filled with Walkers, and they managed to clear a big part. The first night they only had the outside, but it was secure.  

Ryan was cold, so stayed close to the little campfire they managed to set up, and ate some food. Daryl was on top of a car at the entrance, keeping the watch. 

Ryan gathered some food for Daryl, and decided to bring it. 

“I got some food for you.” Ryan said, and put the food right before Daryl’s feet before climbing on the car too. “It’s not a lot but otherwise you wouldn’t eat at all…”

Daryl grinned. “Talkin’ much today, huh?”

Ryan didn’t give an answer.

“Thanx for the food anyway.” Daryl said, and ate some. “Ya like it here?”

Ryan looked at Daryl. “It’s something.”

“Yeah.” Daryl looked back at Ryan. “It’s somethin’.”

Silence, only the muffled sounds of the group around the campfire, and the sound of Daryl eating. 

“Do you think we are able to clear the inside?” Ryan suddenly asked. “You know, to settle things. Get a blanket maybe.”

Daryl, fascinated by the sudden question. “Yeah. Tomorrow we start. Ya helpin’?”

“Yeah.”

“Cool. Ya can show me the skills I learned ya.” Daryl smirked lightly, remembering the time he trained Ryan with a knife, and sometimes let him shoot with his crossbow. The crossbow had left Ryan black eyes, but eventually he got better in handling the thing. The knife was scaring to Ryan, but even though his fears, Ryan started to master the knife slowly. 

Before Ryan met the group, he had a gun and baseball bat only, but once he was out of ammo, he had lots of trouble surviving. Ryan barely used the baseball bat though, he was visibly upset it had been stained.

“Y’know, let’s make a deal. We team up together tomorrow, who gets most kills wins, okay?”

Hesitantly, Ryan nodded. “Y-yeah.”

“If ya win, ya get to keep my knife.” 

Daryl had promised the knife to Ryan once he had mastered the weapon. Until now, Ryan had gotten better, but made small mistakes which could cost him his life. 

“Deal.” Ryan said. 

After at least ten minutes of silence, Ryan actually broke the ice.

“What did you do before all this?”

Daryl was surprised Ryan spoke so much, and actually asked questions. “Didn’t do anythin’. Hangin’ a’round with Merle.” Daryl didn’t reveal all of it, as he wasn’t very open himself. “You?”

“I was learning for sports teacher.” Ryan honestly opened up. “Got inspired by an old coach of mine. Got my baseball bat from him. He was… Different.”

Daryl listened carefully. “Different?”

“He helped me in times I needed help, even though it wasn’t his job to.”

“What’d happen?” Daryl wanted to know more about Ryan.

“Got a wound on my ankle. Half of my left lower leg had to be amputated due to a dangerous virus. I got my prosthesis a month before the outbreak ” Ryan spoke, leaving Daryl speechless.

Ryan felt Daryl’s stare, and noticed Daryl opened his mouth to say something.

“Forget what I said.” Ryan said abruptly, feeling vulnerable. He got up, and jumped back down, walking back to the campfire, and laid down, resting his head on his bag.

“Ryan?” Carl’s voice said. “Are you okay?”

Ryan didn’t answer, and turned his back to the group. He had opened up too much to Daryl just now, and didn’t know what to do. 

_ What if he takes advantage?  _

Closing his eyes, Ryan tried to get the thoughts out of his head. 

_ But, if he, and the group wanted to, they would have done it already… Can I really trust them? _

Sighing, Ryan relaxed a bit. 

“I’m fine.” Ryan eventually said, as an answer to Carl. 

The group noticed the behavior, and looked at each other, giving each other silent smiles.  

 

During the night, Daryl hadn’t noticed any movement, from the group or from outside. It was until the very first sunrays started to light the sky he noticed movement.

Looking to the direction of the movement, he saw Ryan. 

Ryan had woken up, like he did every morning at the start of the day, and started stretching his muscles. Usually he only stretched his muscles, but now he started jogging after that. 

Even after Ryan told Daryl about his leg, Daryl didn’t see any weird limping moves from the running guy. The hunter couldn't even figure out where the prosthesis was, due to the fact Ryan still wore his combat boots.

Daryl made a mental note to ask about it once he had the opportunity. 

After a while of running, the sun was out fully, giving the day life. 

Rick had woken up, and started waking up the group.

Today was the day. They would try to take the prison, clearing a good part of the Walkers. 

Daryl had handed the promised knife to Ryan, and they went into formation. Hershel, Carl, Carol, Lori and Beth would stay in the cleared prison garden, closing the gate after the others went in to clear it. They also lured Walkers to the fence, killing them through it. 

The fighters went in, and stayed together as a group, as discussed. As they started to clear the courtyard, they noticed a lot more Walkers were further in. 

Moving to the Walkers, they noticed some had armour on, which made it almost impossible for the group to kill the brain. Maggie however, killed one with armour, by stabbing the guy in the neck. Quickly the group followed, and closed the fence where even more Walkers were. 

After successfully closing the fence, Ryan looked around. There were no threats at that moment, so he could catch his breath for a minute. 

“It looks secure.” Glenn commented after looking around. 

“Not lookin’ from that courtyard over there. And that’s a civilian.” Daryl pointed to the Walker in normal clothes. 

“They could have been overrun by Walkers from outside the prison.” T-Dog said. 

“Well, what if there are walls down? We can’t rebuild this whole prison.” Glenn thought.

“We can’t risk a blind spot.” Rick said. “We have to push in.”

Rick walked to the fence which separated the entrance and the courtyard, and went in, group following on his heel. 

Daryl slid open the door, and Rick took a fighting stance, to be met with nothing but a small hall and a typical prison door, made of only bars. 

Rick opened that door, and went in carefully, closely followed by Daryl and the rest. No Walkers were in that space, what used to be something like a common area, given the look-out tower in the space. 

Pointing in directions, Rick silently told the group to inspect those spots, being met with nothing. 

Ryan went up the watch tower first, followed by Rick. 

In the watch tower was a body, but that bastard had killed himself, by shooting himself in the brain. 

Rick quickly got the keys that still were on the guard. 

He opened the barred door of block C, and the group inspected it carefully. 

They were met with silence, until they got up to the second floor, by using the stairs in the middle. Two inmates were still locked up, and had turned. Before Rick could stab the head of one of the Walkers, Ryan had done it, while Daryl did the other one. 

As soon as Rick gave the sign, Glenn and Maggie got the others and their stuff, while T-Dog, Rick, Daryl and Ryan cleared the block of the bodies. Daryl and Rick dropped the bodies off the platform, where T-Dog was waiting to pull them away. Ryan dragged the already dead bodies away too.

“What do you think?” Rick asked as soon as the others walked in.

“Home sweet home.” Glenn said, probably sarcastic.

Lori entered next, looking around. “It’s secure?”

“This cell block is.” Rick answered. 

“What about the rest of the prison?” Hershel asked, while the others still looked around. 

“First thing in the morning, we’ll try to find the infirmary and the cafeteria.” Rick walked around.

“We sleep in the cells?” Beth asked hesitantly. 

“Found keys on some guard.”

“I ain’t sleeping in no cage. I’ll take the porch.” Daryl walked over to the spot, and dropped his stuff there, and grabbed a mattress from a top bunk, while the others paired up to claim a cell.

Ryan took the cell where Daryl had taken the mattress from, so nobody would pair up with him in a cell. 

He dropped his bag next to the bed, and laid down. Still feeling the knife in his hand, he got up and walked to Daryl, who laid on his own mattress. 

“Here.” Ryan said, holding the knife out. 

Daryl opened one eye, and closed it after. “Keep it. Ya won.”

Ryan didn’t argue, and walked away.

“Hey Ryan.” Daryl said quickly before Ryan disappeared into his cell. “Good job.”

Nodding in acknowledgement, Ryan closed his barred door, and laid down again, facing the wall. 

When he heard someone walking his way, and the squeaking of his barred door, he half expected Carl to come in.

“Don’t.” Ryan said before the barred door was open completely. 

“Hey…” He heard Lori’s voice. “I wanted to thank you for helping us.”

Ryan didn’t answer, still disliking Lori for what she had said about him during those eight months. 

“I was wrong about you. I’m sorry.” She said, closed the door completely, and walked away.

 

As soon as it was dark outside, the prison only receiving light from the bright moon, Ryan took off his prosthetic leg, and made himself comfortable. It had been a long time he had taken it off, and he was actually relieved. The special wrap around the stump had started itching a bit, so Ryan also took that one off, feeling the air against his skin. 

“Whoa!” Ryan suddenly heard, and spun around, seeing Carl looking from outside of the cell. Carl opened the cell door very quickly and got a hold on the prosthetic leg. 

“Drop that!” Ryan hissed, and got up, forgetting about the taken off prosthetic, and almost fell.

“No way man! I’m gonna show it to dad!” Carl was hyped about the newly found out secret, and thought the take-off leg was cool. He took off to his father, and Ryan tried to get after him, jumping on one leg while seeking support in the porch rails. 

Cursing at how slow he was, Ryan tried to get down the stairs to where Carl had run off. “Come back, you little shi-!” 

Ryan had walked past Daryl, who had grabbed the empty trouser leg. “Ryan.”

“Let go.” Ryan hissed. “Carl has my leg.”

Since the others were getting comfortable, not sleeping yet, so they got curious what this was all about. 

“Carl,” Rick spoke. “What are you doing with… A leg?”

“It’s not just a leg!” Carl showed his father. “It’s Ryan’s leg.”

Rick looked up, as he was downstairs, and saw Daryl holding an empty trouser leg, and Ryan clutching against the stair rails. 

“Give it back.” Rick said stern. “I taught you better than this.”

“But dad! It’s cool.”

“Carl. It isn’t. Ryan lost his leg, be grateful you still have yours.”

Carl sighed, and walked up the stairs. “Sorry I took it.” He had his head down and gave the prosthesis back.  

“Don’t do it again.” Ryan said, and strapped the prosthesis lightly around his stump, not caring if his trouser leg was in the way, and walked back to his cell. 

 

The following morning, nobody spoke a word about it. Only glances of pity towards Ryan. 

Ryan was very irritated, causing some of the ladies to keep their distance. Except Carol. She approached Ryan with some food. “Here you go.” She said friendly.

Ryan didn’t even look at her, scooting a little further from her.

“Look. You have a prosthesis, so what? That doesn’t change how we should treat you.” Carol began. “Especially after what you have done for us.”

“Haven’t done anything.” Ryan muttered, glaring at Carol. 

“You helped clearing the courtyard, you took watches, and even helped hunting for food the past months.” She reached out her hand, and wiped some of the long hair behind Ryan his ear, causing him to flinch, watched her, but allowed the touch. “Now eat. I overheard Rick, they are going to explore the prison further, and they expect you to be at your best.”

Ryan nodded, and took a bite from the food Carol had brought him. 

What they didn’t notice was Daryl observing the two. Noticing Ryan opened up little by little was a good sign. Daryl was curious what the guy would be like when he was comfortable around people, and what caused him to be like this. 

Confused at these thoughts about Ryan, he shook his head lightly, and got ready to explore.  

“How did you lose it? That part of your leg?” Carol said straight foreward.

“Infection.” Ryan said between his bites. 

“That sucks…” Carol commented, not sure what to say. “Since when?”

“Month before the outbreak.”

“Ah.”

“Got my prosthesis quickly after it had healed.” Ryan said. “Was happy to walk again. Was difficult though.”

“I can’t imagine how that must have been.” Carol said honestly.

“Pretty weird, actually.” Ryan hadn’t finished the food. “Eat up. I’ve had enough.”

This was the first caring gesture he had showed since he had joined the group. 

He got up, and walked to Rick, who was helping T-Dog in some body armour. Carl tried on a helmet, which was way too big for him, but quickly looked away in shame once Ryan arrived. 

“You don’t need that.” Rick told Carl, and took the helmet. “You’re gonna stay put.”

“You’re kidding?” Carl said.

“We don’t know what’s in there. If something goes wrong, you could be the last man standing.” Rick told his son. “I need you to handle things back here.”

Carl nodded. “Sure.”

“Great.” Rick gave the keys to Carl. “Let’s go.”

Daryl was stocked up with arrows for his crossbow, and besides T-Dog, Glenn, Maggie and Hershel had body armour on too. Rick had offered body armour to Ryan, but it was way too big for him, so it wasn’t practical. 

The group stayed together in the dark corridors, keeping flashlights on to see in the dark. Rick and Daryl in front, followed by T-Dog, Hershel, Glenn and Maggie. Ryan was the one in the far back of the group, giving the group back cover in case they might need it. 

Glenn made arrows on the walls to find their way back, while walking through a Walker-body littered corridor. They turned some corners, all clear, until they came across a corridor full of Walkers. 

“Go back! Go back!” Rick hushed, and Ryan made sure the back route was clear, but got surpassed by the others quite quickly. Now being in the middle of the panicking group, he stayed focussed, and helped the members to stay out of the Walkers’ hands. 

It all happened very quickly, they got ambushed by some Walkers, and had to run into another corridor. Not noticing other Walkers, in an attempt to save their lives, Glenn and Maggie got separated from the group. 

Rick leaded the small group further, but Hershel got distracted by Maggie calling for him. 

He stepped over a Walkers’ corpse, not noticing it was still alive.

“Hershel!” Ryan almost screamed, but the Walker already got his leg, and took a bite out of it. “Shit!”

Rick shot the Walker through the brain, and helped Glenn to get Hershel up. Daryl and Ryan kept off the Walkers that were coming for the gunshot, while the others tried to find a safe place. 

They ended up in a corridor where the doors were closed, secured by a chain. Rick quickly broke the chains with his manchette, and rushed through the door. The others quickly followed. 

“Shut the door! Shut the door!” Rick shouted. T-Dog and Daryl kept the door closed, while Glenn and Rick laid Hershel down. 

Daryl put something through the handles of the door, and assisted Rick, leaving T-Dog guarding the door. Rick quickly removed his belt, and strapped it around Hershel’s leg. 

“There is only one way to keep you alive.” Rick said, and grabbed the axe next to him, dashing it into Hershel’s leg over and over again until he was through. 

The panicking Hershel had passed out during this. 

Slightly panicking, Rick observed Hershel. “He’s bleeding out.”

Daryl, noticing five figures in the back, told Rick to duck, so he did. What Daryl saw weren’t Walkers, but surviving inmates. 

“Holy shit.”

Ryan had removed his jacket, and pressed it against Hershel’s leg, ordering Maggie to do it. 

“He is bleeding out! We have to go back!” Rick panicked, while Daryl kept an eye on the inmates. 

“Keep pushing. Hard!” Rick said to Maggie, while Glenn and Ryan searched for medical supplies and stuff. 

Glenn actually found a cart, while Ryan searched, but couldn’t find any medical supplies. 

Quickly they got Hershel on the cart, and T-Dog opened the door. Ryan helped get rid of the Walkers, and made a path so they could bring Hershel back as quick as possible. Leaving the inmates, Daryl followed as last. 

“Come on, let’s go!”

Ryan pushed through, killing each Walker that was in the way, not noticing the inmates following them. Luckily Daryl and T-Dog did, but they had to push through. 

 

Once safely back in block C, Carl had reacted quickly to Rick’s order to open the door. 

They quickly laid Hershel on a bed, while Carol covered his leg in the towel she had. She gave orders, and pressed as hard as she could. 

Ryan, feeling sick of what happened, sat down against a wall, trying to keep the food Carol had brought in. What just had happened was just brutal.

“Ya okay?” Ryan looked up, and saw Daryl standing in front of him. “Ya did good back there.”

“‘M fine.” Ryan said, but almost vomited his breakfast up.

“Are ya sure?” Daryl said, but got distracted by some noise near the block entrance. He loaded his crossbow, and went to the common space that connected the block to the corridors. 

Ryan got up, and followed him, but grabbed his baseball bat first. 

“Today is your lucky day fella’s.” Ryan heard Daryl say to the five, and Ryan joined Daryl. “You’re free to go.” Daryl clearly made it sound like the government was still going. 

“What have you going on in there?” The long haired inmate asked, with a threatening undertone. He was probably Mexican.

“Ain’t none of your concern.” 

“Don’t be telling me what’s my concern.” The long haired inmate got the gun from his trouser. 

“Chill man. Dude’s leg is missin’.” The biggest inmate said, African-American. “Besides, we’re free now! What are we still doing here?”

“Man’s got a point.” Ryan said, threatening with his baseball bat in one hand, knife in the other. 

“What’s this twink doin’?” Mexican said. “Aren’t you a little too young to be interfering with us adults?” It was true Ryan was short, and not very muscular, but he was already 25 years old. He wasn’t exactly a kid anymore.

“What made ya think he isn’t an adult?” Daryl said. 

“Come on, I’m gonna check on my lady.” The big African-American said. 

“Group of civilians, breaking into a prison. You got no business being here.” Mexican still argued, not trusting the situation. “I be thinking there is no place for us to go to.”

“Check it yourself.” Ryan growled.

“Maybe we should just be going.” The only white inmate hesitantly said. 

“We ain’t leavin’.” The Mexican was still not trusting the situation.

“Yeah, you ain’t staying here either!” T-Dog interfered, pointing his gun to the Mexican, putting him and the others on edge. 

“It is my house, my rules, I will go where I can as I please!” The Mexican pointed his gun at T. 

The arguing started between the inmates, especially the Mexican, Daryl and T. Ryan, not paying attention to what was being said, but to the body language of the guys, slowly getting closer to the inmates. 

Suddenly, Rick stormed in, and started arguing with the Mexican. 

“How many of you are there?!” The Mexican grew restless.

“Too many for you to handle!” Rick said. 

“Did you rob a bank or somethin’? Why don’t you bring him to a hospital?” 

There was a short silence. 

“Why do you think, dumbass?” Ryan said coldly. 

“Shut it! I’m talking to mister good guy here.” The Mexican now pointed his gun to Ryan, but Daryl almost jumped in front of him, keeping Ryan behind him. “Then keep talkin’ to ‘m.” Daryl threatened.

“How long have you been locked in that cafeteria?” Rick asked.

“I don’t know, ten months?” The Mexican spoke calmer, but didn’t lose sight of anyone. 

Ryan sighed, and grew bored of the conversation, started to walk around slowly.

“You guys don’t have a cell phone or something, do you?” Ryan catched that. 

“You just don’t get it, do you.” Daryl said, still pointing his crossbow at the inmates. 

“No cell phones, no computers.” Ryan added.

“As far as we can see at least half of the population is gone.” Rick continued to explain. “Probably more is wiped out.”

“Ain’t no way.” The Mexican said in disbelief. 

“Go see for yourself.” Ryan said. “Don’t come crying about what you see out there.”

 

So be it. T-Dog, Rick and Daryl escorted the inmates out, while Ryan headed back to the others, to see how things were going with Hershel, but saw Carl sneaking out on his own.

Deciding to shadow Carl, Ryan put his baseball bat against the wall, and followed him.  

After a while of following Carl, they arrived in the infirmary. 

“What are you doing by yourself?” Ryan decided to drop the bomb after entering the infirmary. 

“Geesh! You almost gave me a heartattack!” Carl jumped. “I’m looking for usable supplies for Hershel. We need them.”

“Then at least ask someone with you.” Ryan said, looking around the infirmary, putting some bottles with antibiotics in his pockets. “It’s not safe.”

“I can handle Walkers.” Carl argued, also putting usable supplies in his pockets. Eventually finding bags, the two of them put supplies in the bags. 

“There are survivors here.” Ryan commented. “One is pretty dangerous. Wouldn’t hesitate to kill.”

“So? They aren’t here right now.”

“And what about me?” Ryan suddenly sprinted to Carl, and held his knife against the boy’s throat. 

For a second, Carl swallowed in fear, but got himself together. “If you wanted to hurt me, or anyone in the group, you would have done it already.”

Ryan rolled his eyes, let go, and grabbed more medications, even though they didn’t need it now. “That’s true. Good observation.” 

Carl smirked. “I’m glad you’re feeling at home with us. You’re pretty cool.”

“Hm? Who says I feel at home?”

“You’re a little bit friendlier than usually.”

Even though Ryan hated to admit it, he felt a bit at home in the group, and it must have spilled. 

“Could be.”

It was quiet for a bit. “Hey Ryan?”

“Spill it.”

“Sorry ‘bout your leg.”

“Not your fault.”

“I meant taking it.”

“Oh.” Ryan said, not knowing what to say more. “Forget about it.”

Quiet again, not that Ryan disliked the silence. 

“Don’t forget other medications we might need!” Carl shouted from the other side of the infirmary.

“Same to you.”

 

Carl was in high moods, because he had taken most of the stuff from the infirmary, and Ryan had taken all what Carl couldn’t take anymore. 

“Look what I got!” Carl walked straight to the cell where Hershel was being helped, and dropped the bag next to Carol. 

Carol and Lori looking up in surprise, and Carol digging into the bag. “Where did you find this?”

“The infirmary. There wasn’t much left, but we cleared it out.”

“You went by yourself?” Lori asked in disbelief. 

“Yeah.” Carl said. “Ryan came after me though.”

Lori her expression got from disbelief to shocked and a mix of anger. “Are you crazy?!”

“No big deal. I killed two Walkers before Ryan caught up with me.”

“Y-.. Do you see this? This was with the whole group.” Lori tried to explain to Carl, when Ryan stepped in and leaned against the door frame. 

“We needed supplies, so…” Lori didn’t let Carl finish.

“I appreciate tha-” Lori cut Carl off. 

“Then get off my back!” This time, Carl didn’t let Lori finish.

“Carl!” Ryan said stern, not expecting Carl to get quite rude to Lori. 

“That’s no way to talk to your mother.” Beth said. 

“Listen, I think it’s great you wanna help.” Lori started, but Carl stormed off. 

Ryan turned on his heels, and followed Carl, who ran to the bed he had taken.

“Go away.” Carl said, and he sounded as if he was crying. 

“You’ve heard this probably tons of times.” Ryan said, a bit unsure. “But Lori is your mother. She’s only concerned about you.”

“What do you know about it?!”

“Honestly, nothing.” Ryan said, and sat down on the bed. 

“What are you talking about?” Carl said, not understanding what Ryan meant by that. 

“My mother had a fight with her husband after I was born. He left, dumping me with her.” Ryan said. “You see, my mother had cheated, and after I was born, it came out. My mother had black hair and brown eyes, and her husband too. It was clear I wasn’t their child, but of another man.”

Carl looked up, not saying a word because he wanted to hear everything. 

“My mother was so pissed at me, accusing me of her divorce. As I grew, she noticed I started to look like that guy. She took her anger out on me. Eventually, she married another guy when I was twelve, and they got a baby. She and her new husband loved the baby so much, while taking out their shit on me. I grew to hate that child, because she got the love I never got. Now, every time I hear a baby crying, a child laughing, all that kind of stuff, I get a blind vision of hate.” Ryan tried to stay as vaguely as possible, not wanting to be vulnerable. “I know, this isn’t your situation Carl, but it hurts me to see your mom try so hard, and you not accepting that.” Ryan got up, and walked away. 

Carl was speechless by the story Ryan had just told, but got up and ran after him. 

“Ryan.” He called, and when Ryan turned around to look at the boy, he got hugged. “Thank you.”

“Yeah, yeah, enough hugging already.” Ryan said, and gently pushed Carl away. “Just don’t tell my story to anyone.”

“Promise.”

The two of them noticed a bit of panic, and ran to Hershel’s cell, seeing Lori giving heart massages to Hershel. 

“He stopped breathing.” Carol said, but right at that moment, Hershel started breathing again. 

The group’s adrenaline rush calmed down after knowing Hershel was breathing again, until the others came back. Rick stepped inside the cell, while Daryl watched from the outside over the heads of Carl and the shoulder of Ryan.

There were movements from Hershel, and after a few moments, he had opened his eyes. 

Maggie and Beth their happiness went through the roof, even though they had to contain it. Rick released Hershel’s wrist from the cuffs, and the others notably relaxed more. Deciding the family needed a little privacy, Ryan turned around and walked away to his own cell. 

 

“Can I see it?” Daryl stood in the doorway of Ryan his cell.

Ryan, resting his eyes for a bit on his bed, opened an eye, and looked Daryl in the eye. “See what?”

“Your leg.”

“Nothing to see there.” Ryan said, but still took his prosthesis off, and rolled the trouser leg up. “See?” 

All Daryl saw was the stump, which wasn’t cut off as brutally as Hershel’s. “Does it hurt?” He sat down next to Ryan on the bed, noticing Ryan was keeping an eye out. It was clear Ryan was on his guard at all times, but was opening up a lot compared to the first few weeks he was in the group.

“Not really. Sometimes it stings a little.” Ryan answered, and rubbed the stump. “Wish I had my full leg though. Can you pass me the bag?”

Daryl did as he was asked to, and passed the bag to Ryan. It wasn’t his usual backpack. 

Ryan opened it, and grabbed some bandages that weren’t needed for Hershel, and started to wrap the stump. Noticing Daryl looked at him, Ryan started to explain. “Carl and I cleared the infirmary. All that Hershel needs is with him.”

“But you’re wrappin’ your leg, it isn’t bleedin’.”

“Oh, yeah, my own leg wrap, sock, whatever you want to call it is fucking dirty. Needs to be washed.” Ryan kept wrapping. “This is temporary.”

Daryl didn’t answer, but kept looking.

“What?” Ryan asked. 

“Nothin’.” Daryl answered, and looked away. 

“Hm.” Ryan grabbed his prosthesis, and put it on again. 

“Ya sleep with that on?” Daryl suddenly asked.

“When we were outside, I did. Now since we are quite safe, I can sleep without it.” Ryan said. “Why?  Wanna rob me in my sleep, since I can’t go after you when it’s off?” Ryan did an attempt to joke.

“Fuck no.” Daryl said in defense. “Just curious.”

“Noticed.” Ryan said. 

“Ya ‘re openin’ up more.”

“You’re the second one to notice that.” Ryan said, rolling his eyes, and leaning back on the bed. 

“‘M glad. Ya ‘re a nice guy.” Daryl felt awkward. 

“Thanks, I guess.” Ryan said. “You too.”

“You know, the Mexican got me thinkin’.” Daryl started. “How old are ya?”

“Twenty-five.”

“Wait, are ya kiddin’?” 

“Do I sound like I’m kidding, Daryl?” Ryan looked at Daryl, who also had sat back on the bed, resting his back against the wall. 

“You look younger. Like eighteen or somethin’.”

Ryan smirked a bit, for the first time in forever. “Yeah, I got that a lot. So… What about you?”

“What about me?”

“What’s your age?”

“Somewhere at the end of my 30’s. Lost track when I passed the thirty.”

“I see.” Ryan said awkwardly.

_ Fuck, he’s handsome… Especially for his age... _

“Thanks, I guess.” Daryl said, a bit confused. 

“Fuck, I said that out loud.” Ryan cursed and shot up, wanting to walk away, but got grabbed by the arm by Daryl.

“Wait.” Daryl said. 

“I’ll wait if you let me go.” Ryan shook his arm, not getting the grip off.

Daryl let go, and Ryan turned around to face Daryl.

“You’re gay?” Daryl asked.

It was quiet for a bit, as Ryan had lowered his head to stare at the ground. 

“Hey, there’s nothin’ wrong with bein’ gay.” Daryl said, hoping to lessen the tension, but noticed Ryan biting his lip, as if he was holding back emotions. 

“What do you know about it? It’s not like you’re the same as me.” Ryan suddenly said, sounding softer than normal. 

“I am.”

“No, you’re not. You pretend to care, but in reality, you’re just trying to make me feel better about myself.”

“Ryan. I’ve never said this before, not even to the group, and promise me it’ll be between us.” Daryl said. “I’ll kill you if you spill it.”

That caught Ryan’s attention, and looked up. “Wait. You’re gay, too?”

Daryl nodded. “Yeah… Bisexual...”

“That’s something I didn’t expect.” Ryan admitted. 

Both were quiet, not knowing what to say.

Eventually Daryl announced he would be going to see Rick, and excused himself.

“Hey, Daryl.” Ryan said just before he had left out of sight. “Thank you.”


	3. Losing control

The next day was full of moving the cars inside the courtyard, together with Carol, T-Dog, Rick and Daryl. If they would be stored outside, it would attract more people, and that was something the group wanted to prevent. After that, they would gather the bodies, and burn them. 

“Where are Glenn and Maggie? We could use some help.” Carol said. 

“Up in the guardtower.” Daryl said, pointing at the tower itself. 

“The guardtower?” Rick asked, looking at the tower. “They were just up there last night!”

“Glenn!” Daryl started shouting. “Maggie!”

Ryan looked up, and noticed the door opening with Glenn stepping outside, fixing his pants and no shirt.  

“Hey,” Glenn sounded awkward. “What’s up guys?” Still fixing his pants, while Maggie was fixing herself out of sight.

The small group started snickering, even Ryan. 

“You comin’?” Daryl shouted back,

“What?” Glenn answered, causing more giggles from the group. 

“You comin’?” Daryl repeated. “Come on, we could use a hand.”

“Yeah, we’ll be right down!” Glenn assured, and went back in with Maggie.

The group got moving again, until T discovered some movement. “Hey Rick.”

Rick looked around, and noticed the two surviving prisoners approaching. 

“Come with me.” Rick said softly, and marched to the two, Daryl and T following. Ryan stayed with Carol. 

The prisoners rambling about not wanting to stay there bored Ryan, so he leaned against a car, picking his hails clean. Once he heard the rattle of chains, he looked up, and saw Daryl had locked the gate between the prisoners and them. 

“You want them living in a cell next to you?” Rick asked T-Dog. “They’ll just wait for a chance to our weapons.”

Ryan rolled his eyes, and went to see how Hershel was doing. To his surprise, he met Hershel in the middle of the walk to the cellblock. 

“Doing better I see.” Ryan said.

“Yes.” Hershel answered. “I think I can get the hang of this.”

Ryan nodded and walked behind Hershel to just see the man going. The steps outside were a little challenging for him, but luckily he had Lori, Beth and Carl with him before Ryan ran into him. 

“You cleared all the bodies out? It’s starting to look like a place we can actually live.” Hershel commented.

“Watch your step, the last thing we need is you falling.” Lori answered.

“All right Hershel!” Glenn cheered from the fence, where Rick, Daryl and he just climbed through. Apparently they had found some firewood.

“You’re doing great, daddy.” Beth said, proud of her father. 

“Ready for a race, Hershel?” Carl said, jokingly.

“Gimme another day, I’ll take you on.” Hershel answered, which made Beth and Carl giggle. 

The group just stared at each other, proud Hershel was up and outside, but Ryan felt uneasy. He heard some shuffling, so he turned around. 

“Walkers!” Ryan suddenly shouted, grabbing his knife, ready to destroy some brains. “Run!”

Ryan launched himself to the closest Walker, stabbing him in the head, quickly withdrawing the weapon to stab another one. 

“Get out of there! Now! Lori!” Ryan heard Rick shout, and several gunshots were heard. 

Glancing back, Ryan saw Lori firing a gun to the Walkers, killing them. Even Carl shot his gun, hitting every Walker that came too close in the head. 

“Behind you, dad!” Ryan heard, and saw a Walker close to where Hershel was limping. Quickly Ryan threw the knife, and even though he had never used that technique before, the knife ended up penetrating the Walker his brain. 

“The gate is open!” T-Dog shouted while killing off Walkers. 

Rick, Glenn and Daryl were still between the outer fences, trying to get in, but that didn’t stop the group from saving bullets. 

Hearing some grumble, Ryan noticed a Walker in the corner of his eye. He didn’t have the knife to kill it with, and his baseball bat was inside, so he had to deal with it bare-handed. 

“Ryan!” He heard Carl shout. “Get over here!” 

Ignoring Carl, Ryan tackled the Walker, and kicked it on the head until the skull broke and the brains were destroyed by Ryan his boots. 

Carl got almost dragged inside by his mother and Maggie, leaving Ryan alone in the courtyard. The others were behind fences or inside.

Ryan shot towards his knife, grabbing it out of the skull of the killed Walker, but got grabbed by another Walker, before stabbing the fucker into the eye, effectively killing it. 

Rick, Daryl and Glenn finally made it to the courtyard, helping Ryan kill some Walkers. 

The courtyard was clean now, noticing the fence had closed again. 

“T got bit!” Ryan heard, and looked around shocked. Beth was answering the questions Rick fired at her.

Walking to the fence to kill the trapped Walkers, a loud alarm went off, causing Ryan to cover his ears. The alarm was so loud to attract Walkers from outside to the prison. 

“Fuck!” Ryan cursed, while Glenn and Rick fired at the speakers that spread the sound. 

Rick started shouting at one of the prisoners, while Ryan couldn’t see straight anymore. The alarm buzzed into his head, even though he had his ears covered. Ryan landed on the floor, trying to cut the buzzing out, but he couldn’t. The sound was too loud, and too familiar. It was like Ryan his whole body was being taken by the sound. 

Minutes, what felt like hours passed, when the sound finally stopped, but Ryan kept laying in the position for minutes more, keeping his ears covered, on the verge of crying. 

Hershel and Beth made it outside of the fence once the sound had stopped, worried sick about Ryan, who had laid on the ground in what appeared to be agony. 

“Hershel!” Rick panted while running outside, Daryl noticing Ryan laying on the ground, and tried to grab his shoulder, only to be met with eyes filled with fear, and a knife near his throat. He decided to leave Ryan be, but kept an eye out for him. 

“You didn’t find them?” Hershel asked. 

“Thought maybe they made it back out here.” Glenn said. 

Beth shook her head, while Hershel asked. “What about T and Carol?”

“They didn’t make it.” Daryl said, glancing over the concrete ground.

“That doesn’t mean the others didn’t.” Rick said, turning to Daryl. “We’re going back. Daryl and Glenn, you go…”

Rick got cut off by a new sound; the sound of a baby crying. Maggie and Carl walked outside, with devastating looks on their faces, Carl only looking at the ground. No Lori to be found. 

Maggie, with the baby in her hands, tried to speak, but had trouble talking due to the emotions overwhelming her. 

“W-where is she?” Rick tried while walking back and forth, looking for Lori.

Rick didn’t get an answer, and tried to get past Maggie. 

“No, Rick, don’t.” Maggie tried to stop him. 

Barely past Carl, Rick broke out in tears. 

The whole group was just quiet, or sobbing. 

Rick just stared in front of himself, while Daryl tried to get him out of his trance. “Rick, can you hear me?”

While Ryan was still laying on the ground, trying to keep himself together, the crying of the baby grew on his nerves. Before he could stop himself, or anyone else could stop him, he shot up towards the baby, and held his knife to her head. Before he could do anything to the baby, he got tackled by Daryl, pinning him down on the floor. 

“Make it stop!” Ryan screamed, trying to work Daryl off his body, mildly panicking. “Get off me!” Ryan had thrown the knife away, and tried to get Daryl off him with both hands. 

Somehow, Ryan had been able to get away from Daryl, and ran off to his own cell. 

 

Maggie and Daryl had gone to find some formula for the baby, while Glenn watched Ryan. Having Ryan around the baby was dangerous, he thought, remembering the situation which caused Ryan to snap. Carl actually came upstairs with the baby to see how Ryan was doing. 

“Carl, it isn’t safe to keep you and the baby around him.” Glenn warned. “He’s dangerous.”

“No.” Carl said, looking at Ryan who laid in the bed. “He’s just broken.”

“You saw what he did!” Glenn hissed, not wanting to alarm the, what appeared, sleeping Ryan.

“I trust him, Glenn. Here,” Carl handed over the baby. “I’ll talk to him if you’ll hold her.”

Glenn took the baby, and went downstairs, knowing Carl could defend himself, but still kept an ear out. Once down the stairs, he handed over the baby to Beth, so he could jump between Ryan and Carl once it would go wrong. 

But it didn’t go wrong. He heard the two talk, or better said; he heard Carl talk, and sometimes a response from Ryan. 

Deciding it was safe, he went and searched for Rick.

 

“Hey Ryan,” Carl said while opening the cell door. “How are you holding up?”

“Go away.” Ryan’s voice sounded raw. “Before I hurt you too.”

“You won’t hurt me.” Carl said. “You won’t hurt anyone.”

“I already did.” Ryan answered. 

“No, you protected us. If you didn’t kill those Walkers, we all could have died.” 

“I didn’t do shit. Besides, you’re the only one thinking like that. Haven’t you heard Glenn just now? Haven’t you seen Daryl’s look on his face? They think I’m a treat and want me gone.” Ryan said. “Just when I started to feel comfortable in the group…” That last did Ryan whisper, but Carl heard it anyway. 

“Look, they don’t know what caused your actions, I do.” Carl said. 

No response from Ryan.

“I’m not letting you get kicked out because of your past. You’re family now.”

“I’m not.”

“You are. You’re not my brother by blood, but you just are my brother.” Carl said, which caused Ryan to look up.

“How can you say that?”

“It’s what I feel.” Carl said honestly. “I love you as my brother.”

Ryan didn’t say anything, just looked at Carl. 

“Everyone here sees you as family.” Carl stood up. “Even the baby loves you.”

Carl walked away, but couldn’t get far, because Ryan had stopped him, by grabbing his wrist.

“Thank you.” Ryan said, and let Carl go again.

“No problem, bro.” Carl smiled. 

 

“How’s she doin’?” Daryl asked as soon as he and Maggie got back from the search. Carl had the girl, and gently handed her over to Daryl. Since the baby was crying, Daryl started shushing her, and gently rocked her back and forth. 

Ryan saw all from looking from the porch, keeping his distance. Beth and Maggie were making the formula, and once that was done, they had handed it over to Daryl to feed her. 

“Come on, come on…” Daryl spoke softly to the baby, and Ryan noticed Glenn coming back with the prisoners, but quickly focussed on Daryl again, who kind of awkwardly laughed, because he didn’t ever expect to hold a baby. 

“She got a name yet?” Daryl asked.

“Not yet.” Carl said. “I was thinking maybe Sophia. Carol too. And Andrea. Amy. Jaqui. Patricia. Or Lori. I don’t know.”

Daryl didn’t know what to say, but still kept feeding the baby, who now made drinking noises instead of crying. “Ya like that, huh? Lil’ Asskicker.” Daryl looked around. “Righ’? That’s a good name.” Everyone started laughing. 

“Lil’ Asskicker. You like that, huh, sweetheart?” Daryl was all sweet, and Ryan almost felt something spark in his chest, but it was overwhelmed by the fear of hurting the baby. 

He turned around, and made it back to his cell, not wanting to ruin this moment. 

 

“What’s wrong with you?!” Daryl hissed to Ryan, after handing the baby over to Maggie, and running to Ryan’s cell. “Attacking an innocent baby who wasn’t even an hour old?!”

“Daryl!” Carl came running behind Daryl. “Don’t…”

“Get away, Carl, don’ wantchu get hurt too.” Daryl said. 

“You don’t get it, Daryl, please listen to him.” Carl pleaded and actually stood in between the two.

“Talk.” Daryl said, aiming for Ryan. 

Ryan had opened his mouth, but nothing of his story came out. “I… I can’t…”

“Then I’ll tell him.” Carl said, not waiting for Ryan’s approval. “Ryan got abused by his mother since he was born. His mother had cheated on her husband, and that came out when Ryan was born, looking nothing like his mother or her husband. Once his mother married another man, they got a child, but loved that child to death, but still abused Ryan. Now, every time Ryan hears a baby crying, he’s so angry he grows blind to what’s happening, so much hate he carries with him.” 

Daryl kept quiet during the story, glancing once in awhile to Ryan, who slowly grew tensed. 

“Is that true?” Daryl asking Ryan, and Ryan nodded. 

“I’m not making this up!” Carl said. “It really happened.”

Ryan bit on his lower lip to keep tears from falling, but once they did, it wasn’t stoppable. The wall Ryan had build up from when he was a kid, started crumbling right at this moment. Breaking down in tears, Ryan tried to stay tough, but eventually gave in. He felt two strong arms slowly around him, pulling him closer. And Ryan allowed it. Daryl held Ryan tight as if he would fade away any minute, and Ryan clung to Daryl’s chest as if his life depend on it. 

“It’s okay…” Daryl shushed, as if he was holding Lil’ Asskicker. 

Carl left the two together, since Ryan needed to cry out for a bit, and went down. 

“How did it go?” Glenn asked. 

“I need to tell you guys Ryan’s story. It isn’t a nice one.” Carl said, telling the story to the listening ears. 

 

After a long time of just crying, Ryan just stood against Daryl, not minding the physical contact with the older guy. Daryl still kept Ryan close to him, soothing him. 

It had gone dark already, and Carl had gone to bed already, after this draining day. Beth was getting ready to sleep, while Hershel, Maggie and Glenn just sat together. 

“Get to bed.” Daryl said, slowly guiding Ryan to the bed. “I’ll take your prosthesis off…” 

Daryl carefully watched Ryan’s expression, but all he did was nod. 

Removing the bloodstained boots from both of Ryan’s feet, kept notice of Ryan’s expression.

After that, he went to remove the prosthesis, which was tricky at first, but it did come off properly. Ryan kept still all the time, so Daryl didn’t have a clue if he had hurt Ryan. 

“Wake me up if you need anything.” Daryl said, and Ryan nodded as a response. 

Daryl walked out of the cell, but Ryan had called him. 

“Hey Daryl?” Daryl had heard from the guy, and returned. 

“What’s it?”

“Can you move your mattress here? I don’t want to sleep alone at the moment...” 

“Sure, gimme a sec.” Daryl went and grabbed his mattress, and pulled it into the cell, next to Ryan’s bed. 

“Thanks…” Ryan said, and dozed off quickly after.

Daryl kept looking at Ryan his face, and went to sleep too, knowing Glenn kept watch.  

 

Early in the morning, Daryl woke up to an unfamiliar feeling. When his vision was adjusted to the dark, he saw Ryan had laid down next to him on the floor, with his back to Daryl. Daryl hadn’t notice him move from the bed at all, but he didn’t mind. Usually Ryan only slept for a few hours a night, as Daryl had noticed while having watch before they found the prison. 

Ryan had opened up to Daryl, and surely, Daryl had opened up a bit to Ryan.

After a bit of staring to Ryan’s back, Ryan suddenly shot up, panting and sweating.

“Fuck.” Ryan cursed, and covered his eyes with his hands. 

“Ya okay?” Daryl asked, voice raw from sleep. 

For a second Ryan was startled, but after remembering the last evening. “Daryl…”

“Yeah, I’m here.” Daryl sat up next to Ryan. “Ya okay?”

“Nightmare…” Ryan answered, rubbing his eyes. 

“Wanna talk ‘bout it?” Daryl asked, despite the fact Ryan would say no. 

“‘Bout my mother and her new husband…” Ryan spoke, which Daryl didn’t expect. “Even their child…”

“It’s okay.” Daryl said, carefully laying his hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “They not here. You’re safe with us.”

“I’m just so scared I’ll hurt Lil’ Asskicker…” Ryan said. “In my nightmare I attacked the child of mom and her husband too… Killing it...”

“You’re not like that. I’ll make sure Lil’ Asskicker an’ you get best buddies.”

Ryan looked at Daryl, and just looked at him. Leaning in, Ryan rested his head on Daryl’s shoulder. “I don’t know what to do…”

Daryl stayed quiet. 

“Guys, come down and eat!” Carl shouted from downstairs. 

“Come on.” Daryl said, and helped Ryan up, since Ryan didn’t wear his prosthesis.

 

Once down, they got some breakfast. Ryan sat next to Hershel, and the two spoke for a bit. 

“How’s your leg?” Ryan asked.

“It’s still painful, and not having that part of my leg is weird, but I’m getting the hang of it.” Hershel answered.

“If you need some advice, you can come to me.” Ryan offered. 

“Thank you, I really appreciate it.”

It was quiet again, but then, Rick suddenly entered the space, looking absolutely horrible.

“Cleared out the boiler block.” Rick commented. 

“How many were there?” Daryl asked from the small staircase he sat on.

“I don’t know. Dozen… Two dozen…” Rick answered. “Have to get back. Just wanted to check on Carl.” Rick patted Carl on the shoulder.

“Rick! We can take care of the bodies.” Glenn said, standing up. “You don’t have to…”

“No I have to.” Rick walked over to Daryl. “Everyone has a gun and a knife?” 

“Yeah.” Daryl answered. “‘Xcept Ryan.”

“Good.” Rick answered. “Just get Ryan a knife and a gun.”

“Runnin’ out of ammo tho.” Daryl added. 

“Maggie and me were planning on making a run this afternoon.” Glenn said. “Looking for some places for bullets and formula.”

Rick and Daryl had a short conversation about the generator room, but Rick quickly left after. 

“Rick.” Hershel said, but Rick had slammed the door behind him and walked away. 

“He is losing it…” Ryan said. 

“I’m going after him.” Hershel said, and went off. 

Daryl stood up and took Hershel his place. “Here.” He put a knife on the table. The knife Ryan had gotten from Daryl. “It was out in the courtyard.”

“I don’t want it.” Ryan said. “I’m only gonna hurt the baby more.”

“Not if I keep ya from that.” Daryl said. “Ya need to be able to fight. Also found some bullets for ya gun.”

Ryan looked at Daryl, and accepted the knife, putting it back where he usually kept it. “Thanks.”

 

The group splitted to clear some corridors. Ryan went with Daryl and Carl, walking behind them as usual, keeping their backs safe. 

“We’ll get ‘em on the way back. Don’t look like they can go anywhere.” Daryl said when he saw a door opening and closing, but it got blocked by a body. 

The three of them walked further. 

“Come on.” Daryl lead the way, talking to Carl. “Me mom, she liked the wine. She’d like to smoke in bed. Virginia Slims.” Daryl kept checking every door they came across. “I was playin’ out with kids in the neighborhood.  I could do that with Merle gone. They had bikes, I didn’t. We heard sirens gettin’ louder. Yeah, they jumped on their bikes, ran after it, y’know, hopin’ to see somethin’ worth seein’.” He checked another door. “I ran after ‘em, but couldn’t keep up. Ran around the corner, saw my friends lookin’ at me. Hell, I saw everyone lookin’ at me. Fire trucks everywhere, people from the neighborhood. It was my house they were there for. That was my mom in bed, burned down in nothin’. That was the hard part. Y’know, she’s just gone. Erased. Nothin’ left of her.” Daryl took a short pause, before continuing the story. “People said it was better that way. Ha. I don’t know. Made it seem like it wasn’t real, y’know.” He was quiet again. 

“I shot my mom.” Carl suddenly said, grabbing Daryl’s attention. “She was out, hadn’t turned yet.” Carl sighed. “I ended it. That was real.” The two stared at each other for a bit. 

“I’m sorry about your mom.” Carl said, and looked at the floor, but looked back up again.

“‘M sorry ‘bout yours.” Daryl replied, before shortly grabbing Carl’s shoulder. “Come on.”

Ryan had been quiet all the time, listening to both stories. 

The couple of them checked out a cell, before the moans a Walker made. Ryan quickly put a bullet between eyes, while Daryl investigated the knife that was stuck in the neck.

“That’s Carol's knife.” He said, looking a bit confused, before wiping it clean on the Walker’s clothes. 

“Is she alive?” Carl asked with a spark of hope. 

“Don’t count on that,” Ryan said. “Much could have happened.”

“Go back.” Daryl said, staying behind himself. 

 

Once back, the two saw Beth stirring in a pot, and Hershel holding the Lil’ Asskicker. Carl sat next to Beth. Ryan went went back to Daryl, being concerned about him. 

Once nearing the place where the door was opening and closing against a Walker’s body, Ryan heard the knife being jabbed into the floor over and over again. 

Grunting, Daryl slammed against the wall he sat against repeatedly, getting irritated because of the door opening and closing. Ryan turned the corner to find Daryl harshly kicking the door shut, and started to walk around. Daryl put the knife into his mouth, and relocated the body jamming the door. Ryan also grabbed his knife, and was ready for Daryl to open the door. 

Once Daryl had slammed the door open, they found something they didn’t expect. 

The two of them were quiet, because the very weak Carol sat there against the wall. Daryl touched her chin for a moment before picking her up. He carried Carol through the corridors while Ryan kept behind them. 

Once back in the cellblock, Daryl laid Carol in a bed, grabbing her a bottle of water. 

Ryan made sure Carol would stay awake, gently slapping her in the face. “Stay awake, Carol. Stay with me.”

Daryl quickly gave Carol some water, before hearing some rushing sounds coming into the cellblock. “I’ll check it out.”

After Carol had some water, she clearly looked better, and was slowly sitting up. 

Daryl came back with the others, looking very surprised to see Carol again. 

Ryan backed up a bit, giving everyone some space. Carol slowly got up, and hugged Rick. All of them smiled to see Carol back, even Daryl had a small smile on his face.

“How?” Hershel asked and hugged her too. 

“She found a cell, passed out dehydrated.” Daryl answered. 

Carol finally saw Lil’ Asskicker, and grew emotional when she learned Lori hadn’t survived. 

Slowly, Ryan stepped out of the cell, noticing a black woman, with shoulder-length dreadlocks looking from the cell door that separated the hall from the cellblock. 

 

Rick, Daryl, Ryan and Hershel walked into the hall where the woman was. She was sitting on one of the prison chairs around a table. 

“We can treat that wound for you, we can give you food and water and send you off again.” Rick said, with his hand on his gun. “But you have to tell us how you found us, and why you were carrying formula.”

Daryl was on guard with a loaded crossbow, while Ryan stood next to him with his baseball bat. 

“The supplies were dropped by a young Asian and a pretty girl.” The woman with dreadlocks said, while pressing the towel against her leg where the gunshot wound was.

“What happened?” Rick asked. 

“Were they attacked?” Hershel asked. 

“They were taken.” The woman answered.

“Taken?” Rick asked. “By who?”

“By the same son of a bitch who shot me.” She answered. 

“Hey, these are our people, tell us what happened, now!” Rick painfully pressed against her wound. 

“Don’t you ever touch me again!” The woman got up, alarming Daryl to aim his crossbow, and Ryan to be ready to swing his bat.

“Better start talking.” Daryl threatened. “Otherwise you have a bigger problem than a gunshot wound.”

“Find them yourself.” The woman almost hissed. 

“Put the crossbow down.” Rick said, pulling the bow down himself, not losing eye contact with the woman. 

“You came here for a reason.” Rick said, gesturing to Ryan to put his bat down, which he did. 

The woman took a while to talk. “There is a town. Woodbury. About 75 survivors. I think they were taken there.”

“A whole town?” Rick questioned. 

“It’s run by this guy who calls himself the Governor.” She said. “Pretty boy, charming.”

“He’s got muscle?” Daryl asked.

“Paramilitary wannabe’s.” She answered. “They’ve guards on every wall.”

“You know a way in?” Rick asked, his expression softening a bit. 

“The place is secure from Walkers, but we could slip our way through.” 

“How did you know how to get here?” Rick asked further. 

“They mentioned a prison, said the direction it was in, it was a straight shot.”

Rick looked at the woman for a second. “This is Hershel. Father of the girl that was taken. He’ll be taking care of that.” Rick pointed at her leg, and walked away, followed by Daryl. Ryan stayed to make sure everything went well, while Hershel treated the wound. 

 

Hershel carefully stitched the wound up, while being watched by the lady. Carl stood by the door, with his hand on his gun, also making sure the woman wouldn’t hurt Hershel. The lady eventually glared at Carl. 

“Thank you.” She said to Hershel, when he was done with stitching her up. 

Ryan had wandered off to the group who were discussing the take back of Glenn and Maggie. 

“I’ll go,” Ryan said, leaning against the stairs where the group was discussing. 

“Great.” Rick said, allowing Beth, Axel, Oscar and Ryan to go with Daryl.

Ryan didn’t take much with him, except his knife and gun, and helped Daryl and Oscar packing the car with supplies they might need. Eventually, Beth, and Axel didn’t go with them because Ryan had jumped in for them. Besides, sneaking in wasn’t their best ability, while Ryan was stealthy as Daryl, if not more. The woman went too, because she knew the place. 

On her advice, Rick parked the car into the grass next to the road they had been traveling. 

“It’s better to go on foot. They have patrols.” The woman said after getting out of the car. 

“How far? The night is coming.” Rick commented, getting his stuff out of the car too. 

“A mile. Maybe two.” 

The group went into the forest, walking towards the Woodbury, after the woman yet to tell her name. 

“Down!” Rick said after spotting several Walkers, and everyone obeyed. “In formation, no gunfire.” Rick said, and slung his manchette into the nearest Walker’s head. 

Oscar killed one, and Daryl shot his crossbow at another Walker, while Ryan took care of one too. 

“Too many of ‘em.” Daryl commented. 

The group decided to flee the group of Walkers, and ran through the forest. 

“In here!” Rick whisper-shouted, when he saw a wooden house.

They entered the house, and closed the door directly after. 

“Keep it down.” Rick said, crouching. 

“The smell, wow.” Daryl commented, while Ryan kept his nose closed. 

“What’s that?” Oscar asked after seeing and hearing flies around a corpse. 

“A fox or somethin’.” Daryl said. “Looks like Lassie went home.”

Walkers outside started banging on the house, wanting to get the food that just went inside. 

Rick and Daryl went a bit further, seeing a figure on a bed with a blanket over him. Rick quickly removed the blanket, to be met with a screaming man. “Get out of my house! Now!”

“Tell him to shut up!” The woman hushed. 

“We will, but we can’t go now.” Rick said, trying to calm the man down. 

Ryan didn’t follow the conversation Rick was having with the man, but it ended in a fight. The man had shot his gun, after Rick had pushed it out of the way quickly. 

The man made it out of Rick’s arms, and ran to the door, wanting to open it. The woman quickly stabbed her katana through his back, killing him. Quickly, Daryl helped Rick getting the body up, and Ryan quickly opened and closed the door, as the body was pushed out, being bait for the Walker’s outside. The group quietly made it out of the house, with the Walkers being distracted. 

 

It was dark when the group arrived at the walls around the town. The walls were being guarded by a lot of people.

“Shit. We need to downsize.” Rick said, removing his shotgun. 

“Can’t check every building with this much guards.” Daryl said, keeping his crossbow. 

The woman lead the group into a house, to get inside Woodbury. Ryan checked out the windows, which were covered with fabric. Gently moving the fabric away, he saw people walking. 

Ryan walked to the back with Rick, discussing what further, until there was someone knocking on the door. 

It was a guy, rambling about how he knew the group was in there, and they knew they weren’t supposed to be here. 

Rick tackled him asking questions where Maggie and Glenn were, but no success, and put him on his knees, while Daryl zip tied him. Ryan knocked him out by kicking his head. 

Outside were gunshots to be heard, alarming the group. 

There was chaos, making it perfect to sneak out of the house unnoticed, and sneaked into a building where the gunshots were closest. Rick went in first, his gun up, followed by Daryl. 

As the group walked in, they heard voices, and noticed through a fogged up window there were people moving towards them. Quickly Ryan and Rick threw smoke bombs around the corner, successfully distracting the people.

Oscar and Rick grabbed Maggie and Glenn, and guided them out of there, while the woman, Daryl and Ryan shot into the smoke clouds. 

Quickly the group made it out, and guided Maggie and Glenn into a building, the woman locking herself out. From the group were quite panicked voices, but one stood out to Ryan in particular.  

“Daryl.” Glenn said. “Merle did this.”

“Did you see him?” Daryl asked. 

“Up close.” Glenn said, getting a shirt on. “He threw a Walker at us. Wanted to execute us.”

“My brother is the Governor?” Daryl questioned. 

“No.” Maggie said. “That’s somebody else. Your brother is a lieutenant or something”

“Does he know I’m still with ya guys?”

Maggie nodded. “He does now.” Glenn answered.  “Rick I’m sorry, I told him where the prison was.”

“Don’t. No need to apologise.” Rick said, keeping an arm out for Glenn. “We have to get back. Can you walk? The car is close.”

Glenn nodded, and got up with the help of Maggie and Rick. 

“Hey! If Merle is around I need to see him!” Daryl said. 

“Not now, we are in enemy territory.” Rick said. 

“He’s my brother.”

“We need to leave now!”

“Maybe we can work somethin’ out!” Daryl looked desperate to see his brother. 

“We have to get out. You’re not thinking straight.” Rick said. 

Ryan quickly helped Glenn walk, since Rick was talking to Daryl. 

 

Daryl opened the door and threw two smoke bombs on the street. Once the smoke was up, the group could run out of the house, weapons ready to fire. 

One of the guards on top of the wall spotted them, and pointed his flashlight on them. The group started shooting their way out. They had to go into a small ally. 

“I’m gonna give you some back up, but you need to go.” Ryan said, already having planned out his plan. 

“We can’t do that, we have to stay together.” Maggie said, and fired her gun again. 

“You need to get out!” Ryan said, putting his knife into his left boot, under his prosthesis foot. “Trust me.”

That last part sounded special to the group, Ryan putting himself on the line for the group is something they didn’t expect. 

Ryan grabbed Oscar his automatic weapon, and waited until Daryl had thrown the smokebomb. 

Ryan ran out first, killing some enemies before they could shoot them. “Hurry!”

The group ran towards the school bus to get over the wall, Ryan and Rick giving them cover. Ryan missed one of the guards, who shot Oscar down. 

“Rick! Run!” Ryan said, firing his gun to kill more. “Go!”

“Ryan!” Rick shouted as he climbed the bus. “Daryl!”

“Go!” Daryl shouted to Rick, while he and Ryan shot at the others. 

“Daryl! Go!” Ryan shouted. 

“Not without you.”

 

“Walk.” Ryan was told by an unknown man, and Ryan did as he was told. He made damn sure he would cooperate, if he wasn’t touched. One didn’t listen, and touched him, Ryan hurting him badly. 

Next to him, he heard Daryl huff and shuffle, trying to get loose. 

“It was Merle!” A powerful voice said, probably of the Governor. “He let them in. It was you. You lied and let them in, the terrorists!”

Ryan walked until he was halted. 

“This.” The Governor spoke further, removing the sacks that were over Ryan and Daryl’s heads. “Are two of the terrorists! Merle’s own brothers!”

Shocked gasps were noticeable from the crowd surrounding them. 

Merle looked at the two, while Daryl struggled with his hands bound to his back, and Ryan just staying calm, also with his hands tied on his back. Daryl calmed a bit down after the Governor pushed him towards Merle, while Ryan took notice of his surroundings. It was nothing new for him. 

“What should we do with them?” The Governor spoke.

“Kill them!” The crowd cheered. 

“What?”

“Kill them!”

Daryl started to take notice of the surroundings too, it seemed, while Ryan actually rolled his shoulders. Daryl had seen Ryan do this one time before, and shit went down after that. 

“You wanted your brothers. Now you have them.” The Governor spoke to Merle. Merle was confused. Only Daryl was his brother, but who was the other, blond guy with similar blue eyes as his brother had. One thing Merle knew; the fire of rage in the eyes of the other guy was worse than the two Dixons together. 


	4. Trouble with Woodbury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW in this chapter.

The chants of the group rang through Ryan’s ears, causing him to get irritated. 

“Kill ‘em!”

“Put ‘em down!”

“Let me go.” A familiar voice said. Ryan turned his head, to see Andrea, the woman who didn’t make it out of the farmside with the group, struggled through the crowd. 

“Philip. Don’t do this.” She said, while big guys stopped her. “They are my friends!”

“It’s not up to me anymore,” Philip, the Governor spoke. “The people have spoken.” 

The Governor now spoke to Merle. “I asked where your loyalty was. You said here. Well, prove it.”

Daryl got uncuffed, and got instructed to uncuff Ryan. The guards were afraid of him. 

“Prove it to us all. Brothers against brothers. The winner goes free. Fight ‘til the death.”

Some in the crowd cheered, but Ryan was caught off guard. Did they have to fight each other, until the death? Ryan could kill Merle without hesitation, but Daryl, Daryl started cracking into his wall. 

“Don’t do this, Philip. Don’t do this.” Andrea pleated, but Philip didn’t react to her. 

“Go Merle!” People shouted from the crowd, cheering for him. 

Merle watched his brother for a second, who didn’t look back at him, and for a split second, Merle looked at Ryan, until he raised his hand.

“Ya’ll know me!” Merle said, walking around. “Imma do whatever I gotta do to prove…” Merle punched Daryl in the stomach, who fell on the ground. ”... my loyalty is to this town!” Kicking Daryl in the stomach, Merle tried to impress the townspeople, only to get attacked by Ryan. 

Ryan’s fist made contact with Merle’s jaw, making Merle unsteady on his feet.

Ready for the next attack, Ryan fired his fist towards Merle’s face again, hitting him hard on the jaw again, giving Daryl some time to get up. 

Hearing the moans of Walkers, Ryan turned around to see Walkers walking into the arena, being guided by guards with long sticks. 

Daryl jumped up to hit Merle, only to be pushed on the ground again. Both the brothers had their hands around each other’s necks, while the Walkers were lined up around them. Actually, since Merle only had one hand, he only had one hand around Daryl’s neck.  

“You think this asshole is goin’ to let you go?” Daryl spoke to his brother, while being pushed on the ground. 

“Just follow my lead, little brother.” Merle said back. “We’re gettin’ outta this, right now!” 

Merle pulled his brother on his feet, while standing back to back for cover against the Walkers.

“Ryan!” Daryl called, pulling Ryan by his arm, only to be met with a scream that came out of Ryan’s mouth. 

Walkers were pushed towards the guys, and Daryl realised he had to defend himself to get out alive. 

Ryan had actually managed to knock a Walker out of his “guiding stick”, and started kicking the skull into the ground, until the brain was only pulp beneath his boot. 

Merle grounded two Walkers himself too, but not killing them. 

Daryl punched some Walkers so hard, their course changed to the crowd, causing some of the crowd to scream in fear, and run away. 

Ryan had slammed his foot into another Walker’s skull, until he heard gunshots, and Walkers started to drop. Looking around for the source of the sound, the crowd panicked as some of the living got shot too. There were also smoke bombs being thrown into the arena, causing the crowd to flee and hide.

While the crowd panicked, Ryan started looking for the attackers, only to get pulled closer by Daryl, while Merle killed another Walker, or human.

“Stay close!” Merle shouted, and kept close to the two others. 

Ryan shook his arm loose, but didn’t run from the Dixons. 

“Merle, come on!” Daryl said, and started running.

“Go!” Merle said to Ryan, and started running too. 

Having no other choice but to follow the two, Ryan ran after them, with ears and eyes open for danger. 

Daryl managed to get his crossbow back from the guard who took it, and Merle knocked him out. 

“Go!” Ryan blindly followed them, but noticed a light through the smoke. As they fled the smoked area, Ryan noticed Rick and Maggie. 

“Let’s go!” Rick said, guarding the trio away, while Maggie followed them on the foot. 

Quickly, the group made it out of the arena, being close at the wall. 

“They are all at the arena. We’ve gotta go here.” Merle said quickly, trying to lead the group.

“You’re not going anywhere with us!” Rick said, looking out for danger.

“You really wanna do this now?” Merle called back, and put a hole in the wall.

“Rick, Ryan, we gotta go, now!” Daryl said, running after Merle and Maggie.

Merle was killing a Walker when the others came out. “A little help would be nice!”

Daryl fired his crossbow, and Maggie shot some others. 

“We ain’t got time for this!” Merle said, being quick on his feet, leading the group away from Woodbury. 

 

After walking through the woods, and it actually got light again, Rick called out for Glenn.

“Glenn!” Rick said, approaching the car. “Glenn. We have a problem here.”

Glenn and the woman with dreadlocks and a sword turned to Rick, but lost it when they saw Merle approaching. The woman drew her sword, and Glenn pointed his gun.

“He tried to kill me!” The woman shouted in defense when Rick tried to get the two to calm down. 

“He helped us get out!” Daryl said back. 

“Right after he beat the crap out of me!” Glenn shouted. 

“ Hey, we both took our licks, man . ” Merle said.

“Jackass.” Daryl commented back at his brother. 

“Shut up!”

“Enough!” Rick shouted.

“Get that thing outta ma face!” Daryl shouted at Glenn, who had pointed his gun at Daryl for defending Merle.  

Merle started laughing, while Daryl was on the edge of raging. “Man, looks like you’re going native brother.”

“N o more than you hanging out with that psycho back there.” Daryl faced his brother, who stood against a tree with a smug smile. 

“Oh, yeah, man. He's a real charmer, I gotta tell you that.” Merle said, taunting Daryl. “Put the wood to your friend Andrea. Big time baby.” Now Merle had turned to the woman, making disgusting noises. Ryan was on edge to punch Merle right in the face, having his fist ready. 

“Andrea is in Woodbury?” Glenn asked.  

“Right next to the Governor.” Daryl said and had calmed down.

“I told you: drop that!” Rick shouted to the woman, who had attempted to attack Merle again. “You know Andrea?”

The woman stayed quiet, but Merle answered. 

“Yep, she does.” Merle said. “Her and blondie spent all winter cuddling up in the forest. Mm-mmm-mmm. Yeah. My Nubian queen here had two pet walkers. No arms, cut off the jaws, kept them in chains. Kind of ironic now that I think about it.”

“Shut up Merle!” Daryl shouted at his brother. 

“Hey, we snagged them out of the woods. Andrea’s close to dyin’.”

Ryan had trouble containing himself, but stayed quiet while the others had their discussion. 

“Shut yourself, ya bunch of pussies…” Merle suddenly snapped, but got cut off by Ryan who knocked Merle out by hitting him hard on the side of his face.

“Asshole.” Ryan said, and walked towards the car, feeling the judging eyes of Daryl in his back. 

 

While Ryan leaned against the car, he noticed Rick, Glenn, Maggie and Daryl had a discussion about Merle.

“Hey.” The woman leaned next to Ryan, an arm length between them. “Haven’t introduced myself properly. I’m Michonne.”

“Ryan.” Ryan answered, not wanting to talk more. 

Michonne wasn’t talkative too, so the both of them waited in silence. 

Daryl had started to walk away from the discussion, towards the car, while Ryan kept an eye on Merle, who got up after being knocked out. 

“Take care of Lil’ Asskicker, Carl.” Daryl said to Rick. “He’s one tough kid.”

Daryl walked away after getting his stuff from the trunk of the car, only giving Ryan a glance while walking to Merle.

“Daryl!” Rick shouted after him, Daryl ignoring him, and walking away with Merle. 

Rick and Maggie put their guns in the trunk, and got in, while Ryan had gotten into the front already. 

They all got in, and drove away. 

 

After a while of driving, and a few obstacles, the group made it back to the prison. Rick got out of the car to talk to Carl and Carol, while Maggie drove the car to the courtyard. Ryan made it quickly out, and went off towards the cellblock. 

Ryan had noticed some new people in the common area in front of cellblock C, but he ignored them, walking past them. Carl kept watch on the people; three guys and a woman. 

Moving towards the cellblock gate, Carl quickly opened it, and closed it after Ryan went in.

Ryan had pain in his left leg, where the prosthesis was pressing against his leg. He heard the others come in, and eventually heard the baby cry. Being too tired to even react to the crying, Ryan pulled off his prosthesis, smacked into a corner of his cell, and went to bed. 

“Are you okay?” Ryan heard a soft voice say when he had laid down, with his back to the entrance of the cell. 

Giving no answer, Ryan looked up to see Beth standing on the other side of the bars. 

Ignoring her presence, he laid back down again. 

“I’m coming in.” Beth said, opening the cell door. “I noticed fresh blood on your pants. Are you hurt?”

She didn’t expect a reaction, but still reached out to pull the pants leg up. 

Noticing what Beth was doing, Ryan shot up, and pulled himself as far back as he could from her, glaring at her. 

“Let me at least check.” Beth said sternly, and pulled up the pants leg, to see a bleeding patch of skin. “Did your prosthesis hurt?”

Ryan nodded for a small second, looking away from her. 

“I’ll patch you up. Don’t move.” Beth said, and quickly grabbed some antibiotic spray and bandages from the small bag she had with her. The spray stung, but Ryan didn’t move. 

After that, Beth carefully wrapped the stump of Ryan his leg in bandage, and secured it. She didn’t make a lot of unnecessary skin contact, which Ryan appreciated, but he still flinched when she had to touch him. 

“Here you go.” Beth said. “If you need something, you can holler at me. Now catch some sleep.”

Ryan nodded in acknowledgement, and laid down again. “Thanks.”

 

“Why are you here?! Get out!” Ryan woke up to hear Rick’s voice, screaming. “Get out!”

Ryan fired up, jumping to his prosthesis, not caring if his pants leg was between his leg and the prosthesis itself, and ran downstairs, to see Rick looking around him as if he had seen a ghost, with his gun in his hand. 

The new people were running away from Rick, while Rick panted, and looked around him as if he were looking for the ghost that creeped up on him. 

Ryan sighed, nothing dangerous had happened, and he still had to get up. He used to hate that, but nowadays it’s better safe than sorry. 

“Come on kid.” Ryan spoke to Carl.

Carl nodded, and followed Ryan back into the cellblock. 

“What happened back there?” Carl asked. 

“Your dad went crazy.” Ryan answered.

“I meant at that place.”

Ryan looked at Carl, digging up the memories he had of Woodbury, but also memories from before he had met this group, not wanting to answer that painful question. “Nothing.”

“But Daryl left. With Merle!” Carl now stood in front of Ryan, demanding answers.

“Look, I’m going to sleep, trying to forget it all like it never happened.” Ryan said. “Don’t bother me with these questions.” 

Ryan walked around Carl, up the stairs. 

“Something did happen, didn’t it? You’re being the old you again.” Carl sounded concerned. 

Ignoring that last, Ryan went back into his cell. 

 

Ryan woke up when it was light already. No voices, no footsteps. Ryan got up, feeling refreshed, and walked down the stairs. 

Nobody came to greet him, so Ryan just went straight outside, noticing Hershel at the fence, talking to Rick who stood outside of the fence. Michonne was in the fields, and Carol and Axel were in the courtyard. 

“Hello to you, sleeping beauty.” Carol commented when Ryan walked to them. “Did you sleep well?”

“Hm.” Was Ryan’s answer, focussing on Rick. 

“Glenn just left to take a look at Woodbury.” Carol continued. “Beth and Maggie are taking care of the baby.”

Ryan still didn’t answer, so Carol continued talking to Axel. “Don’t you miss your brother?”

“My brother? Hell no.” Axel said. “He had a real money problem.”

“What kind of problem?”

“He didn’t lend me any.” Axel laughed, but shortly after, fell to the ground with a bullet wound through his head. 

Ryan ducked after hearing the sound, while Carol dropped behind the body. 

There was a truck in front of the fences, and the Governor had his gun in front of his face. 

It didn’t go unnoticed, because Rick came into action too.

The bridge where Rick was on, got shot too, so Rick ran back towards the prison. Hershel ducked into the long grass, while Carol laid down behind Axel, using his body as cover for the bullet rain, staying as still as she could, while Beth and Carl ran for their lives. Michonne stood hidden behind the school bus, so Ryan ran towards her to seek cover. The Governor had his buddies with him, that’s for sure. 

Someone stood on the guardtower, firing at Carol. Ryan silently cursed, not having a firearm on him at that time, but Michonne had. She tried to hit the Governor, and the guy hiding behind the open car door, but missed. 

“Ryan, here!” Maggie shouted, and threw a gun towards Ryan, and also gave one to Beth, and keeping one on herself. Even though the gun wasn’t at Ryan’s feet, it was pretty close, so Ryan ran for it. The rain of bullets had stopped as soon as there was an engine being heard, and soon after, a vehicle drove straight through the gates of the prison, and stopped in the middle of the patch of grass. 

As soon as the lid on the back opened, Walkers came out almost running, and an armed guy came out of the drivers seat, making his way out. 

Ryan started shooting at the guy, but couldn’t hit him since he was running back and forth, so he started shooting at the Walkers.

Hershel had that idea too, and they both took Walkers down.

Maggie had taken out the guy on the watch tower, so she decided to help too.  

The gun fire had attracted Walkers from outside the prison, so the Governor had decided to leave. 

Every other member of the group came out to get rid of the Walkers inside, while Glenn came back in the car, and saw the Governor leave.

Rick had trouble outside of the fence, so Ryan started running towards him, but it looked like Rick got some help already. A well known arrow had landed into the head of the Walker in front of Rick.

Daryl had appeared, and Merle started stabbing the heads of the Walkers around them. 

Glenn drove the car towards Hershel, and picked him up, while the others in the yard ran towards the stone courtyard. After everyone, except for Merle, Rick and Daryl, were safely in, they closed the gate, and watched the Walkers in the outer ring of the prison yard. 

Once the trio also safely were behind the prison fences, they all went inside. 

 

“We’re not leaving.” Rick said. 

“We can’t stay here.” Hershel said in defense, because of what just had happened. 

“What if there is a sniper out there?” Maggie commented. 

“We can’t go outside.” Beth said. 

“Not in the daylight.” Carol added. 

“If Rick says we’re not running, we’re not running.” Glenn said, made hand moves pointing at the floor. 

“No. Better live like rats.” Merle commented locked from outside the cellblock.

“You got a better idea?” Rick asked him. 

“We should have slipped out last night, live the free life. But we missed that window didn’t we?” Merle commented. “I’m sure he’s got scouts on every road to this place by now.”

“We ain’t scared of that prick.” Daryl said from the second floor, while walking towards Merle.

“You should be.” Merle said back. “That truck through the fence was just him ringing the doorbell. We might have some thick walls to hide behind, but he’s got the guns and the numbers.”

Ryan didn’t listen to Merle, to anyone really, lost in his own thoughts while cleaning his blade. 

“Get back here!” Hershel suddenly shouted to Rick, who had started walking away. The shouting caught Ryan’s attention for a second. 

“You’re slipping, Rick.” Hershel said as his calm self again. “We’ve all seen it. We understand why. But now is not the time. You once said: ‘This isn’t a democracy.’, now you have to own up to that. I put my family’s life in your hands, so get your head clear and do something.”

Ryan sighed, and got up from the stair steps he was sitting on. It was clearly the end of the conversation, and due to the attack, Ryan had hurt his wound more than he should have. 

“Beth.” Ryan said while getting upstairs. “It hurts.”

“On it.” Beth said, following Ryan to his cell to check the wound. 

“Ryan…” Daryl started, walking to him.

“Don’t.” Ryan said, not even giving Daryl a glance. 

“So that’s his name. Ryan.” Merle commented, with a grin. “He ain’t a brother of mine like the Governor thought. Is he your bitch now, Darylina?”

“Shut up.” Daryl commented to his brother, and followed Ryan and Beth. 

Beth had taken off the bandage already once Daryl saw Ryan sitting on the bed while Beth was checking his wound. 

“The wound got a little deeper because of the recent events with Woodbury.” Beth said, while inspecting the wound, and cleaning it with alcohol and using the antibiotic spray. “It doesn’t seem to be infected, which is good.”

Again, Beth didn’t touch Ryan unless necessary.

“What’d happen?” Daryl asked, but only got a glare from Ryan.

“His prosthesis caused a wound in his leg, probably caused while at Woodbury.” Beth did answer Daryl. “The wound should rest.” 

Beth started wrapping up the leg again. “I’ll ask if there are any crutches left.” She got up, and went down the stairs to ask.

“How are ya holdin’ up?” Daryl asked, walking further into the cell. 

Ryan looked away, conflicting if he should talk to Daryl or not. The guy who had managed to put some cracks in his well built wall had gone without saying anything to him, and then appearing as if nothing had happened. For Ryan it felt as if he couldn’t trust Daryl anymore, especially since Ryan had thought Daryl would never leave. Daryl was so loyal to the group, and loved Lil’ Asskicker. Ryan was probably over-reacting, but it was still how he felt, and Daryl seemed to pick that up.

“Y’know. I didn’t want to leave.” Daryl started. “It always was Merle an’ me before. B’cause his actions before you came, he wouldn’t be accepted back into the group. Couldn’t leave him y’know. He’s my blood.” 

Ryan understood that, and bit his lip. He wished he had that kind of connection, if he had a brother. 

“I know, but it still hurt…” Ryan spilled. “I trusted you.”

“Not anymore?”

Ryan didn’t know, so pulled up his shoulders.

“You have big trust issues, y’know.” Daryl said, Ryan almost offended, but saw the look Daryl had on his face, which wasn’t offending or insulting. “We can work on that, the group is trustworthy.”

“I know.”

“Then why are you holding back so much?”

Ryan sighed, and started to spill parts of his story. “I was with a group before… Thought I could trust them after a few months. Turned out I couldn’t, and bad shit happened.” 

Daryl listened. “What did they do?”

Looking at Daryl, Ryan opened his mouth. “They harassed me, beat me up eventually, after finding out I was gay. They… They drugged me by using an IV, and while my body went numb, but my mind didn’t, they raped me… Saying it would prove to me how being gay is a bad choice.”

Ryan tried to keep a poker face, but tears in his eyes betrayed him.

“Ryan…”

“No, listen.” Ryan had more to tell. “After a few times of group rape, they put me in a familiar situation as back at Woodbury. Only I was alone, and Walkers came almost running for me. They had put me into a gap with these. It was kill or be killed.” Ryan shakingly inhaled before continuing. “I killed all these Walkers barehanded. After that, I got out of the gap, and started taking out my anger on the group, got hurt, and fled. Running for days, when I found a farm. That’s when I met you guys.”

“Ryan…” Beth said, having arrived already, with sadness in her voice. “I’m so sorry that happened…”

“It explains a lot,” Rick was next to Beth. 

Daryl, still next to Ryan, was silent, and didn’t even look at Ryan anymore. “That’s heavy man…” Daryl didn’t know what to say anymore. 

“Do the others know of this?” Beth asked, but Ryan shook his head.

“No… It’s the first time I’ve trusted anyone with this. Wasn’t sure how you guys would react… Especially since I feel a bit at home with you guys...”

Beth smiled. “You’re family, Ryan. We accept you as you are.” She walked over to him and put her hand on his knee. Ryan flinched, but didn’t pull away from Beth. “We’ll protect you, be there for you in hard times.”

“You’re important, Ryan. You’ve saved us many times.” Rick said, also stepping into the cell. 

A tear falled across Ryan his cheek, before he looked up and smiled. “Thank you.”

Daryl smiled, and also put a hand on Ryan his knee, on top of Beth’s. “Tough motherfucker.”

That last comment made Ryan smile weakly. “Just don’t tell anyone yet…”

The tree did agree to that, keeping Ryan’s history with groups a secret for the others. 

“Now, we have something here for you.” Rick said, grabbing the crutches from the ground, they had been dropped as Ryan had told his story. 

Ryan accepted the crutches, and stood up. He still remembered how to even his balance, so he didn’t fall. 

“Looks like we are lucky.” Rick said. “They do seem to be perfect for you height.”

Ryan nodded. “They are.”

Rick smiled, and patted Ryan on the shoulder, causing Ryan to flinch again. “Keep it up.” Rick walked out of the cell to mind his own business. 

“I’m proud of you!” Beth cheered, while Daryl hummed in approval. 

“Thanks, I guess…” Ryan said, feeling a bit awkward. 

Beth smiled. “Like I said, you’re family.”

 

Beth left after a while, to watch Judith. She asked if Ryan and Daryl wanted to come, but Ryan refused, not ready to meet the baby yet. Daryl stayed with Ryan, and Carol joined the two.

“Haven’t got the chance to say I’m glad you came back.” She started, standing against the wall while Daryl played with an arrow from his crossbow. 

Daryl snorted. “To what? All this?” He pointed his arrow slightly around. 

“This is our home.” Carol said.

“This is a tomb.” 

“That’s what T-Dog called it.” Carol looked at the ceiling. “Thought he was right, until the two of you found me.”

For a second, Daryl’s mouth turned into a small smile, before returning to his usual frown.

“He’s your brother.” Carol continued talking, but a different subject this time. “But he isn’t good for you. Don’t let him bring you down. After all look how far you've come.”

Daryl looked around, and snorted again. 

Ryan just looked at the two laughing. 

“I heard what happened, from before the Outbreak.” Carol said to Ryan. “It explains a lot. But I’m glad you said it.”

Ryan knew what Carol was talking about, and wanted to look away, close up again. Instead he decided to just listen to what Carol had to say.

“You’re strong.” Carol continued. “If you ever want to talk about it any further, let me know. I’ll listen.”

Ryan nodded. “Thanks Carol. It’s just… Hard to talk about it.”

“I know, Ryan. I know.” Carol her face saddened. 

Observing, Ryan noticed the change in her face. 

“You’re from a familiar situation like me, aren’t you?”

“Her husband used to abuse her and her daughter.” Daryl filled in for Carol. “Bastard’s dead now.”

Ryan still looked at Carol. “You had a daughter?”

“Sophia.” Carol said. “She got missing a while before you came along. Turned out she was bitten and put in the barn at Hershel’s farm.”

Carol didn’t want to dig deeper at the moment. 

Ryan nodded, he understood. 

“Daryl, Carol! We need you!” Rick shouted, and sounded rushed. “Grab a gun, and come with me!”

Carol and Daryl did what they were told, and rushed after Rick. 

Ryan grabbed his crutches, and went after them. Before he had made it out of the cell block, Rick had brought a captive inside with him, while the others followed him. Carol came down from the watch bridge, and hugged the captive; Andrea.

Everyone involved had guns, even Merle and Michonne. Hershel came to the common area too.

“After you saved me, I thought you were dead.” Carol muttered.

Andrea didn’t react, and noticed Ryan and Hershel on crutches, both missing a part of their legs. 

“Hershel, Ryan… Oh my God.” Andrea said, while looking around and letting Carol go. “I can’t believe this… Where is Shane?” She looked at Rick, who didn’t answer. “And Lori?”

“She had a girl.” Hershel spoke up. “Lori didn’t survive.”

“Neither did T-Dog.” Maggie added.

“I’m so sorry.” Andrea whispered, still looking around, until she spotted Carl. “Carl…”

Carl looked at her with a straight face, as if she was an enemy.

“Rick, I…” Andrea turned to Rick again, but he still avoided her.

“You all live here?” Andrea asked.

“Here in the cell block.” Glenn answered. 

“There?” Andrea pointed at the entrance of cell block C. “Can I go in?” She started walking to the door.

“I can’t allow that.” Rick said, blocking her way.

“I’m not an enemy, Rick.” Andrea said in defence.

“We had that field, courtyard, until your boyfriend tore down the fence with a truck and shot us up.” Rick’s face was cold.

“He said you fired first.” Andrea said, disbelieving the story Rick just told her.

“He’s lying.” Ryan said, causing everyone to turn to him. “He killed an inmate who survived in here.”

“We liked him.” Daryl added, glaring at Andrea. “He was one of us.” 

“I didn’t know anything about that.” Andrea shook her head. “As soon as I found out, I came here. I didn’t even know you were in Woodbury until after the shoot out.”

“That was days ago.” Glenn said, his face was also cold. 

“I told you, I came as soon as I could.” Andrea said, and a short silence fell, until she turned to Michonne. “What have you told them?”

“Nothing.” Michonne said calmly. 

“I don’t get it. After we left Atlanta with you people, and now I am out?”

“He almost killed Michonne, and he would have killed us.” Glenn said. 

“With his finger on the trigger!” Andrea pointed at Merle. “Isn’t he the one that kidnapped you?! Who beat you?!” Andrea sighed. “Look, I can’t excuse or explain what Philip has done. But I’m here, trying to bring us together. We have to work this out.”

“There is nothing to work out.” Rick said. “We’re gonna kill him. I don’t know how, or when, but we will.”

“We can settle this.” Andrea spoke in disbelief. “There is room at Woodbury for all of you.”

Merle laughed. “You know better than that.” 

“What makes you think this man wants to negotiate.” Hershel spoke. “Did he say that?”

“No.” Andrea wounded beat.

“Then why did you come here?” Rick asked, still cold. 

“Because he’s getting up for war.” Andrea was back in the game, so it seemed. “The people are terrified, they see you as killers. They are training to attack.”

“I tell you what,” Daryl began. “Next time you see Phillip, tell him Imma take his other eye.”

“We’ve taken this shit for too long. If he wants war, he got one.” Glenn spoke. 

“Rick.” Andrea turned to Rick, again. “If you don’t sit down, and try to work this out, I don’t know what’s gonna happen. He has a whole town.” Andrea turned around to look at the others around her. “Look at you. You’ve lost so much already. You can’t stand alone anymore.”

“You wanna make this right, get us inside.” Rick said. 

“No.” Andrea said. 

Immediately Rick walked past her. “Then we’re done.”

“There are innocent people there!”

Rick didn’t stop from walking, leaving everyone. 

Ryan hopped to Daryl, while Andrea grabbed his arm. “What happened?” She asked, concerning his leg. 

“Let him go.” Daryl growled, while Ryan gave the woman a glare. 

“Not until I get answers.”

“You shouldn’t touch him, unless you want to die.” Carl said, walking towards the three. “I’m serious.”

Andrea let go of Ryan, and Ryan sat down at the table where Daryl sat. 

“So?” Andrea asked. “I let you go, I want answers.”

“You know…” Ryan started. “I want things too, but sometimes you can’t have it. Deal with it.”

“Ugh, I now remember why I didn’t like you.” Andrea said, and stormed off, leaving Ryan with a grin on his face. 

 

Eventually Andrea left. Ryan did watch it with a grin on his face, and a rifle in his hands, watching from the bridge that connected prison parts. 

It had gotten dark, and Beth had lit some candles in the prison. Everyone was silent, until Rick came down with Judith. 

Beth had started singing again, with her angelic voice, calming the air, but Ryan tensed up because of the baby. 

He grabbed Daryl’s arm, who stood next to him with Hershel, and hid a bit behind him, not wanting to get aggressive again.

Daryl looked at Ryan because of the sudden touch, but allowed it, also Daryl didn’t like it to be touched.

While Beth sang, Glenn sat next to Maggie on the stairs, and Rick slowly moved to stand next to Hershel and Daryl. 

Both Daryl and Hershel looked over to the little baby in Rick’s arms. 

“Some reunion, huh?” Daryl commented. 

“She’s in the jam.” Rick spoke, only removing his sight from Judith for a second. 

“We all are.” Hershel spoke too. “Andrea is convincing.”

“He’s armed to the teeth.” Ryan said, remembering the shootout, and the Walker pit. “Out for destruction…”

“What you wanna do?” Daryl asked. 

“Match it.” Rick said, looking up from Judith again. “I’m going on a run.”

“I’ll go tomorrow.” Daryl said.

“No, you stay here, keep an eye on your brother.” Rick argued. “Glad you’re back. Really. If he causes a problem, it’s on you.”

“Got ‘m.” Daryl answered.

“I’ll take Michonne.” Rick said. 

“Sure that’s a good idea?”

“I’ll find out. And Carl. He’s ready. You hold it down here.”

Daryl nodded. “You got it.”

Judith started to get fussy, and Ryan tensed up. “Daryl…”

“It’s okay, Ryan…” Rick said. “You’re doing great…”

Ryan rested his head against Daryl’s back. “Help me…”

His plea was just a whisper, but Daryl had heard it. Together they went outside for a bit, to catch some fresh air, and to ease the tension Ryan had. 

“You doin’ better?” Daryl asked, after they had settled down on a bench in the courtyard. 

Ryan put his crutches next to him and nodded. “Yeah…”

“You did good.” Daryl said, rubbing Ryan’s head.  

No answer, but Ryan did lean against Daryl. Both accepted the touch, and kept like this. 

“Daryl…” Ryan muttered. “Do you think I’m filthy?”

“No.” Daryl didn’t have to think long to answer that question. What Daryl felt for Ryan was different. “Look at me…”

Ryan looked up, to be met with lips on his. 

Daryl had leaned towards Ryan to kiss him, and surprisingly Ryan didn’t pull back, but accepted the kiss. 

Ryan, who had accepted the kiss, did feel a bit of panic rising. What if Daryl wanted to take advantage of him? Daryl noticed the body next to him tensing up, and slowly broke the kiss. 

Looking away, Ryan turned red. “I… You…” Not knowing what words to use, Ryan had spoken.

As if Daryl knew what Ryan wanted to say. “I like you, Ryan. I really do, and I would never want to hurt you…” 

Ryan knew Daryl was honest, which eased him. 

“I like you… Too…” Slowly Ryan got closer to Daryl again, and kissed him again. 

The both of them didn’t know Carl was outside too, and saw the two of them being intimate. Carl smiled, before returning to his own business. 

Ryan hadn’t felt like this in a long, long time, and actually felt his jeans getting a bit tighter at his crotch. 

“Fuck…” Ryan breathed as the kiss broke. 

Daryl snorted. “Happened to me too…” 

Once Ryan saw Daryl’s bulge, Ryan grew as red as a tomato. “L-let’s go inside…”

Daryl liked where this was going, and picked Ryan up, since he still couldn’t walk. “This is quicker…”

Ryan grinned, and Daryl got them both inside. 

 

Daryl had set Ryan down on his bed, while Daryl checked if anyone was awake.

“Everyone’s asleep.” Daryl grinned. “Glenn has watch. We have to be really quiet.”

Daryl got inside and closed up the door. 

“Where were we?” Ryan smiled. “I think I remember. Come here, pretty man.”

Quickly Daryl came over, and started kissing Ryan again. 

“Tell me… Tell me if we should stop…” Daryl huffed, softly caressing Ryan’s jaw. 

Ryan swallowed, and nodded. 

“We’re going your pace, you can take the control.” Daryl eased Ryan, and kissed him again before pulling him on his lap. 

Instinctively, Ryan started to grind Daryl slowly, with eyes half closed. For the first time it felt right to do these things. 

“Daryl…” Ryan whispered. “I… I want… you…”

Slowly Ryan stripped from his shirt, feeling very exposed. Daryl did the same, not feeling fear for exposing his scars to Ryan, since Ryan had a lot too. 

Daryl’s eyes traveled over Ryan his body, and he slowly started to explore the skin with his hands. Slowly, Daryl laid down, and watched how Ryan kept grinding his groin, with a tomato red face. Daryl wanted him to go further, wanting Ryan to ride him until he forgot his own name, but it was Ryan’s pace, and he respected that. 

Ryan unbuckled his trousers, and dropped them a bit, together with his underwear. “C-can I?” He asked.

Daryl nodded, and thrust his head into the mattress beneath him as Ryan undid his pants. 

“Wow…” Ryan commented after seeing Daryl’s length. “You’re huge.”

Grinning, Daryl positioned himself more comfortable. “You’re not small either.”

Ryan softly smiled, and grabbed the two lengths together. “Compared to you, I am.”

Feeling the friction of Daryl’s dick on his, made him shudder, and slowly Ryan started thrusting into his hand and against Daryl’s dick. 

“Fuck,” Daryl softly groaned. “Go on…”

Ryan, feeling confident about what he was doing, kept thrusting. Slow and softly, Daryl added his left hand to cover Ryan’s hand, and also thrust a bit himself. Daryl’s right hand traveled to Ryan’s butt, and he softly pinched in it. 

“Aah!” Ryan arched his back, trying to keep his voice down. “Daryl…”

In the meanwhile Daryl had closed his eyes, and felt his coil tightening. It had been a long time since he had gone off, so it didn’t take much for him now, and it seemed the same thing for Ryan; Also Ryan had closed his eyes, and started leaking some pre-cum. 

“I’m close…” Ryan huffed whispering. 

“Hm…” Daryl groaned, being close himself. 

For some reason, the both of them came together, shooting the milky fluid over Daryl’s chest. 

Both remained in their positions, to catch their breath. Ryan reached for the unused blanket on the top bunk, and started wiping Daryl’s stomach clean. 

The two of them just stared into each other's eyes, taking in the moment, and tucking their junk back into their pants, before Ryan laid down next to Daryl. 

“Thank you…” Ryan spoke, leaning onto Daryl’s chest. 

Daryl didn’t answer, and softly started to stroke Ryan’s hair, until the both of them fell asleep.

 

The next morning, Rick, Carl and Michonne were up early for the run, and had long left before Ryan and Daryl woke up, both on the opposite sides of the bed.

Closing his eyes, Ryan took in the moment before being disturbed by Carol. 

“Good morning sleepy heads. It’s time to get up.” She said, with a small smile. “Breakfast is ready, if you take too long it’s gone.” 

Daryl grunted, and pulled Ryan closer. “Go ‘way...” 

Carol laughed. “Okay guys. Just this time I’ll bring some. But you know we have extra blankets now, no need to keep each other warm during the night.” Carol had noticed the two did get close to sleep during the months between the fall of the farm and the find of the prison. It wasn’t strange, considering most of the people cuddled up to each other during those months. 

“Forgot that…” Ryan muttered, and rubbed his eyes. 

As soon as Carol had left, Daryl softly kissed Ryan’s neck. “G’mornin’...”

“Hmmm.” Ryan answered, having his eyes closed again. 

“Y’know… Last night was the best night…” Daryl muttered. 

The memories of the night before shot through Ryan his mind, and grew as red as a tomato again. 

“We… We should do that more…” Was the only thing Ryan managed to speak out. 

“Agree.” Daryl muttered, keeping Ryan close.

All was fine, until the sound of Judith crying echoed through the cellblock. 

Ryan tensed up, wanting to get out of bed, only to be restrained by Daryl. 

“It’s only Lil’ Asskicker…” Daryl said, keeping a close eye on Ryan. “I got you.”

Taking deep breaths, Ryan slowly calmed. 

Carol came back with breakfast. “Here you go.”

Daryl sat up, and accepted the food. “Thanks.”

Ryan followed his example, quickly put his shirt on, and tasted the food. 

“Eat up, and get ready.” Carol got back to her duty.

Daryl passed Ryan a plate, and both ate in silence. 

“It’s better to keep it a secret.” Ryan spoke. “Don’t want the same thing to happen…”

As Ryan spoke, Daryl looked up, knowing exactly what Ryan meant. 

“It won’t happen.” Daryl spoke. “The group doesn’t do that kind of stuff.”

“Still.” Ryan said. “Better safe than sorry…”

Ryan ate a few more bites, before giving the plate to Daryl. “I’m full. You should eat.”

Daryl didn’t argue with Ryan, and ate up before putting a shirt on himself too. 

Wanting to get up, Ryan looked around the cell for his crutches.

“Looking for these?” Ryan looked up to see Maggie standing against the door opening. “You left them outside yesterday. Carl brought them in.”

“Ah, thanks.” Ryan said, reaching out to accept the crutches. 

Maggie looked at Ryan, and how he got up. “Do you have a lot of pain?”

“No.” Ryan answered. “The wound is healing well, I guess. I’ll let Beth look at it in the afternoon.”

“Good.” Maggie smiled. “I’ll take the dishes down.”

Maggie collected the empty plates, and left.

“Come.” Daryl said, and followed Maggie.

Not knowing what Daryl was up to, Ryan followed him down to the common area.

“Sit.” Daryl said. “I’ll be back soon.”

Sitting down, Ryan looked around, seeing Carol and Beth do the dishes while Glenn kept a close watch on Ryan. 

Daryl came back, with a fussy Judith in his arms.

“What is the meaning of this? Daryl, we’ve discussed this!” Glenn spat, and stood in front of Ryan. “Remember what he did?”

“I’m here to make sure it goes right.” Daryl said, walking past Glenn. 

Ryan, sitting there frozen of fear, trembled a bit. 

“You can do it, Ryan.” Beth sat next to Ryan. Ryan hadn’t even noticed her move. “I believe in you.” This gave Ryan some confidence.

Reaching for his knife, which Ryan always had on him lately, Ryan spoke. “Glenn…”

Glenn turned around, to see the knife in Ryan his hand. Being alarmed, Glenn pushed Daryl with Judith further from Ryan. 

“Glenn, take the knife.” Ryan said. “At least I can’t stab her if you have my knife.”

Stepping towards Ryan, Glenn got the knife from him, feeling a bit more safe for Judith. It’s not like Glenn disliked Ryan, but they both knew Ryan was highly unstable when it came to babies. 

“Beth…” Ryan said. “Keep an eye on me, okay?”

Everyone involved in the room felt anxious, but also proud of Ryan for taking a big step, even though Daryl almost forced him.  

“I’m ready.” Ryan said, opening his arms to receive the baby.

Daryl walked closer, and gently handed the girl over to Ryan, who received as gently as Daryl was. 

“Make sure to support her head.” Beth adjusted Ryan his posture.

Judith, who was fussy at first, did calm a bit, noticing she was being held by someone she didn’t know yet. The two of them made eye contact for a bit, before Ryan called Beth. 

“Beth… Beth!” Ryan felt his panic coming up, and Beth noticed that in his voice, acting quickly and getting the baby from Ryan’s arms. 

“You did great.” Maggie said, sitting next to the other side of Ryan. “We’re really proud of you.”

Ryan felt emotionally drained, but was proud of his first step. 

“Told ya it would go right.” Daryl said, elbowing Glenn.

“Yeah…” Glenn said with a little smile on his face, giving Ryan his knife back. “Say… Daryl. Are you and…?”

“Not a word.” Daryl didn’t let Glenn finish his sentence. “‘M not gay…” 

Ryan snickered a bit at Daryl turning red at Glenn’s question. 

“It would be okay if you were.” Glenn said in defense.

“But I’m not, so shut it.” Daryl hissed, and walked away, to the yard.

Ryan grabbed his crutches, and followed Daryl. 

“Do you believe him?” Glenn asked Maggie.

“Nah, they’re growing on each other.” She smiled. “Ryan is so into Daryl.”

“I think it’s cute.” Beth said, still holding Judith. “Ryan and Daryl would make a cute couple.”

“But Daryl said he’s not gay.” Carol said. “Just let this case rest before they find out we’ve been talking about this.”

 

“Are you upset?” Daryl asked once Ryan was outside. “‘Cause I said I’m not gay?”

Ryan shook his head, while getting to the picnic tables where Daryl sat. “No. It’s better if they don’t know.”

“Yeah…” Daryl said, looking out over the field. 

Both sat in silence for a while, something the two of them didn’t feel uncomfortable with. 

What felt like minutes, were hours, until someone said something.

“Do you miss something from the life before?” Ryan suddenly asked.

“Not really…” Daryl answered. “Got everythin’ I wanted right now.” 

With questions in his eyes, Ryan looked at Daryl, who continued to speak.

“Got a family to protect now. Was just a nobody before all this.”

“Hmm…” Ryan hummed as an answer. 

“What about you?” Daryl asked, moving to face Ryan. “You miss that coach of yours?”

Ryan nodded. “Yeah… Kinda miss him. Hope he’s safe.”

Daryl listened, but nothing more came from Ryan. 

Another silence followed, until Beth came to Ryan. 

“Ryan,” She said while approaching him. “How’s your leg?”

“Doesn’t hurt…” Ryan answered, lifting his leg. 

“Let’s let it air for a while.” Beth said. “Might do some good to it.”

Beth reached out for Ryan his leg, but Ryan flinched visibly when she got close.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” Beth said. “I’m only going to take the bandages off, and wash them, okay?”

Ryan nodded, and undid the bandages himself. Beth observed Ryan while he unwrapped his leg. The wound hadn’t opened up, and actually looked clean. 

“Looks good.” Beth said with a smile. “You should be able to wear your prosthesis in a few days again.”

Nodding, Ryan handed over the bandages.

“Hey, Ryan.” Beth said before returning inside. “I’m really proud of you.”

Not knowing what to say or do, Ryan just looked at Beth, opening his mouth to say something. Luckily for him, Beth had turned around and went inside again before he got the chance to say something. 

“It’s true. Kinda threw ya into the deep just now.” Daryl said. 

Ryan nodded. “You did… But it went good…”

Daryl couldn’t agree more, and nudged Ryan’s arm. “Big Asskicker.”

“Fuck you.” Ryan hit Daryl back with his fist, but cracked a smile. 

 

The next day, Rick went to talk to the Governor, and took Daryl with him as gunman, and Hershel as driver. Glenn instructed the group back at the prison to fortify their position, ordering Ryan to put some ammo on watch points. Putting the ammunition in his bag, Ryan hobbled outside, also keeping his baseball bat strapped to his bag, just in case, and started dropping the ammo on the places he got ordered to. 

“You think my dad will be fine?” Carl asked, following Ryan point to point. He was worried because of the words Merle spoke about Rick before. About Rick’s head being on a spike real soon. 

“Rick is tough. He’ll manage.” Ryan answered, checking the scopes of the guns at the watch points. 

“But the Governor, he’s scary.” 

“Believe me, your father can be scary too.” Ryan said, setting the rifle down.

Carl chuckled at that. 

“Do you think they’ll work stuff out?” Carl continued to ask. 

“Honestly?” Ryan looked at Carl. “I don’t think they’ll do.”

“How do you know?”

Ryan sighed. “I just know. C’mon.”

Both went back inside, to see Merle and Glenn in a fight. 

Feeling irritated, Ryan grabbed his baseball bat, and started to shout.

“Both of you, get on your fucking feet!” Ryan never raised his voice since he was in the group, even when irritated. 

The sudden explosion of Ryan’s behavior caused the two to look up, and Maggie took her chance to grab Merle by the neck when he continued to fight. Even Beth shot a gun to get the attention, and to make clear the fight was over. 

“Fucking maniac…” Ryan commented on Merle who shouted to be released, and walked away, off to his cell to put on his prosthesis again. 

“The wound isn’t completely healed.” Carl said, who kept following Ryan around. 

“I’m putting my pants in the prosthesis, it won’t cut like last time.” Ryan said in defense. “Plus, I’m tired of not being able to walk normally.”

“If you feel pain, you should remove it!” Carl was concerned, Ryan could see it on his face. 

“Don’t worry about it, okay?”

Carl nodded, and quickly stepped out of the cell after Carol called for him. The two of them had watch for a bit.

“We plannin’ on takin’ him out.” Merle’s voice suddenly said. Ryan had heard him coming, but didn’t bother to look up.

“So?” Ryan said, not very interested.

“Ya with us?”

“‘Us’?” Ryan raised an eyebrow. 

“Michonne an’ me.” Merle stepped into the cell.

“That’s close enough.” Ryan said before Merle came too close. 

“Don’t trust me, huh?” Merle leaned against the wall, 

“Nobody.” Ryan said with a blank face. 

The smirk Merle had disappeared from his face. “How about Darylina?”

Ryan rolled his eyes. “Get to your point.”

“If ya join, we’ll have more chance to hit him.”

“If I join, there would be more chance for stray bullets to fly around.”

“I’m willing to take that chance. Offers have to be made, even if it is for a little gay guy like you.”

“Get out. Now.” Ryan hissed. He didn’t want Merle close to him. 

“C’mon, ya can get to join us, I’m sure.” Merle tried to convince Ryan.

“Ya heard the guy, get out.” Daryl suddenly said, and entered the cell. He, Hershel and Rick were back. 

Merle put his arms up in defense, and left the cell. 

“Asshole.” Daryl muttered, and walked after him. 

Shortly after, the group got summoned by Rick.

“So I met this Governor.” Rick started, having a rifle in his hand. “Sat with him for quite a while.”

“Just the two of ya?” Merle asked.

Rick nodded. “Yeah.”

“We had to go when we had the chance.” Merle walked out, talking to Glenn for stopping him when he wanted to go and kill the Governor.

Rick wasn’t affected by Merle, and continued talking. “He wants the prison, he wants us gone. Dead. He wants us dead.”

Merle turned around and listened to what Rick had to say, while the others hadn’t moved yet. 

“For what we did in Woodbury.” Rick looked at everyone circling around him. “We’re going to war.” And with that, Rick walked out, and all the others minded their own business. 

Daryl gave Ryan a nod, and after that stared at Merle, who stared back. 

Hershel followed Rick to outside, and stayed there for a while. 

After a while, Daryl got summoned by Rick, and as his right-hand man, Daryl followed. 

Ryan figured out they must have a big issue, if Rick needs to talk to both Hershel and Daryl.


	5. Taking action

Two days had passed since Rick spoke to the Governor.

Sighing, Ryan walked towards the stairs after having a watch shift, and noticed Merle ripping up mattresses in some unused cells. 

Ryan rolled his eyes. Merle was probably looking for drugs, so ignoring Merle, Ryan went up to his cell, and laid down on his bed for a bit. 

The side most to the wall smelled like Daryl, so he got close to that part. 

After a while, footsteps were heard, and Merle started talking to the person approaching, but none of it stood out to Ryan, until the other person started talking.

“We need your help.”

 

Ryan heard everything. How Rick planned to hand Michonne over to the Governor, and Ryan didn’t know how to feel towards Rick. Was Rick so easy to manipulate?

After Rick had left, Ryan got up, and ran to Daryl, who was outside, just done with setting up traps.

“You knew this?” Ryan asked, catching his breath. “About her?”

“You’re not supposed to know.” Daryl answered, grabbing Ryan’s arm and bringing him to a more private place.

“Then Rick should have checked if all cells were empty. Now answer.” Ryan was angry at Rick for not saying this matter in the group. The group would be able to discuss a solution. 

Knowing Ryan had a point, Daryl spoke. “If we hand her over, Woodbury w…”

“I heard about that.” Ryan interrupted Daryl. “So if my former group suddenly showed up, if they were alive, Rick would hand me over too?! What is going on in his mind?!” Ryan his thoughts flashed through his head, and had spilled them accidently.

“This isn’t like us.” Daryl tried to ease Ryan, who clearly was distressed. “We’re not handin’ you over, if there was any of your group alive.”

“That’s all great and stuff, but what about Michonne?” Ryan asked, looking around uneasy

Daryl was quiet for a bit. “Rick wants us to have a shot.”

“A shot of what, Daryl?” Ryan was quick in his words. “Woodbury will attack no matter what!”

Daryl spotted some people getting closer to where they stood. “I don’t like it either.”

Walking to the group, Ryan followed Daryl.

“We’ve set up traps for when they come, they’ll get a flat tire before getting to the gate.” Glenn explained to Rick.

“Good idea.” Rick complimented.

“It was Michonne’s.” Daryl answered coldly, resulting in an awkward silence. 

“We don’t have to win.” Michonne said. “We just have to make their getting at us more trouble than it's worth.”

Rick remained silent, and got distracted when Carl and Maggie joined the group, including their pans and tools. Rick did make eye contact with Daryl again, and also with Ryan for a second, before walking back inside. “Let’s go.”

The group followed him, including Ryan, who looked at Rick with disgust in his eyes. 

Feeling absolutely miserable, Ryan laid in bed, again. When Beth came to check on his leg, he just sent her away, just like Carl.

Glenn was on watch, Merle and Michonne nowhere to be found, and Rick was in a hurry to find them. 

But, when Carol came to get Ryan for a group meeting, he was gone. Ryan was sure Merle was taking Michonne to Woodbury.

Nobody had seen Ryan slip out, but after looking through his cell, they concluded he must have been on his way to save Michonne; his baseball bat and gun were gone.

 

Outside, Ryan was running like a madman. Surprisingly, there weren’t much Walkers in the area, so he didn’t have to stop and kill those, nor did they catch up with him. 

Ryan knew where Michonne was brought, he had seen the map before the first trip was made, and lucky for him he had remembered it. 

On the way to the location, he noticed beheaded Walkers on the road, concluding Merle and Michonne had traveled through this road. 

Running into the feedstore courtyard, Ryan looked around. A recent shoot-out had taken place here; Walkers were eating the fresh flesh of some dead people.

“No!” Ryan heard a voice shout, and ran towards that direction. Daryl was at the same place as Ryan was, but had arrived before Ryan had, even though Ryan had left the prison earlier. Apparently, Ryan had taken a longer route to the place. 

What he found was heartbreaking. Daryl was crying, while pushing Merle away.

Ryan didn’t get why Daryl was crying, until he heard Merle groaning. 

Eyes wide, Ryan froze in his tracks. Merle had died, and became a Walker. 

Daryl tackled the Walker Merle, and repeatedly stabbing him in the head, while in tears. 

Ryan sprinted towards Daryl, dropping his weapons next to him, and hugged Daryl from behind.

Daryl was startled at first, but noticed the blond hairs that waved in the corner of his eye. He had told Michonne not to let anyone follow him, but apparently Ryan had missed her on his way here. 

Reaching back, Daryl softly grabbed Ryan’s leg, still crying. 

Ryan let go of Daryl, who wanted to protest. Before Daryl could, Ryan sat on his lap, and hugged him properly, resting his head on Daryl’s shoulder. 

After a while of quietly crying on Ryan’s shoulder, Daryl got up, carrying Ryan before putting him on the ground again. 

Ryan didn’t say a word, only looking at Daryl for any sign. 

Daryl nodded, as a sign they needed to move back to the prison, and picked up his crossbow and knife, while Ryan did the same.

Together they walked in silence back to the prison, with a little distance between the two. 

 

Once back at the prison, everyone was packing their stuff, and putting it in the silver car, while Rick was fixing another car. Ryan didn’t have much to grab, so he stuffed his backpack full with spare guns and ammunition. Daryl was outside with Merle’s bike, still quiet of all what had happened. Ryan put his bag into the trunk of a car, and even included his crutches, just in case, before going to Daryl.

“He gave us a chance.” Carol praised Merle, before helpen Daryl up.  

“Let’s go!” Rick said, and everyone went to their assigned place in this fight. 

Ryan had to go with Beth, Hershel and Carl, in the silver car.

Once outside of the prison, they covered the car with leaves and branches so it wouldn’t stand out in the woods surrounding them. 

Carl had a silenced gun, while Hershel carried a normal gun. Also Ryan had a gun; his own gun fully loaded. Beth was keeping Judith quiet in the car. 

Before they knew it, some army vehicles from Woodbury entered the prison, destroying two watch towers with a grenade thrower and a machine gun on one of the cars. 

Hershel watched the scene with big eyes, while Carl wished he was there. Ryan just watched with uninterested eyes, knowing their trap would work. 

It all got confirmed when the Woodbury resident-soldiers came out running and screaming, which got worse when Glenn and Maggie shot on them, shouting to go away, and as hoped, the soldiers fled, including the Governor.

“That’s good…” Ryan muttered when the trucks had left.

Suddenly, Carl raised his gun. 

A teen from Woodbury, armed with a gun, fled the scene, and ran right into the small group behind the car.

“Carl…” Ryan said.

“Put the gun down!” Carl shouted. 

The teen did as he was told, yet Carl shot him.

“Carl!” Ryan almost shouted. 

“I did what i had to do.” Carl said, walking back to the prison. 

Speechless, Hershel got in the car, while Ryan followed Carl to make sure he would be okay.

 

“I’m coming with you to Woodbury.” Carl said once he met his father.

“Carl…” Rick sighed.

“I did my job out there, just like you did here.” Carl said in defense. “I even killed a soldier.”

“Soldier? More like a scared child.” Ryan said. 

“He stumbled across us…” Hershel added.

“He drew on us.” Carl kept defending himself. 

“I’m sorry you had to do that.” Rick said, but Ryan felt like it wasn’t the right thing to say to Carl. 

“I just did my job.” Carl said, pulling up his shoulders as if it were nothing he just did. “I’m going with you.”

Rick watched his son walk off, not knowing what to do. 

“The kid was scared.” Hershel said to Rick. “He was handing his gun over.”

“He said he drew first.”

“Carl said it was in self-defense.” Rick said, not wanting to believe Carl had lied.

“We were there.” Hershel said.

“Carl lied.” Ryan said, glaring at Rick. “He didn’t have to shoot.”

“Maybe that’s what it looked like for you…”

“Rick!” Hershel raised his voice. “I’m telling you, he gunned that kid down.”

Hershel left the scene, while Ryan took his time to glare at Rick for a moment before leaving. 

Ryan prepared for the planned pursuit, and strapped his leg extra good. 

His bag with ammo was still in the car, unused, so Ryan got it and put it in the other car, the pick-up truck they were gonna use, and  also checked his gun, just to be sure. 

“Ya ready?” Daryl asked, appearing behind Ryan. 

“Yeah. You?”

“As ready as ever…”

Ryan nodded, and turned around to face Daryl, and kept eye contact.

“What?” Daryl felt awkward because Ryan never made much eye contact, just like he did. 

Ryan quickly grabbed the nape of Daryl’s neck, and gently brought him down.

Gently and quick, Ryan kissed Daryl on his mouth.

Daryl was surprised, but didn’t protest. Gently he reached out for Ryan’s cheek and softly caressed it. 

After the kiss parted, the two of them just looked at each other in silence, but got disturbed by Rick. 

“Guys, we need to get ready.”

Daryl followed Rick first, and Ryan followed quickly after. 

Outside, Daryl walked to Merle’s bike he was using, and bent over it for some reason. This was the perfect chance for Ryan to tap that ass. And he did. 

When Daryl looked up, he saw Ryan walking by, looking around and winking. 

Smirking, Daryl got on the bike and started it up. Ryan got in the car with Michonne. 

Glenn and maggie had proposed to stay behind in case the Governor would attack while everyone was gone. 

Rick appreciated that, and got in the car. 

Beth and Carol were killing Walkers while Glenn and Maggie opened the gate to let Daryl and the pick-up truck through. 

It was a short ride until Daryl pulled over, and Rick did too. 

Ryan hadn’t been paying attention, so when he got out, it was quite a shock to see. Three trucks of the Governor had been left behind, and Walkers littering the place. 

“What happened here?” Ryan grabbed his bat, and walked around, smashing some skulls while getting closer. 

In one of the trucks, there was a girl, slamming the window, startling Daryl. Quickly Rick raised his gun to her, while Daryl opened the door of the truck.

 

Arriving at Woodbury, a gunfight started, until Karen, the woman came out and talked. It appeared to be Tyreese and Sasha who the group was having a gunfight with. 

“He killed them all. The Governor killed them all.” Karen said. 

“What are you doing with them?!” Tyreese shouted.

“They saved me!”

“We’re coming out!” Rick shouted, but Daryl shook his head, not thinking it was a smart idea, but Rick still came out, Michonne, Daryl and Ryan following.

Tyreese and sasha came down, opening the gate of Woodbury and came out. 

“What are you doing here?” Tyreese asked.

“We were coming to finish this.” Rick spoke. “Until we saw what the Governor did.”

“He… He killed them?” Tyreese asked, almost not believing it.

“Yeah.” Rick nodded. “Karen told us Andrea was on her way to the prison. She never made it. She might be here.”

Rick led the group to the place Glenn and Maggie were being held. 

“He held them here.” Rick spoke. 

“The Governor held people here?” Tyreese asked astonished. 

“And more.” Rick said, walking further in, with his gun raised. Daryl was close on his feet with his crossbow up, while Michonne held up her gun. Ryan walked after Tyreese, making sure he wouldn’t do something stupid. 

They made it to the chamber, door closed and blood streaming from under the gap.

All hesitated to enter the room. 

“Will you open it?” Michonne asked, directed to Rick.

Daryl had his assault rifle up, just in case, and Rick opened the door, having his Colt Python up. 

In the room there was a dead Walker body, but near the door there were feet visible. 

 

“Andrea.” Michonne rushed in, and kneeled down next to her, dropping her sword in the process. 

Rick also kneeled, next to Michonne. 

Ryan got in the room too, observing. The room was dirty, with both old and fresh blood. 

“I tried to stop him…” Andrea spoke.

“You’re burning up…” Michonne said, looking at Andrea in awe. 

Andrea breathed heavy, and brought a hand up to her collar, showing a bite wound in her neck. 

Rick looked away from the sight.

“Judith, Carl, the rest of them…” Andrea started.

“Us. The rest of us.” Rick said, holding Andrea her arm, looking at her again. 

“Are they alive?”

“Yeah… They are alive.” Rick confirmed. 

Andrea smiled, and looked at Michonne. “It’s good you found them…”

Michonne nodded, trying to not break down in crying. She was having a hard time seeing her friend like this. 

“Nobody can make it alone now…”

“Never could.” Daryl said, getting closer to Ryan, softly grabbing his arm. 

“I just didn’t want anyone to die…” Andrea breathed, and after a short silence, continued. “I can do it myself.”

“No.” Michonne said defensively, knowing Andrea wanted to kill herself before turning. Tears were streaming over her face.

“I have to. While I still can.” Andrea sadly breathed. This caused Michonne to break into crying completely. 

“Please.” Andrea pleated, now to Rick. “I know how the safety works.”

Rick gave in, and gave Andrea his gun in silence.

“I’m not going anywhere.” Michonne had re-grabbed herself.

Andrea looked around the room, locking eyes with Daryl and Ryan for a moment.

“I tried.” She said.

“Yeah…” Rick breathed. “You did… You did…”

Ryan and Daryl left the room without saying a word, giving Andrea and Michonne their time.

Rick followed, closing the door. 

Tyreese was waiting quietly, and Daryl sat down, while Rick waited at the door. Ryan stood in front of Daryl, until the gunshot sounded. 

Biting his lip, Ryan looked away from the door, and went outside. Daryl had bitten his lip, and followed Ryan. 

“Ya okay?” He asked, holding Ryan’s arm. 

“Not sure…” Ryan didn’t know how he felt, standing close to Daryl. 

Daryl pulled Ryan close, needing his contact himself. Ryan rest his head against Daryl’s shoulder. 

When the others came out, both of them quickly stood apart from each other. Michonne was still in the room with the corpse of Andrea, they were sure to get her later.

In the morning, the group had returned to the farm. During the night, they had spoken to the Woodbury residents, and quite a few decided to come live at the prison, having lost faith in the Governor after hearing what happened. 

Filling a whole school bus with Woodbury residents, Tyreese drove after the group to the prison. Ryan sat on the back seat of the pick-up truck, staring over the body of Andrea, covered in sheets. It was weird how he felt, even though he didn’t have much interaction with her. Her story was just sad. 

After Glenn and Maggie had closed the fence, Rick and Michonne got out, being greeted by Hershel and Beth. Tyreese let the Woodbury ex-residents out of the bus. 

It was until Andrea’s body got buried when Ryan got out of the pick-up truck.

Daryl was the first to go to Ryan, softly grabbing his upper arm.

Ryan looked up. “I’m okay now…”

“Yeah… Me too…” Daryl spoke. 

The two of them walked to their cell, since Daryl wasn’t going to move out soon, it was now known as “their” cell. 

Daryl put the gun down in a corner, as well as his crossbow, while Ryan removed his prosthesis.

“Is the wound open again?” Daryl asked, but Ryan shook his head. 

“It’s just itchy. Besides, I wasn’t planning on doing much today.” He commented, being up all night did take a lot of energy from Ryan. 

“Sleep. You look like shit.” Daryl said, knowing Ryan was tired.

“Will you join me?” Ryan asked with a slight blush on his face. 

“Maybe later.” Daryl commented, stepping towards Ryan, kissing him on his lips for a second. 

Ryan nodded, and laid down.

“Sleep well.” Daryl said, and left the cell. 

He did fall asleep after a while, and woke up to someone crawling next to him. Opening his eyes, Ryan noticed Daryl getting next to him.

“Go back to sleep…” Daryl muttered.

“Hm…” Ryan hummed, and got a bit closer to Daryl. “I like your butt.”

Ryan suddenly blurted that out, softly pinching in Daryl’s butt, causing Daryl to grin. “Noticed.”

Kissing Ryan’s forehead, Daryl closed his eyes, ready for sleep. Ryan fell asleep shortly after. 

 

How long he had been sleeping, Ryan didn’t know, but when he woke up it was sunny and Daryl was gone. 

Stretching, Ryan sat up, grabbing his prosthesis and securing it on his leg. Walking down the stairs, Ryan got greeted by some unknown new residents.

Feeling distant, Ryan nodded as his greeting, and continued walking, until someone grabbed him by the shoulder, causing Ryan to violently shake himself loose, being prepared to hit anyone.

“Shit man, sorry!” An unknown guy said. 

“Just don’t touch me.” Ryan said, wanting to turn around and walk away again.

“I won’t. What I wanted to say… Thank you for taking us in!” The guy blurted out. 

“I didn’t do anything.” Ryan admitted.

“Still, thank you!” The guy smiled, and walked away again. 

Confused, Ryan walked towards the common space, where he found Carol. 

“Morning, sunshine.” She smiled. 

“Hi.” Ryan said, looking around him. “What’s up with these people?” Ryan sat down on a prison chair. 

“What do you mean?”

“All being nice and greeting me and stuff…” Ryan muttered.

“They’re glad we took them in.” Carol smiled, giving Ryan a plate with some food. “Daryl is out hunting, Rick and Michonne are on a run.” As if Carol knew the questions Ryan wanted to ask, she added that.

Ryan nodded and took a bite. “Where’s Beth?” Ryan needed Beth to check on his leg again. 

“She’s out, clearing the fence of Walkers.” Carol answered, also adding a glass of water in front of Ryan. “Need her to check on your leg again?”

Ryan nodded as Carol joined him on the other side of the table. “I can do it too for you?”

“No offence, but I prefer Beth.” Ryan said honestly before taking another bite.

“It’s okay.” Carol said, not feeling offended. “I’m glad you let her check.”

Ryan nodded. 

“How do you feel in the group?” Carol asked suddenly.

Ryan looked up before answering that question. “I feel at home and safe.”

That answer made Carol smile. “That’s good.”

For minutes, Ryan ate in silence, while Carol chatted with a new resident. Once Ryan was done, he got up and walked to Carol. “Thanks for the food.”

“You’re welcome.” Carol smiled.

“Can I help you with something?” Ryan suddenly asked. “Chores, dishes?”

For Carol, this came as a surprise. Rick had decided not to give Ryan any tasks, when still on the road after the farm fell. Rick felt that was the best thing to do for a guy so unsociable and scared as Ryan was.

“That would be nice, thank you.” She said. “Let’s do some dishes together.”

“Don’t we need a lot of water for that?” Ryan asked, following Carol.

“Already got some water.” Carol said. “From the pond just outside the prison. We need to filter the water by using a cloth, and after that we’ll boil it. That kills all bacteria left in the water.”

Ryan nodded, taking it all in.

Carol walks to a bucket with all dirty dishes in it, before walking outside, where the resident she spoke to before was making a fire in an old fireproof barrel. On the barrel was a grill, and on top of that was a large pot with boiling water. 

“Thank you, we get it from here.” Carol said, dismissing the resident, and handing a cloth over to Ryan. “Could you dry the dishes? I’ll wash them.”

Ryan nodded, and took the cloth. 

“Be careful, the plates are hot, be sure not to drop them.” Carol warned, and handed over the first plate. 

Ryan nodded, and noticed the plate was indeed hot, but he was able to handle it. 

After drying the plate, Ryan put it on the prison picnic table. 

“You’re doing a great job, Ryan.” Carol complimented. 

“My mother used to hit me if I didn’t.” Ryan spilled. “Don’t want the same to happen now.”

“Oh Ryan, I’m not going to hit you.” Carol said, putting her sponge down. “What your mother did to you isn’t your fault. It never was.”

Ryan looked up. “I know.”

Carol patted Ryan on the head. “You’re a great guy, you know that?”

“Hm.” Ryan pulled up his shoulders. “I’m just trying.”

Continuing the dishes, Carol stayed quiet. “How are you and Daryl doing?”

“What?” Ryan looked up.

“The two of you seem close.”

“Sort of.” Ryan admitted. 

“Do you have feelings for him?” Carol digged deeper, hoping Ryan wouldn’t close up on her.

“Daryl isn’t gay, I’m not gay. Pretty impossible.” Ryan lied. “Leave it to rest.”

And with that it was clear to Carol Ryan was closing down. 

After a silence, the two of them noticed a figure running closer to the gate. 

Maggie, who had watch, quickly opened the gate, and let the figure in. 

“Ah, Daryl’s back.” Carol said, finishing the last plate. “Looks like he has some nice meat with him.”

Ryan looked closer, and saw Daryl had several small animals strapped on his belt, and some tied to a string he had in his hand. 

“Come, let’s bring the clean dishes inside.” Carol had noticed Ryan staring at Daryl, not sure if Ryan was staring at Daryl himself, or at the meat he had brought in. 

Nodding, Ryan got the dishes, and followed Carol back inside. 

 

Since the evening was nice, the group ate outside. Daryl had helped skin the animals he had brought in, and Rick and Michonne had taken back some potatoes that someone had in their garden. The people they had raided from, died pretty recently and had their own veggie gardens, as Rick had explained. Michonne and he took the seeds they had spare, and the tools they had spare. 

“We could make our own vegetable garden. Maybe hold some livestock.” Rick said. 

This caused everyone to be in high spirits.

And even Ryan wanted to cooperate. 


	6. 30 days without accident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW in this chapter.

Six weeks. Six weeks had passed since the Woodbury residents had joined the prison. Six weeks of peaceful living. The vegetables grew well in the prison yard, and the group had managed to build a shelter for some piglets, and a shelter for a horse. The dream of livestock had come true. 

The wood used for the shelter, was also used for a teahouse idea, in the middle of the courtyard, which had a bar and several tables with chairs. Around the prison were also pots with plants to be found. 

Ryan helped occasionally with chores, helped with the livestock, and killed Walkers through the fence almost dayly. The new residents took a liking for Ryan, even though they now know he doesn’t say much, and even could be very cold towards others. When people had complained about that to Rick, Rick simply said that’s Ryan, and that Ryan went through a lot. He didn’t go into detail, but the residents did came to accept him.

Some kids had actually asked Ryan to come and decorate the prison walls with chalk. At first Ryan hesitated, because of his trauma, but knew Beth would be there too, since the kids asked her too, so he went and decorated the walls too.

In the distance, Daryl had seen it, deciding it must be the best time of Ryan’s life to live like this. Occasionally Ryan had held Judith under supervision, and all times it went good. 

Rick had developed more trust in Ryan, leaving him with some tasks without supervision. Ryan occasionally helped Hershel with planting seeds, or removing weeds, helped Glenn and Maggie at the fence, and helped Carol cooking and cleaning. 

When it got announced there were enough cloths to cover the cell doors for more privacy, Ryan had been the first to volunteer to put them up, and Daryl knew why. 

The showers were up and running too, even though you had to pump water to use it, it was a huge improvement. After the first shower he had taken in months, Ryan felt so fresh and clean, especially since Michonne had brought shower gel with her on a run. The greasy, dirty blond hair Ryan used to have, now was shiny, clean and almost gold, and all body smell was gone. Carol also had washed his clothes, and even though some stains didn’t come out, it smelled like new. 

“Ya smell good.” Daryl had commented when Ryan walked past him. “Here, found this.”

Daryl handed over a hairband.

Ryan accepted it, and put his hair into a bun. “Thanks…”

“Now I can see your face properly.” Daryl smiled, and continued doing what he was doing. 

It was true, Ryan’s hair had grown so long, it had surpassed his shoulders, and usually was in the way of his face. 

  
  


“Morning Daryl, Ryan.” Ryan and Daryl walked into the “teahouse” to get some food from Carol, who had the “bar service”, and cooked breakfast.

“Hey doctor S!” Daryl answered, walking straight to the bar, grabbing a bowl with food. Ryan did the same. 

“Mornin’ Daryl.” “Hey Daryl!” Several others greeted Daryl, which caused him to look back.

“Smells good.” Ryan and Daryl said at the same time to Carol, who laughed.

“So you know, Daryl.” She began. “I liked you first.”

“Stop.” Daryl said, putting a piece of food in his mouth. “Y’know, Rick brought a lot in too.”

“Not recently.” Carol spoke. “Give a stranger sanctuary, keeping people fed, then you have to live with the love.”

“Right.” Daryl chewed, and looked around.

“I need you to see something,” Carol continued. “Patrick, can you take over?”

“Yes ma’am.” Patrick said, adjusting his glasses. 

Carol walked away, Daryl wanting to follow her, but got stopped by Patrick.

“Mister Dixon?” Patrick said, causing Daryl to stop in his tracks. “I just wanted to thank you for bringing that deer back yesterday. It was a real treat, sir, and I’d be honored to shake your hand.” Patrick held out his hand. 

Daryl took a moment to process what Patrick had said, sucked the breakfast off his fingers, and shook Patrick’s hand.

The comment of ‘Mister Dixon’ caused Ryan to snicker softly, but the finger sucking and not wiping it off (and seeing Patrick’s reaction) caused Ryan to smirk.

“You think it’s funny?” Daryl grinned to the smirking Ryan, something he hadn’t seen in a long while.

Ryan nodded, while snickering a last bit. Daryl shook his head, and followed Carol. 

While the two of them spoke, Ryan looked over the fences. The entrance had been renewed, with strong iron doors you could open and close from the inside, and alongside the entrance were sharp wooden spears, so Walkers would be pierced if they were close to the door when it opened. 

Taking another bite, Ryan noticed the lot of Walkers got bigger and bigger, and the fence had trouble holding them back. Later this day he would kill more to relieve the fence a bit, hoping the flow of Walkers would become less.

 

Daryl got ready for a run, while Ryan took care of Walkers at the fence, together with Karen, Sasha and some others. Carol was going to hold a storytelling again today in the library, so the kids were busy too.

“Take care of that side…” Ryan instructed Sasha. “Karen, take the others and go to the other side of the watch tower. We have to work spreaded out.”

Karen and the others nodded, and ran to the other side of the watch tower. 

“Try to get as many as you can!” Sasha added.

Ryan put on the special assigned apron, grabbed his knife, and started to stab the Walkers at the fence. 

“When will these Walkers stop approaching?” Sasha asked herself, out loud.

“The day that will happen is the day the last living human has died…” Ryan said, stabbing a Walker in the eye. “As long as we can keep this up, the fence won’t give in…”

“True…” Sasha said. “You’re good with children, aren’t you?” She changed the topic. 

“No.” Ryan said, getting a little tensed. 

“Don’t lie,” Sasha laughed. “I saw you with the kids. They love you.”

“Can we change topics?” Ryan asked, stabbing the Walkers with more aggression than before, but Sasha didn’t notice, and continued talking. 

“Some say you’re like a big brother to them.”

“Stop!” Ryan almost shouted, and was trembling. “Change topics or shut up.”

Sasha was startled by this, but remembered what Rick had told her. “Sorry.”

Ryan didn’t respond, and kept killing Walkers to get rid of his aggression. 

After a while of killing in silence, Carl came running. “Ryan! I need to talk to you!”

Looking up, Ryan saw Carl, and put away his knife after wiping it off on the apron. “Can you handle it, Sasha?”

“Got it!” She responded. 

Ryan put away the apron and got to the other side of the fence to face Carl.

“What’s up?” Ryan asked. 

“Can’t say it here, come with me.” Carl ran away, and Ryan followed, not knowing what Carl wanted. 

Carl went to cellblock C, and got up the stairs, heading to Ryan and Daryl’s cell. 

“Carl, why do we have to be in my cell? Can’t you just tell it?” Ryan asked, stepping into the neat cell.

“Carol is teaching the kids how to use a knife during storytelling!” Carl blurted out.

This wasn’t what Ryan expected. “Wait. Are you sure?”

“Yeah, she even asked me not to tell my father.”

“Come, sit down.” Ryan said, and sat down himself.

Carl followed Ryan’s advice, and sat down next to him. “I don’t get it.”

“This information isn’t exactly old information to me too.” Ryan said. “Look, it’s good you came to me, but what do you expect me to do?”

“Nothing, I guess…” Carl admitted, looking at the floor. “Just needed it off my chest.”

Ryan nodded. “I don’t think it’s a bad thing she teaches the kids how to use a knife.”

“Why?” Carl looked up.

“These kids grow up, sooner or later they need to know how to defend themselves.” Ryan spoke. “Daryl had to teach me how to use a knife, because I didn’t know how to use it, remember?”

Carl nodded. “You’re right.”

Ryan smiled lightly. “When am I not.”

Carl burst out in laughing.

“Come on. Wanna help kill some Walkers?” Ryan stood up.

“Hell yeah!” Carl quickly followed Ryan. “Let’s make it a game. Who kills the most Walkers, wins.”

“Deal.” Ryan said. 

Carl stormed off to the fences to get the best weapon. 

“Apron, Carl!” Ryan shouted after Carl, putting an apron on himself. 

Carl sighed, and got back to put an apron on. 

“Sasha, Carl’s going to take over, you can go if you want.” Ryan offered. 

“But I wanna stay.” Sasha said. 

“Then you stay.” Ryan shot back, and stabbed a Walker in the brain. “Extra hands are always welcome.”

Carl came running, this time with apron.

“Got one already, can you keep up?” Ryan said, stabbing another Walker. “Two.”

“Show off.” Carl grinned, and started killing Walkers himself. 

 

It had gotten dark when Ryan and Daryl spoke again. 

“Hey…” Daryl said, a bit distanced when he stepped into their cell. 

“What’s up?” Ryan asked, being concerned, and got up from the bed. 

“Just had to give Beth the bad news.” Daryl said. “Zach died on the run.”

“How did she take it?” Ryan asked, removing his vest. 

“Nonchalant…” Daryl said. “Almost as if she didn’t care.”

Ryan inhaled, and softly pressed himself against Daryl. “I’m sorry…”

“Hmmm.” Daryl ran his hand over Ryan’s back. “Missed ya…”

“I did miss you too…” Ryan muttered, unbuttoning Daryl’s shirt. 

“First time since we put up the door cloth, hm?” Daryl smirked, and helped Ryan get out of his clothes. 

“If you feel like it…” Ryan said, standing up his toes to kiss Daryl, and shoved the shirt off Daryl’s chest. 

“Hell yeah…” Daryl put Ryan’s shirt over his head, and discarded it somewhere on the ground. 

Both were undoing their belts, and dropped their pants. 

Ryan grasped at seeing Daryl’s bulge in his underwear, and blushed a bit. 

Daryl came closer to Ryan, and hugged him with an arm, while the other cupped Ryan’s bulge, and stroke it. 

“Ya hard…” Daryl whispered in Ryan’s ear, and kissed the lobe.

Shivers ran down Ryan’s spine while he grew harder and harder. 

“Daryl…” Ryan almost moaned. 

“Shhh…” Daryl kissed Ryan softly. “Still need to be quiet…”

“Hmm....” Ryan hummed, softly cupping Daryl’s member, also stroking it. 

Daryl’s hand traveled from Ryan’s bulge to Ryan’s butt, and pinched it, before slipping his fingers between the buttcheeks. 

Ryan knew what was coming, and arched his back. 

“Daryl…” He whispered. 

“Tell me if I need to stop…” Daryl said, kissing Ryan’s shoulder. 

But Ryan didn’t tell Daryl to stop, Ryan wanted Daryl to go further. 

Daryl’s fingers traveled even further, starting prepping Ryan for entering. Ryan slowly lead Daryl to the bed, and sat him down. Ryan sat on top of Daryl and guided Daryl’s member to his entrance, after spitting in his hand to ‘lube’ Daryl’s member up. 

“Ryan…” Daryl moaned softly. “Doesn’t it… hurt?”

Ryan had his eyes closed as he sat down on Daryl’s lap, cowboy style. 

“Hnnnng…” Ryan nodded.

When Ryan was used to Daryl in him, he started to move, causing the both of them to softly moan. 

“Daryl…” Ryan breathed after a while, pressing his forehead against Daryl’s, and kissed him.

“Hmmm, Ryan…” Daryl moaned. “Close…” 

Daryl started to move with Ryan, who had been riding Daryl for while now, and who was close too. 

Before he came, Daryl pulled out, and both came over their chests. 

“Ryan…” Daryl said, while Ryan reached out for the clean blanket on top of the other bed to clean their chests. 

“Thank you.” Ryan said, kissing Daryl. Both laid down in bed, and pulled the covers over them.

Both fell asleep quickly after. 

 

Ryan had woken up before Daryl had, and started dressing himself. It was still dark, but the sun would rise soon, Ryan had figured. Because his prosthesis was still strapped on, he didn’t have to do that first. 

Breathing in deeply, Ryan stretched, feeling relaxed, even though there was a funny feeling at his butt. Given the activities of last night, he didn’t find it weird. 

“Mornin’” Daryl breathed, rubbing an eye. “Up early, huh?”

“Hm.” Ryan hummed, tossing Daryl his clothes. “Something isn’t right…”

Downstairs the alarm clock Rick had scavenged went off, indicating it was 6 in the morning. 

Ryan went downstairs, and got greeted by Rick. 

“Morning, Ryan. You’re up early.”

“Morning…” Ryan said, walking straight to the common area. 

“Wanna help farming?” Carl asked, who followed Ryan.

“Nah, have something else to do.” Ryan said, walking through to common area to get to the teahouse to get some breakfast. Carol was up too, preparing the breakfast. 

“Morning guys!” She greeted the three, and handed over some breakfast.

Carl and Rick greeted Carol politely, while Ryan only nodded, and started to eat slowly.

The sun started rising as Rick and Carl had shoved in some breakfast, and started farming. 

Ryan was about to put another bite in his mouth when he heard a gunshot. He dropped the bowl, and started running towards the sound, which appeared to come from cellblock D.

“Help!” Lizzie shouted, while she and her younger sister came running. “Help! Please come quick!” The two kids were shaken, but Ryan went straight to the cellblock, knife in hand.

“Walkers in D!” Glenn shouted, while Rick was running towards them.

“What about C?!” Rick asked in fury.

“Clear!” Sasha came running too, Daryl and Tyreese on her heel. “Gate is closed, Hershel is on guard!”

What they said further was unclear to Ryan, as he ran to cellblock D.

“Get out!” Ryan shouted to a guy standing in the doorway of cellblock D, and quickly after noticed there were Walkers in the cellblock.

Putting his mind on zero, Ryan started jabbing Walkers in the skull, killing them effectively. Daryl was the first one of the group to arrive after Ryan, and got to work quickly too.

“Ryan, Daryl, I’m here! Are you bit?” Rick shouted. “Go! Hold that!” Rick also instructed the surviving people, checking the fleeing people on bites really quickly. 

“Get back!” Daryl shouted as he pulled up a kid and ran away with him, while Ryan killed the Walker that wanted to eat the kid. 

Daryl handed over the kid to Karen, and grabbed his knife too. 

Glenn had also arrived at the scene, killing Walkers while others saved children, Carol being one of them.

“Check all of them! Even the cells!” Rick shouted, and Ryan ran upstairs to check some cells, but got attacked out of nowhere. 

“Down!” Ryan heard, and did as he was told. A crossbow arrow pierced the head of the Walker that attacked him. 

“Ya alright?” Daryl almost shouted, being the one that saved him. 

Ryan nodded, looking at the Walker that had attacked him.

“That’s Patrick.” Daryl said, while Ryan nodded again. 

Inside the cell where Patrick came from, was a dead woman, not yet a Walker. 

“I’ll do it…” Ryan muttered, stabbing the lady in the head.  

Daryl looked at Ryan when he did it. 

“I’m gonna shower…” Ryan suddenly muttered, walking past Daryl. 

Knowing Ryan needed some alone-time, Daryl nodded and didn’t bother him. 

In the showers, Ryan noticed blood on the ground. 

“This must be the place where he died…” Ryan muttered in himself, trying to get his mind clear. 

While Ryan pumped water, he thought back on what had happened. 

Turning on the water, Ryan let the blood flow away first before getting under the water, giving him some time to undress himself, and get his hair loose. 

Ryan had taken a very long shower, and after the water he had pumped was gone, he stood there until he was dry. After that he started dressing himself again, and tied his hair again. 

Ryan went outside, and saw Rick breaking down the pig shelter, while talking to Carl.

“What happened?” Ryan asked as he approached Rick. 

“Walkers.” Rick answered, pointing at a fence that was bent, and needed support of wooden poles. “To save the prison we had to sacrifice the pigs.”

Ryan nodded, and kept looking at the fence. “Thanks, Rick.”

“I did what I had to do.” Rick said. 

Looking at Rick, Ryan nodded. “I know.”

Rick looked back at Ryan, and nodded back.

“Carl. You need to stay from Judy.” Rick continued. “I know it’s hard.”

“I know, dad. It’s for the best.” Carl understood what Rick wanted to say. “We need to protect her.”

Ryan gave Carl a fistpump against his arm, before walking away.

“Ryan.” Rick called Ryan. “Keep an eye on Daryl for any symptoms of the flu. If he starts coughing, let me know.”

Pausing for a bit, Ryan nodded. “Yeah.”

 

Standing in the inner courtyard with Carol, Rick, Daryl and an angry Tyreese, Ryan looked down on two burned bodies in the middle of the courtyard. There was a big and bloody trail to the cells where Karin and David were put, to contain the flu. 

“You found ‘em like this?” Rick asked Tyreese, who also stared at the burnt bodies. 

“I came to see Karen.” Tyreese spoke, pretty calm. “And saw the blood on the ground.” He pointed at the trail. “And then I smelled them.”

Ryan was on guard, knowing it could go wrong, gripping his bat tightly. That’s why Rick had asked him to come along, together with Daryl. Carol was there because she had found the bodies too.

“Someone dragged them out here… And burned them!” Tyreese started to shout. “They killed ‘em and set ‘em on fire!”

Tyreese suddenly moved to Rick, causing Daryl and Ryan to jump in any minute. 

“You a cop.” Tyreese continued talking quite aggressively. “You find out who did this and bring ‘em to me, you understand?! You bring ‘em to me!”

“Yeah, we’ll find out…” Daryl grabbed Tyreese’s arm, who shook it off aggressively, still staring at Rick.

“I need to say it again?” Tyreese threatened. 

“No, I know what you’re going through.” Rick said calmly. “I’ve been there, you saw me there. It’s dangerous.”

“Karen didn’t deserve this!” Tyreese almost cut Rick off. “Neither did David. Nobody does!”

Tyreese got more and more aggressive in his talking. 

“Alright man…” Daryl grabbed Tyreese’s arm again, but in a quick move Tyreese pinned Daryl at a wall. Ryan had his bat up to swing it at Tyreese’s head to knock him out, before Daryl held his hand up, signalling he had it under control.

“We’re on the same side, man.” Daryl said directly to Tyreese.

“Hey look…” Rick continued. “I know what you’re going through. We’ve all lost someone. I know what you’re going through, but you have to calm down.” Rick had carefully put his hand on Tyreese’s shoulder, causing Tyreese to launch himself at Rick, pushing him back.

“Get the hell back!” 

“No,” Carol had her hands up, hoping Tyreese and Rick would stay calm.

“She wouldn’t want you being like this.” Rick said.

Tyreese had hit Rick hard in his face, successfully flooring Rick.

“Stop!” Carol shouted, and tried to get between Rick and Tyreese, but Tyreese launched another fist at Rick’s face. 

Ryan dropped the baseball bat, and together with Daryl grabbed Tyreese to prevent him to hit Rick more.

“That’s ‘nough.” Daryl huffed, Tyreese was a big guy, and with his anger like this, it was not easy to stop him. The was glad Ryan had jumped in too.

Rick got up, and hit Tyreese too, who fell down because Ryan and Daryl quickly had let go of him. 

But Rick didn’t stop after one hit. He actually got on top of Tyreese, hitting him multiple times before Daryl contained him.

“Let go of me!” Rick shouted.

“No.” Daryl said. “Stop.”

Daryl successfully got Rick off Tyreese, but got shoved away.

Tyreese had trouble breathing after Rick’s beating, while Rick looked at his bloodied hand in shock.

“Alright, big boy, time to get you to Hershel.” Ryan said, annoyed, grabbed his baseball bat, and grabbed the collar of Rick’s shirt, pushing him towards the corridor. 

Rick didn’t say anything, and let Ryan escort him to Hershel. 

“The two of you take care of him.” Ryan said to Carol and Daryl. “Put him in a cell to recover or something.”

On the way to Hershel, Rick calmed down, but stayed quiet. Ryan didn’t say much either.

“Hersel.” Ryan said, still annoyed, knocking on the bars of Hershel’s cell with his bat. “Rick needs his boo boo’s fixed. Can you do it, please?”

“Ryan.” Hershel looked up when he had heard Ryan’s voice. “Rick, come on in.”

Rick entered Hershel’s cell with his head down.

Ryan turned around, and went to find Carol or Daryl.

Soon he had found Carol. “How’s Tyreese?”

“His face is swollen. Didn’t want to get treated before David and Karen are in the ground. He’s digging holes right now.” Carol answered.

“Idiot…” Ryan muttered, but ended up in a coughing fit. “Fuck.”

“You’re getting sick?” Carol said. 

“Just a little cold I guess.” Ryan said. “I’m fine.”

“You need to go to cellblock A.” Carol said, grabbing Ryan’s arm.

Ryan shook loose, and looked at her. “I know. Just getting my stuff…”

“For what?” Carol asked. 

Ryan ignored her, going to get his stuff. 

 

The day went slowly. Sasha arrived at cellblock A too, going to doctor S., who was in the cellblock too, because he was sick. 

Eventually more people arrived, including Glenn and Lizzie. Even Hershel arrived, but he was here helping the sick. 

“Ryan.” Hershel entered the cell where Ryan was. “How are you feeling?”

Ryan barely could open his eyes, feeling as if all life was being sucked out of him. 

“What do you think?” Ryan barely could speak.

“By the looks of it you’re doing fantastic!” Hershel tried to lighten the mood. 

Ryan rolled his eyes, and got up for a bit. “What’s up?”

“Here. Drink this.” Hershel held up a cup with steaming tea. “It’s Elder-Berry tea.”

“Disgusting…” Ryan whispered, but drank the tea. 

“It’s good for you.” Hershel said, taking the empty cup from Ryan’s hand, and got up. “Call me if you need anything.”

“Hm…” Ryan hummed. “Daryl… Is he okay?”

“He is.” Hershel said. “Right now he is on a run for medication, so hang in there, okay?”

“Okay…” Ryan went back under some covers.

“Now get some rest. I’ll check on you in a while.” Hershel stepped out of the cell and slid the door closed. 

Hershel did indeed check up awhile later, but Ryan was out in a deep sleep. There were no signs of the flu, except for the heavy breathing and lots of sweating. 

“Ryan…” Hershel whispered, sitting on the bed next to Ryan. 

Ryan didn’t react quickly, but did react. “Hm?”

“You need to drink.” Hershel said, pulling Ryan up. To keep him steady, Hershel let Ryan rest against his chest.

“Don’t… Touch…” Ryan wanted to speak, being too weak to actually make a sentence.

“Shut up…” Hershel said, holding a bottle of water against Ryan’s lips, who took sips from the water as much as he could. Once Hershel was done, he laid Ryan back down, and put a wet cloth on his forehead. “I know you can fight.”

Ryan didn’t quite register what Hershel had said.

“Daryl… Okay?” Ryan managed to speak.

“Yeah, he is.” Hershel said. “He’ll be back soon with the medication.”

“Carl… Judith…” Ryan started to cough. 

“Calm down.” Hershel said. “They are safe.”

“And…” Ryan tried to look at Hershel. “... You?”

For a moment, Hershel needed to think. “I’m fine.”

Weakly nodding, Ryan closed his eyes again. “Good…”

“I have to check on others now. I’ll check on you in a while again.”

“Rest…” Ryan spoke.

“I need to help the sick first.” Hershel spoke, knowing Ryan was concerned about him. 

Hershel walked out, sliding the door back close again. 

But, Hershel didn’t check on Ryan in a while. Ryan had opened his eyes when he got woken up by gunshots in the cellblock. He got up, and noticed he felt a bit better.

Getting out of his cell, Ryan noticed a lot of dead bodies on the floor, but he didn’t care. He had to make sure Hershel was okay. He didn’t let the man touch him much, but over the past weeks they had become friends.

“You should rest…” Ryan heard Maggie’s voice on the second floor, so he walked up.

Hershel walked past, into the cell where doctor S.’s body was. 

Apparently doctor S. had died, and become a Walker. 

Standing in the door opening, Ryan watched Hershel break down into crying. 

Carefully, Ryan walked in, and sat next to Hershel in silence, laying his head on his shoulder as a form of comfort for the elderly man. 

 

The floor was trembling. 

Ryan shot up from his bed, not remembering how he got there, and when he fell asleep. 

He did notice an IV drip in his arm, but the bag was empty already, so he ripped the needle out of his arm. Ryan felt almost as good as new. 

“Hershel…” Ryan spoke up, but once he stepped out of his cell, he noticed the entire block was empty.

In an fluid movement, Ryan grabbed his bag, which still contained ammo, his knife and his gun, and his bat and walked through the prison. 

Nobody was to be found, which caused Ryan to be on guard even more. 

Outside, gunshots were heard. 

“Fuck…” Ryan muttered, grabbing his gun, making sure it was fully loaded. He also made sure his prosthesis was strapped on tightly.

Running to the courtyard, Ryan saw something he didn’t expect. The Governor stood on top of a tank, with cars around him, which contained armed people. 

What shocked Ryan the most were Hershel and Michonne being held captive by the Governor, while two others guarded them with guns. 

Ryan saw Daryl sneaking to the containers with guns, handing them out unnoticably. Relieved Daryl’s okay, Ryan nodded to him, grabbing a sniper rifle. 

Knowing he needed to find an unnoticable spot, Ryan hid behind some plants that were placed against the fence. 

The Governor nor his people had noticed him, so Ryan took his aim; the temple of the Governor. 

Just when he wanted to pull the trigger, the Governor walked to one of his men, grabbing Michonne’s sword, holding it against Hershel’s neck. 

Rick started to continue to talk to the Governor, but before Ryan had his aim back, the Governor slashed into the neck of Hershel. 

Shock flooded Ryan, causing him to pull the trigger, hitting the Governor in the shoulder, non lethal.

“Hershel!” Ryan shouted, and aimed for the Governor’s head again, missing multiple times as there was a gunfight going on. 

When Ryan reloaded, he lost the Governor out of eyesight, and started focussing on others, successfully killing those. 

Eventually Ryan found the Governor again, but was too disgusted to take action. Hershel had survived the first blow, but the Governor now decapitated his head.

In the meanwhile, the tank started moving, crashing down the fences, and shooting at the prison. 

It was a complete chaos, and Ryan didn’t know where everyone was. People screamed, and fled the prison. 

_ I need to protect them! _ Thoughts shot through Ryan’s head as he left his sniper spot, not having any sniper rifle ammo left, and grabbed a machine gun, including enough ammo for it. 

Mowing some enemies down, Ryan started to get angrier and angrier. 

This place was his home. These people destroyed it.

Gritting his teeth, Ryan tried his best to fight back the tears, successfully.

The emergency bus started to fill, which was good. 

But before everyone could get on, the bus drove away. 

“Shit!” Ryan cursed, continuing to fight the intruders. 

 

The whole fight was a blur, and somehow Ryan made it out, alive and well. He was watching the prison from a distance, seeing Michonne walk away with Walkers with a rope around their necks, arms and jaws gone. Ryan wanted to get closer to her, but he noticed Walkers behind him. 

Killing them with his knife, silently, Ryan had turned his back to where Michonne was. When he had turned back, Michonne had left, and Ryan had no idea where she went. 

Copying her method, Ryan somehow captured two Walkers, removed their arms and removed their teeth and jaws. The tied a rope he found around their necks, and started to walk away from the prison, from his home.


	7. Reunite

Walking for days, Ryan rarely rested, just like before he met the group. The Walkers at his side made him invisible for the other Walkers, so he didn’t have to run from them, or climb into trees. 

Ryan didn’t have much food or water with him, so he scavenged most of it on his way to nowhere. 

Thinking back about Hershel, about his wise words and how much Ryan had struggled under his touch made him sad. Hershel hadn’t deserved this. Ryan had grieved, had screamed, and almost cried the days close after Hershel’s death, followed by taking out his anger on the Walkers around him. Within a few hours of slashing into Walkers, Ryan was covered in Walker blood and guts. He even killed off the protection Walkers by accident.  

Ryan bit his lip, reminding himself not to drift off, he had to stay focussed in case there were people instead of Walkers around him. The Walker guts and blood on him kept the Walkers from attacking him, so that was good.

Gripping the knife he got from Daryl, Ryan walked onto a road with enormous houses, but no Walkers were on sight. 

Scavenging for water and food, Ryan walked into a house. The kitchen had been raided, but knowing there was always something hidden, Ryan walked up the stairs. 

“Walker inside… Got my shoe, didn’t get me…?” Ryan read out loud what was written on a door. 

Deciding to open the door, Ryan had his knife up, ready to kill the Walker inside. 

And so he did. The Walker dropped down on the floor, and Ryan stepped in, noticing the shoe immediately. 

Grabbing the shoe, he noticed the size wasn’t of an adult survivor. The shoe was the size for a young teen. 

“Carl…?” Ryan muttered in himself, walking away with the shoe still in his hand. 

_ Carl coudn’t have survived, could he?  _ Thoughts ran through Ryan’s head in record speed.  _ If Carl survived it, if he made it out… How long would he survive? Are others with him? _

Going house to house, Ryan went looking for him, knowing he probably would seek a shelter for a short while. 

“Carl?!” Ryan shouted into a house after opening the front door, hearing the moans of the Dead, knowing Carl wasn’t there. 

Running to the opposite house, Ryan couldn’t open the door, so he slammed on the door.

Ryan was convinced Carl wasn’t anywhere near, but then he heard a voice.

“Ryan?”

Turning to the sound, Ryan saw Carl standing on the porch. 

“Carl!” Ryan said, surprised.

Carl came sprinting towards Ryan, hugging Ryan. “You made it!”

“Yeah… I made it… You made it…” Ryan muttered, dropping the shoe and the knife he held on the ground to hug Carl back. 

“Carl?” Another voice sounded, and from around the house, Rick showed up. “Ryan!”

Rick made his way to his son and Ryan, wanting to take them both in his arms, but Ryan cut it off. 

“Okay, enough physical contact for the next few years.” Ryan said, shoving Carl away gently, and Rick stopped his actions before touching Ryan. 

“Got you something…” Ryan muttered, grabbing the shoe from the ground, and handing it over to Carl. “Thought you might have lost it.”

“My shoe!” Carl said, and put it on. “How did you…?”

“Killed the Walker that got you shoe.” Ryan answered, grabbing his knife too to put it away.

“Let’s go inside. There is someone else you might want to see.” Rick said, leading the two inside.

“Ryan!” Michonne shot up from the sofa that stood against the front door. “How?”

“Followed your trick.” Ryan confessed. “Decapitated Walkers, used them to make me invisible.”

Michonne her face went dark for a bit, before re-grabbing herself. “Smart.”

“How did you end up in Walker goo?” Carl asked.

Ryan swallowed. “I might have killed so much Walkers, I basically became one.”

“We did that trick back in the day,” Rick said. “Even before we were at Hershel’s farm.”

Hershel’s name fell heavy for Ryan, but he continued to listen.

“Made us invisible for the Walkers too.” Rick said. “Until it started to rain.”

“You need to wash your face, Ryan.” Michonne said. “You do indeed look like a Walker.”

“Nice to see you too.” Ryan said, seeking for a bathroom to find a towel to wipe his face off.

 

The following day, after a decent night of sleep, Carl, Michonne and Ryan went on a supply run, while Rick took his time to rest to let his wounds heal. 

Ryan had only cleaned his face, but the rest of his body, and even hair were still red of Walker blood and guts. This came in handy in case of Walkers.

Michonne and Carl went into one house, while Ryan went to explore the house next to it, gun and knife in hand. They would head back by noon, so Ryan kept an eye on the sun. 

Ryan had found some sealed bottles of water and some candy bars in the house, and even a razor and a bit of shaving cream. He used it on the spot, shaving the stubble on his face, while looking into a broken mirror. 

“You didn’t get bored, did you?” Carl grinned when he saw Ryan get out of the house without his stubble. 

“Entertained myself just fine.” Ryan answered. “How about you guys? Any trouble?”

“Nothing we couldn’t handle.” Michonne said.

Ryan nodded. “Next house?”

“Yeah, it isn’t noon yet.” Michonne said after swallowing a mouthful of ‘Crazy Cheese’.

The three of them went to the next house, this time all together. 

Carl asked lots of questions about Michonne, which made her uneasy. 

The conversation wasn’t for his ears, Ryan decided, and checked the rest of the house. 

Eventually, Ryan walked into a room with an entire family in it. All dead. 

This was something Ryan didn’t expect, and kept staring at the family of five.

“Let’s go out of here…” Michonne said to Ryan, who had entered the room without him hearing.

“Yeah…” Ryan turned around and made it out of the room as quick as possible. 

“Ryan? Michonne?” Carl asked, and both shut the door very quickly to prevent Carl from seeing it.

“Walker?” He asked.

“Dog.” Michonne lied, and Ryan was convinced Carl could tell straight through it, but didn’t question it. 

“Let’s go.” Ryan said. “Almost noon.”

Michonne and Carl nodded, and followed Ryan back to the base where Rick was.

“Go! Go! Go!” Rick suddenly came running for the trio, indicating to run as fast as possible.

Not questioning anything, the trio followed his lead, and ran far from the house. 

Away from the house, the four of them ended up walking on train rails, following it.

“Crazy Cheese?” Carl offered Michonne, who declined. 

“What’s that?” Ryan suddenly asked, eyeing some signs nex t to the trail. “‘Sanctuary for all. Community for all. Those who arrive, survive.  Terminus .’"

“Should we go?” Rick questioned. 

While Ryan kept quiet, the group decided to follow the trails. 

 

At night, they had made a fire to keep warm, while Carl spent the night in the car they found. 

They had trailed off the rails because Carl heard someone yell for help, but they couldn’t help the guy. 

While Michonne and Rick were chatting about unimportant stuff, Ryan just looked at the flames, feeling uneasy, gripping his bat. 

The uneasy feeling got confirmed when they heard a sound coming from the woods. Ryan got up in an instant, standing ready with his bat, Rick following his lead. 

Rick didn’t spot anything or anyone though, so he sat down pretty quickly again, but Ryan kept having that uneasy feeling.

“Oh dear me,” An unfamiliar male voice spoke. “You screwed up, asshole.”

Before Ryan could turn to the sound, he felt a gun against his temple, while his bat got ripped out of his hands. 

“You hear me?” The male who had a gun against Rick’s head spoke. “You screwed up.”

Rick held his in front of him, showing he didn’t have a weapon.

“Today is the day you’re going to pay your debt, sir. Restitution.” The man continued speaking to Rick. “Balancing the whole damn universe.”

Ryan looked around him for any weak spots, but they were outnumbered, and his gun was in the car with Carl. 

Carl had woken up from the guy talking, being surprised by another guy with a knife, grinning at him from outside the car. 

“Shit and I wanted to turn in for the night on New Years Eve.” The guy who spoke, started to laugh. “Now who’s gonna count down the ball dropper with me, huh? Ten Mississippi, nine Mississippi, eight Mississippi...”

“Joe.” A familiar voice cut the guy off. “Hold up…”

Ryan looked up, and saw the face he had missed so much.

Daryl’s face.

Shocked to see him still alive, Ryan froze. He had almost sworn everyone of the prison was dead, until he found Rick, Carl and Michonne.

Daryl looked around confused, and his gaze stopped at Ryan’s.

“You’re stopping me at eight, Daryl…” Joe spoke, grabbing Daryl’s attention again. 

Daryl stepped forward, while nodding slightly. “Just hold up.”

“This is the guy that killed Lou, so we have nothing to talk about.” The guy who kept his gun against Ryan’s temple spoke. 

“The thing about nowadays is that we have plenty of time to talk.” Joe said. “Say your piece, Daryl.”

“These people… Let ‘em go.” Daryl said. “These are good people.”

“I think Lou would disagree with ya,” Joe said in defense. “I, of course, have to speak for him, because you see, your friend here strangled him in the bathroom.”

“Ya want blood, I get it.” Daryl said, dropping his crossbow. “Take it from me man.”

“No!” Ryan said, wanting to go to Daryl, but got grabbed by the guy behind him. 

“Come on.” Daryl kept focussing on Joe.

“This man killed our friend. You say he is good people?” Joe shook his head. “You see, that right there is a lie! It’s a lie!”

Before Daryl could do something, the ‘spare’ gunman hit Daryl in the guts with the rear of his gun, beating Daryl up with another spare gunman. 

“No!” Now Rick shouted for Daryl.

“Teach him fella’s. Teach him all the way!” Joe cheered. 

Carl got dragged out of the car by the male at the car window, while Carl struggled against him. 

“Leave him be!” Rick growled, wanting to get up, but got pushed back by Joe.

The guy kept a knife near Carl’s neck, while Carl cried and struggled. 

Michonne and Ryan wanted to get to Carl to help him, but both got stopped. “Just wait your turn.”

“It was me!” Rick growled. “Me alone!”

“See, that’s right.” Joe said. “That isn’t a lie. Now we can settle this, we are reasonable men.”

Daryl still got beat up, and Ryan had to restrain himself from doing something stupid. 

“First. We’re going to beat Daryl to death, then the girl, after the girl the bloodied get’s it, and finally the kid. After that we’ll shoot you and we’re even.” Joe said in Rick’s ear, loud enough for Michonne and Ryan to hear, and started to laugh. 

Carl got pushed on the ground, and the big guy got on top of him, trying to undress the boy. “Stop squirming.” Ryan started to rage, knowing what Carl was going through right now, struggling to get free from the grip. 

“Let him go.” Rick growled. “Let him go!” 

Suddenly, Rick moved, causing Joe to fire a bullet, but nobody got hit. In confusion, Joe backed off, giving Rick the chance to get up and beat the guy. Rick received several hits himself too. 

This action caused Michonne and Ryan to react too. Michonne hit the gun out of her face, and Ryan managed to get free from the grip he was in, and also hit the gun out of his face.

“Come on! Get up! Show me what you got!” Joe said to Rick who was on the ground. 

Carl still struggled on the floor, causing Rick to get even angrier. “Leave him be!” 

Rick wanted to go to Carl, but got stopped by Joe, standing close to Rick and holding him in place. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Joe threatened, not expecting Rick’s following action. 

Rick actually bit into the throat of Joe, and ripped out the flesh, spitting it on the ground as Joe bled out and fell on the ground gurgling. The other men were shocked by what Rick had done, clearly scared. Michonne turned the gun of her captive around, shooting the guy in through the head, while Ryan had floored the guy who held him and started beating him up with his bat, until the brains of the guy littered the ground. Daryl managed to find the chance to fight his beaters, killing them.

The guy who had Carl, let go of him, and pulled him up, held the knife even closer to his throat. “I’ll kill him!”

“He’s mine” Rick growled, holding a knife from Joe, and walked towards the guy, staring him down. 

Quickly the guy let go of Carl, scaredly. “Please… Please!” But Rick didn’t show any mercy, stabbing the guy in his stomach, cutting open his entire torso, and continued to stab the guy repeatedly. 

Michonne had taken Carl into her arms, protecting him.

Daryl, who had to regain his balance, leaned on the hood of the car and watched Rick and Ryan in their rage. 

“Not my family!” Ryan managed to growl, and got to the next body to beat it’s head up, since the first victim didn’t have much head left to beat. 

“Ryan!” Daryl tried to calm Ryan down from the hood of the car. “It’s over!”

Ryan on the other hand, was so deep in his beatings, he didn’t hear Daryl, and only stopped when he felt Daryl’s arms sneaking around his arms. 

Instantly, Ryan calmed, but not completely. 

“It’s over.” Daryl repeated. 

Michonne calmed Carl down, while Rick sat against the car to clear his mind, so nobody paid attention to Daryl and Ryan. 

Dropping his bat, Ryan let his arms rest before turning around in Daryl’s arms and hugging the older man back. 

Daryl was still pretty shaken himself, so he used the contact with Ryan as support himself too. Also Daryl had thought everyone was dead, except for Beth who he was with.

To hold his lover in his arms, safe and sound, was a miracle for him. 

“You’re alive…” Daryl managed to say, almost breaking down into crying.

Ryan nodded, pressing himself even tighter against Daryl.  

“Daryl…” This was the only thing Ryan managed to say before looking up, and pulling Daryl’s head down for a kiss. 

The kiss was intense, and didn’t go unnoticed by Carl and Michonne. 

“Are they…?” Michonne started, but got cut off by Carl.

“Yeah, they’re together.” Carl said, still shaken of what happened. “Quite some time, actually.”

Ryan had heard the two talk, and tensed up a bit. “Daryl…”

“Don’t worry…” Daryl muttered. 

Carl got up, and walked to the two guys. “I know it’s hard for you, Ryan, but you don’t have to worry about it.”

Michonne got up too, and joined Carl. “You two are cute together.”

Daryl turned as red as a tomato, while Ryan hid his face in Daryl’s chest. 

“You made them shy, Michonne.” Carl laughed. 

“It is the truth.” Michonne grinned. “Love is rarely seen these days.”

“Please, don’t hurt him.” Ryan said. 

“Ryan, we’re not gonna hurt anyone.” Rick got up from behind the car, and joined them. “We’re family.”

 

Rick had taken his place against the car again, while Michonne guarded Carl in the car, who was fast asleep. Ryan laid on top of the car, staring at the sky, while Daryl came back from somewhere. 

“Here.” Daryl said to Rick, handing a wet rag. 

“Should save the water for drinking.” Rick had said in defense, but got shut down by Daryl.

“You can’t see your face, they can.” Daryl said.

Rick accepted the rag, and wiped his face. Daryl joined Rick on the ground, looking at his hands. 

“I didn’t know what they were.” Daryl started.

“How did you wind up with ‘em?” Rick asked.

“I was with Beth. We got out together. I was with her for a while.” Daryl had more to say, but didn’t.

“Is she dead?” Rick asked. 

“She’s just gone.” Daryl looked at Rick. “After that, that’s when they me. I knew they were bad, but they had a code. Simple. Stupid. But it was something, it was enough.”

“And you were alone.” Rick nodded.

“So they were looking for some guy, told they spotted ‘em yesterday. I was layin’ back. I was gonna leave… but I stayed.” Daryl paused. “Then I saw it was you four, right when you saw me. I didn’t know what they could do…”

“It’s not on you, Daryl.” Rick said, while Daryl looked at the ground. “Hey, it’s not on you. You being back with us, here, means everything.”

Both sat in silence for a bit.

“You’re my brother.” Rick said.

Daryl looked up at Rick, taking the words in. 

“What you did last night, everyone would have done that.” Daryl said. 

“No, not that.” Rick replied, thinking back on last night.

“Somethin’ happened.” Daryl spoke. “That ain’t you.”

“You saw what I did to Tyreese. It ain’t all that, but that’s me. That’s why I am here now, that’s why Carl is here now. I wanna keep him safe. That’s all what matters.”

 

The group picked up their journey to Terminus, walking over the unused tracks towards Terminus. 

Rick, Michonne and Carl walked in front of Ryan and Daryl, both walking in silence. 

“She talked a lot, y’know.” Daryl broke the silence between him and Ryan. “‘Bout you, too.”

Ryan looked up, seeing Daryl looking at him. 

“She didn’t want to believe anyone had died.” Daryl continued. “She told me you were strong, you would survive. She was right.”

“I barely made it alive.” Ryan said.

“But you made it.”

“Yeah.”

“We’re going through the woods.” Rick said suddenly. “We don’t know who they are.”

Following his lead, the group walked through the woods, until they were met with a fence. Rick dropped the bag with guns and other weapons he was carrying, and observed through the fence.

“We’ll spread out. Watch out, and see what we see.” Rick said. “We need to stay close.”

Daryl and Ryan teamed up, as expected by the others, but there wasn’t anything to see. Just the back of Terminus, so Daryl and Ryan went back to Rick, who put his revolver into the bag he was carrying.

“Just in case.” Rick said, closing the bag. 

“Wait.” Ryan said, and held out his bat. “This one should go in there too.”

“Why?” Rick asked, not understanding why Ryan would hide his signature weapon. 

“Just in case… Also my backpack should go in. Has some ammo in it.”

Rick nodded, understanding where Ryan came from, and put the bat and bag into the larger bag before burying it. 

The group got over the fence, armed and all. They were ready for what was coming. 

But nothing was coming, it was silent. 

Daryl and Rick in front, the group made it quick and silent to a fire-exit, weapons up high before entering it.

Inside a female voice was being heard, repeating a message over and over again. 

There was a big hall, and first to be seen was the lady speaking the messages. She had headphones on, and sat behind a desk with a microphone. It looked like she was broadcasting. 

Looking further into the hall, the group saw people making the boards and messages as seen by the tracks. 

The group entered the hall, and Rick spoke. “Hello…”

The lady at the desk looked surprised as Rick repeated his greeting.

“Well.” A guy at the other tables spoke. “Looks like Albert has perimeter watch.”

The guy with short, dark brown hair and a small beard, put down his brush, and walked towards the group, who now lined up next to each other. 

“You here to rob us?” The guy spoke.

“No.” Rick told him, gun in his hand. “We wanted to see you before you saw us.”

The guy smiled, and nodded while looking around for a bit. “Makes sense.”

“Usually we do this where the tracks meet.” The guy walked forward towards the group. “Welcome to Terminus. I’m Gareth. Looks like you’ve been on the road for a good bit.”

“We have.” Rick answered, nodding. “Rick. That’s Carl, Daryl, Michonne and Ryan.”

Gareth awkwardly held up his hand as a greeting to the others, not receiving a greeting from any. 

“You’re nervous, I get it!” Gareth said in an awkward way, and walked forward again. “We’re all the same way. We came here for sanctuary. Is that what you’re here for?” 

“Yes.” Rick nodded.

“Good. You found it.” Gareth made a small nod. “Alex!”

Another guy stepped forward, walking towards Gareth and the group.

“It isn’t as pretty as the front, we’ve got nothing to hide, but the welcome wagon is a whole lot nicer.” Gareth continued speaking to the group as an introduction. “Alex will ask you a few questions, but first we need to see everyone’s weapons. Just lay them out in front of ya.”

Rick made eye contact with everyone of the group, except with Ryan, who had his eyes focussed on Gareth and Alex, not trusting them.

“Alright.” Rick said, laying his weapons down on the floor, and the others followed, Ryan included. Ryan only put his gun on the floor, while keeping his knife hidden in his prosthesis filled boot. 

“I’m sure you’ll understand.” Gareth said, spreading his arms as an indication Rick should do that so he could get searched by the guys.

“We do.” Rick answered while getting searched. “I wouldn’t touch Ryan if I were you.”

“We have to search him to make sure he doesn’t have more weapons than he says he has.” Gareth said, moving away from Rick. Alex had searched Michonne, Carl and Daryl already, and headed to Ryan now.

“I understand,” Rick said, wanting to talk them out of it, knowing it wouldn’t go well if Ryan was to be touched. “He doesn’t even allow us to touch him.” A small lie for their own good.

“He’ll have to bite through.” Alex said, and touched Ryan’s left arm.

Ryan gave the guy a right-hook in the face, flooring Alex.

“I warned you.” Rick said. 

Gareth didn’t take any action, while Alex got up, and walked back to Gareth. Gareth and Alex trusted Ryan didn’t have any more weapons, because the group had been honest about the weapons. 

“They deserve it? Even the guy that hit me?” Alex asked, looking at Carl.

“Yes.” Carl said without  hesitation. “Especially the guy that hit you.”

“Just so you know, we aren’t those kind of people.” Gareth continued to speak. “But we aren’t stupid either. And you shouldn’t be stupid enough to try something stupid, like he did.” Gareth pointed at Ryan. “As long as everyone can do that, we shouldn’t have any problems. Only solutions.”

Rick nodded, while Alex gave back the weapons. 

Ryan picked up his own, just like Daryl did.

“Follow me.” Alex said, and lead the way outside, while the group followed. 

“How long has this place been here?” Daryl asked.

“Since almost the start.” Alex answered. “When camps were overrun, people came here. I think it was instinct, you know. Follow a path...”

The group arrived in a courtyard filled with plants, chairs and home-made tables with parasols. Even a small BBQ-spot was there. 

“Hi,” The woman behind the BBQ said when the group had stopped there. “You came through the back door. Smart. You’ll fit in right here.”

“Mary, could you fix these people something to eat?” Alex asked.

Ryan looked around, sensing something was wrong here. He got closer to Rick and touched his arm to get his attention, and only his attention. 

Rick nodded, knowing Ryan did see the same as he did. His eyes trailed over the place, noticing a backpack and armour from the prison, and even Daryl’s poncho.

Ryan had noticed a silver chain going into the pocket of Alex, touching Rick again to make that clear. 

Once Rick saw that, his patience was over, and walked over to Alex, smashing the plate with meat away, grabbing the chain, and also grabbing Alex, pointing a gun against his head. The silver chain was what he thought it was; Hershel’s pocket watch he had given to Glenn. 

The group drew their weapons, while Rick started talking. 

“Where the hell did you get this watch?” Rick said with a threatening tone. “Where the hell did you get this watch?!”

“You want answers? Anything else? Put down the gun.” Alex said, hands up in the air. 

“I can see your sniper rifle at the roof. How good is he? How did you get the watch?!” Rick moved around a bit, before repeating the question.

“Don’t do anything!” Alex shouted to everyone from Terminus involved. “I have this! Put it down!”

The sniper on the roof did put the rifle down.

“Listen to me, there are a lot of us.” Alex trembled. 

“Where did you get the watch?”

“Did get it off a dead one, didn’t think he’d need it.” 

Rick nodded, irritated, and seeing right through the lie. “What about the riot-gear, the poncho?”

“Got the riot-gear off a dead cop.” Gareth suddenly said, causing Rick to turn to him. “Found the poncho on a clothesline.”

“Gareth, we can wait.” Alex tried to talk to Gareth. 

“Shut up.” Gareth told him. 

“You talk to me.” Rick said to Gareth. 

“What’s there left to say?” Gareth asked. “You don’t trust us anymore.”

“Gareth…”

“Shut up!”

“Gareth, please…” Alex pleated. 

“It’s okay.” Gareth kept his eyes locked on Rick. “Rick, what do you want?”

“Where are our people?” Rick asked. 

“You didn’t answer the question.” Gareth had his hand up, but now closed it, causing Terminus to break into a gunfight. 

Rick turned around and shot Alex, while the group shot at the surrounders. The sniper on the roof also started to shoot, causing the group to run somewhere else. 

“Come on!” Daryl lead the group. 

On their run they also ran past sea-containers, hearing voices come out of them.

“Keep going!” Rick shouted, running into the building again. 

It was like a maze, and the group even ran into a church-like hall, filled with lit candles and decorated with names and texts.

“What is this place?” Daryl asked, looking around. 

“They don’t want us killed.” Michonne said. 

“They are aiming at our feet.” Ryan said to confirm Michonne’s statement, while looking around the hall.

“There.” Rick pointed at a door on the opposite side of the hall, leading the group to it. 

But before they could reach it, someone slammed it shut, preventing the group from going out.

“There.” Daryl pointed, and the group followed him. 

They ended up outside again, and again shots were fired at their feet. 

People appeared around them, successfully trapping the group. 

“Drop your weapons, now!” A sniper up the roof shouted, but the group didn’t drop their weapons. “Now!”

Rick was the first to lay down his weapons in front of him, others following him. 

“Ringleader, go to your left!” Gareth stood on the roof with a sniper, giving Rick the order. “To the train car, go!”

Rick looked at the train car, but didn’t go to it. 

“You do as we say, and the boy goes with you.” Gareth said. “Anything else he dies, and you end up in there anyways.”

Rick ended up following the order, and walked to the train car. 

“Now the archer.” 

Daryl followed Rick. 

“Now the samurai.”

Also Michonne followed Rick to the train car, not breaking eye contact with Gareth for a while. 

“The mute now.” Gareth now gave Ryan the order, who actually did as he was told, leaving Carl, but not losing Carl from his eyesight. 

“Stand at the door; Ringleader, archer, samurai, mute. In that order.” Gareth commanded. 

Carl looked absolutely terrified at the others. 

“My son!” Rick shouted, noticing Carl’s distress. 

“Go, kid.” Gareth eventually said, and Carl walked towards the group. “Ringleader, open the door and go in.”

“I’ll go in with him!” Rick shouted back. 

“Don’t make us kill him now!”

Defeated, Rick stepped on the small stairs, opened the door of the train car, and got in, the others following him. 

Rick took Carl in his arms as he got in, and the doors got closed by someone outside. 

Ryan was on guard, they weren’t the only ones in the train car. 

“Rick?” A familiar voice spoke, and stepped into a ray of light. It was Glenn.

More footsteps followed, revealing Maggie, Sasha, Bob and some others. 

“They are friends.” Maggie said after noticing Rick looking at the others. “They helped save us.”

“Now they are friends of ours.” Daryl said. 

“For how long that’ll be.” The red haired guy spoke. 

“No.” Rick shook his head slightly. “They are going to feel pretty stupid when they find out.”

Rick looked through a slit in the car.

“Find out what?” The red haired guy asked.

“... They are screwing with the wrong people.”

 

The group had introduced themselves to the strangers, and the strangers had introduced them to the group.

Except Ryan, he sat in a corner, pulling off his boot. 

“Is he stupid, or just deaf?” Abraham, the red haired guy asked. 

“Give him a few minutes.” Rick said. “His name is Ryan.”

Daryl walked to Ryan, and kneeled next to him. “Does it hurt? Your leg.”

Ryan shook his head, and revealed the knife in his boot. 

“Smart fucker…” Daryl muttered. 

“We should make weapons.” Ryan said. “Sooner or later they’ll get us out of here.”

Rick heard Ryan, and nodded. “Yeah, we should.”

And so be it. 

The group started making weapons of clothes and scraps from the train car. Rick used the chain of Hershel’s watch to cut into the wood frame of the car, while others made claws of their belt buckle, and securing it by wrapping the belt around their hand and wrist. 

“Alright.” Daryl said, who looked through a slit to see if there was anyone coming. “Four of ‘em pricks coming our way.”

“You know what to do. Go for their eyes first. Then their throats.” Rick instructed. 

“Put your backs against the walls, now!” Was shouted outside of the car, but nobody did, they all stood ready to take out the first who opened the door. 

But to everyone’s surprise, the door didn’t open. 

Ryan quickly put his knife into his boot again, and noticed the roof opening. 

A smoke grenade was dropped into the car.

“Move!” Abraham shouted, and the grenade went off. 

 

Ryan his hands were being tied on his back, and he got a rag around his mouth. He got dragged out side of the car, struggling heavily against the contact. 

Ryan didn’t know if he was the only one being taken out, or if there were others. 

He got pushed down onto his knees, while his feet got bound. Well, one feet got bound to the prosthesis. At a table in the same hall were two people dismembering a dead guy, but it wasn’t a Walker.

Ryan looked around, and saw Rick, Glenn, Daryl and Bob with him. Rick was at the far end of the steel through, while Bob was kneeling next to him. Glenn was next to Bob, and Daryl next to Glenn. Ryan kneeled next to Daryl and a few strangers, all lined up. 

Behind Rick, a guy was sharpening knives, and another one was swinging a bat to warm up.

The guys moved on to the side where the strangers were kneeling, hitting the first one on the back of the head, knocking him out, and slitting his throat to bleed out. 

Soon, they continued to the second one, giving him the same treatment. 

The teamwork between the guys made it all go quick.

Ryan moved towards Daryl, trying to grab his hand. It was quite difficult to do while bound. 

Daryl closed his own fingers around Ryan’s, looking at him in agony. Only one guy before it was Ryan’s turn. 

Suddenly, Gareth walked into the hall. “Hey guys. What are your shot counts?”

“Thirty eight.” One guy said, hitting the stranger next to Ryan with the bat, while the other guy slit the throat. 

Daryl saw how the guy with the bat got ready to hit Ryan, but got interrupted by Gareth. 

“Hey. Shot count?”

“Crap man. I’m sorry, it’s my first round up.” The guy with the knife said. 

“After you’re done here, go back to your point and count the shells.” Gareth said. “Four from A, four from D?” Gareth pointed at the guys lined up. 

“Yeah.”

Bob started screaming something about telling something to Gareth, but Ryan didn’t catch it. All he was focussed on was Daryl, but suddenly broke contact with him, both eye contact and hand contact were gone, confusing Daryl. 

Ryan was reaching for his knife while the two butchers were distracted, and Gareth was too busy with Bob. 

While Gareth moved on to Rick, Ryan managed to cut the tie-wrap around his feet, but remained into position, cutting the tie-wrap around his wrists. 

It was difficult, but not impossible. 

Suddenly, shots were being heard, causing Gareth to leave, and the butchers to lose focus. 

Daryl looked at Ryan for one last time, but wasn’t met with sadness. 

Ryan had determination in his eyes. 

The ground shook as there was an explosion being heard. 

“You there, Gareth?” The one with the knife tried to radio Gareth. 

“He’s busy.” The bat-guy said. 

“You smell the smoke? Hear the shots?” The knife guy panicked. “He could be dead! They hell are we doin’ here, this place is going up in smoke.”

“You’re on first round up, and you broke the protocol already,” The bat-guy walked to the guy with the knife, away from Ryan. “Security isn’t your job, this is.”

The knife guy turned around.

“Hey, look at me.” The bat-guy said, but before speaking any further, Ryan had creeped behind him and stabbed in him in the neck, while Rick stabbed the other guy in the neck and stomach. He had a sharp piece of wood, and must have used the same method as Ryan had. The both of them nodded at each other, and ran towards the others, freeing them from their bounds. 

“Sounds like a damn war.” Glenn said after removing the cloth from his mouth. 

“There.” Rick pointed at the knives on a table. Ryan grabbed the baseball bat, and a knife from a table, he had put his own knife back into his boot again. 

The group moved from the hall, walking into a room where corpses were hanging to dry. 

“Don’t hesitate to kill them. They wouldn’t.” Rick said. 

Looking through a door, the group noticed Walkers had gotten into Terminus. Rick and Glenn were making up a plan, while Ryan snuck out already. 

“Ryan!” Rick almost shouted, and followed him. 

Quickly, the others got outside, and started killing Walkers, making their way to a sea-container. 

Ryan quickly opened the door of it, and moved on, smashing in some skulls of Walkers. Suddenly Ryan got pulled back by Rick, some Terminus residents were coming, shooting at Walkers. 

“Wait here.” Rick said, and stalked the residents silently. 

Ryan on the other hand, had other plans. He killed the last one silently with the knife he had, and took his machine gun, and shot the others down quickly. Ryan dropped the bat as it was in his way now.

Impressed by Ryan, Rick made it back to the group, and so did Ryan. 

The group ran back to the train car where they were being held, to free the others. 

“Quick!” Rick shouted. “We’re making our way to the fence!”

The others quickly got into action, while Ryan shot Walkers down to create a path. He was the first one to get over the fence, and started shooting through the fence to back the group up. 

The group walked back to the point where Rick had buried the bag with weapons. 

“What the hell are we still around here for?” Abraham asked. 

“Weapons. Supplies.” Rick answered, and started shoveling the bag up. “Round up at the fences, shoot through it.”

“What?” Bob asked. 

“Rick, we just got out.” Glenn added. 

“They don’t get to live.” Rick simply stated. 

“It’s over.” Ryan said, and grabbed his bag and bat as soon as Rick had opened the bag. 

“It’s not over until they are all dead.” Rick said, checking the ammo in his revolver. 

“The hell it is, that place is on fire.” Rosita spoke. “Full of Walkers.”

“I’m not taking around with this crap.” Abraham added. “We just made it out.”

“The fences are down. They’ll run or die.” Maggie said. 

Some sounds made the group turn around, to be met with a familiar face. 

“Carol…” Ryan muttered, while Daryl ran to her to hug her, the two of them were close. 

As if he had seen light, Rick walked towards Carol too. Daryl quickly made way for Rick, and stood next to Ryan. Daryl’s face was full of emotions, he had almost lost Ryan, and the return of Carol had brought emotions with them too. 

Ryan slipped his hand into Daryl’s, trying to comfort him. 

“Did you do this?” Rick asked, and Carol nodded. 

Rick hugged Carol. “Thank you.”

“You have to come with me.” Carol breathed, before giving Daryl his crossbow. 

Carol lead the group to a small cabin in the woods. 

They arrived just as Tyreese exited the cabin with a baby. Judith. 

Not believing their eyes, Rick and Carl ran to Tyreese to take Judith into their arms, and Sasha hugged Tyreese. The reunion was the best thing that could have happened at this point.

Daryl, still overwhelmed by emotions, looked from a distance, not wanting to interrupt the Grimes. Ryan stood next to Daryl still holding his hand. 

“I’m glad we got out.” Ryan told Daryl. 

“Me too…” Daryl told Ryan, and gave him a quick peck on the head before anyone could see them. 

The group continued their way from Terminus after the emotional reunion, and Rick even changed a sign leading to Terminus, telling there isn’t sanctuary there. 

A few weeks had passed, and the group was still on the road, scavenging for supplies since they ran out. 

“Be sure to make it back before sundown.” Rick told Ryan and Daryl, both going on a run again. 

“As always.” Ryan answered, strapping his prosthesis tightly before standing up straight, and grabbing his knife, leaving the bat at the small camp. He and Daryl had been on quite some runs since Terminus. 

Rick nodded. “Good.”

“Come on.” Daryl nudged Ryan in the side. 

“Be safe.” Rick told Daryl and Ryan before they left off.

“Ya got it.” Daryl said back, while Ryan nodded. 

The two of them left the group, and started off together, as always.

“Imma take the woods, you take the road?” Daryl asked after fifteen minutes together. “We’ll meet again at the group.”

Ryan nodded, and continued walking to the road, not far from the place where they were now. “Stay safe.”

Daryl watched Ryan go, and quickly added a ‘you too’, before going his own way. 

On this run, Daryl had caught several squirrels. Pretty proud of himself, he made it back to the group in the woods, near the road, sundown was nearing. 

When he arrived, he noticed Ryan wasn’t there yet, which wasn’t strange. Ryan didn’t always show up before sundown, but some minutes after. Told the group he forgot the time, but he always made it back before dark. 

But not this time. 

“Where’s Ryan?” Rick asked when Daryl arrived.

“We split up again. Bigger chance to get somethin’.” Daryl answered. 

“Yeah, but it’s sundown already.” 

“He’ll show up.” Daryl said, convinced Ryan would turn up.

“Hope he’s alright.” Rick answered, but before he could say anything more, the sound of tires slipping on the road crashed their ears, including a thud.

Daryl, Rick and Michonne were the first to run to the road, only to see a car drive off with high speed, and a few half-filled bottles littering the road. 


	8. Grady Memorial Hospital

Dark. Heavy.

Ryan had no energy to move, or even open his eyes. He could remember going back to the group with some bottles he had found, but that’s it.

“Ryan?” A female voice rang through his head, and it sounded as it was far away. “It’s me, Beth.”

_ Beth… _

“I wanted you to know I was here.” She continued. “After the prison, I was with Daryl. He was quite a dick, you know. He had given up hope. I think he was worried about you, since the two of you were so close at the prison.”

“Beth, what are you doing?” An unfamiliar female voice rang through Ryan‘s ear. “You know better than to talk to comatose patients.”

“Yes, Dawn.” Beth said. “I was just thinking he might wake up…”

“He has severe head injuries, the chance is he won’t wake up at all. If he won’t wake up tomorrow, we’ll cut the medication.” Dawn said. “Now come with me.”

Next to be heard were footsteps, followed by silence.

 

“Hey, Ryan,” Beth’s voice was there again. “I know you can’t hear me, but I still wanted to talk. I want you to know what happened after the prison.”

A small pause followed.

“After Daryl and I were in a fight, we ended up at a golf club. I had told Daryl I needed a drink, an alcoholic drink since daddy never allowed me to drink. It was funny. Golfers usually were rich people, so when we stepped inside the club, the first thing Daryl did was shove money and jewellery into a ladies purse, as if he found the biggest treasure in the world. He actually took the purse with him. Can you imagine it? Daryl walking around with a ladies purse.” Beth laughed. “The only alcohol left in the club was Peach Schnapps. Daryl smashed it, saying this wasn’t a real drink. He took me to a cabin in the woods, and actually found Moonshine, home-made alcohol. It was disgusting. We even got drunk, and did a drinking game. After that it went to shit.”

Silence again, but without saying anything more, Beth left. 

Having no concept of time, Ryan didn’t know how long it took for Beth to come back. 

“Look at this petite guy.” An unfamiliar male voice spoke. “I might use him as one of my girls, picturing him as one.”

“Go away, Gorman. He isn’t your patient.” Another male voice spoke, unknown to Ryan. 

“You might be treating him, doc Edwards, but you don’t tell me what to do.” Gorman spoke, and apparently left. 

“Don’t let that happen to him!” Beth’s voice suddenly appeared. “Let Dawn take him.”

“You know I can’t do much.” Doctor Edwards spoke. “Hold this.”

“What are you doing?” Beth asked. 

“Dawn’s orders.” Edwards spoke. “This is the last shot we can give. If he doesn’t wake up tomorrow, he’s unsaveable.”

“Save him!” Beth plead. 

“Do you know him, or something?” Edwards asked, but Beth stayed quiet.

 

Ryan tried to open his eyes, and somehow succeeded. 

Sharp rays entered his eyes, causing him to close them again for a second. He kept blinking until his eyes were used to the light, and slowly looked around him. He couldn’t move his neck or head, but he was able to see an IV at his right side, and some other hospital related stuff. 

Trying to open his mouth to say something, he noticed a tube going into his throat, making Ryan unable to speak. 

“Look who’s awake!” It was Gorman’s voice that sounded. “Good.”

Hands suddenly partially stripped Ryan from his hospital clothes, pulling up the shirt, and pulling down the pants and underwear Ryan was wearing. Gorman’s eyes traveled up and down Ryan’s semi-naked body. 

“Damn, if they told me you were a girl, I’d believe it too.” Gorman grinned.  “Luckily for you I can still use you.” Gorman hard-handed lifted Ryan’s legs up to see his ass. “Yeah, I can make good use of that.”

Ryan wasn’t able to move yet, but agony struck him. 

_ Not again! _

“Gorman! Get out of here, now! Don’t let me see you anywhere near my patient ever again!” Dawn’s voice rang, and she got into the picture. “Now!”

The woman with dark hair, pulled back into a ponytail had a serious look on her face, even after sending Gorman away.

“Beth!” She called, and after Beth came in the picture, she started to give orders. “Dress him again, and remove the tube from his mouth. Inject some painkillers, clean his wounds, and then update his condition with me.”

“Yes, Dawn.” Beth said, with shock in her eyes.

Dawn left, while Beth was dressing Ryan again, with gentle hands. 

“I’m sorry, I’ll have to touch you…” Beth said while being busy pulling Ryan’s pants up again. 

Ryan just stared to the ceiling, eyes big and filled with tears. 

“Gorman is an asshole. I hope he’ll die.” Beth said, now pulling Ryan’s shirt down. “You’re decent again. Let’s remove the tube from your mouth.”

Gently, Beth removed the tube. 

“Can you talk?”

“W… What happened…” Ryan managed to bring out.

“You got brought here…”

“... After drinking… Daryl…” Ryan wasn’t done speaking. 

“Oh…” Beth said, and sat on the edge of Ryan’s bed. “We were so drunk, Daryl took a piss in the home, and got angry with me. Started shouting at me how he never had a frozen yoghurt, a pet pony, and more. I got angry with him too, resulting him forcing me to shoot his crossbow at a Walker.”

Ryan looked at Beth as she spoke.

“Eventually he broke, blaming himself for my father’s death, and your death. During the night, we got in the house again, and the Moonshine wore off. We shared memories of the past, and even burned the house down. We were on good terms again, better than before. We got to a funeral house, where we lived for a few days. In the first night, Daryl was making sure the house was safe, and actually joined me in the ceremony room as I played the piano and sang. He layed down in a coffin, claiming it was the best bed he has had in years. After a few days, we got overrun by Walkers. Daryl told me to get out, and he would follow me. Before he could make it out, I got hit by a car, and now I’m here.” Beth left out some details for Ryan, not finding the need to tell them to him, and got the right medication to put into his IV. “How did you get here?”

Ryan thought back on how he was walking back to the group, before opening his eyes here again. “I… was going back to the group when...”

“Beth, he shouldn’t be talking right now.” Doctor Edwards came in. “How is he doing?”

“Fine.” Ryan said, just to annoy the doctor.

Edwards just looked at Ryan, before continuing to talk to Beth. “Have you cleaned his wound yet?”

“No. But don’t you think we should cut the rest of his hair too?” Beth asked. “It looks weird how it is now.”

“You can do it if you want. Put him in a wheelchair though.” The doctor left again. 

“What…?” Ryan asked. 

“We had to cut your hair to reach the wound.” Beth said, rolling the wheelchair in the corner to the bed. “I’ll make it proper now.”

Ryan only flinched a bit when Beth touched him to help him into the wheelchair. 

“I actually have a comb here.” Beth said, showing the comb to Ryan. “You’ll look handsome as ever when I’m done. Now, sit still.”

Ryan softly smiled when Beth said that, not finding himself handsome or something. Beth was a real charmer. 

“Did they all survive?” Beth asked. “The group?”

“Yeah.” Ryan said. “Found Rick, Carl and Michonne after a few days of being on my own. Later Daryl joined us, alone. Did bring some trouble with him.” 

“So he found you guys.” Beth said, relieved. “That’s good.”

“Everyone, except for Carol, Judith, Mica, Lizzy and Tyreese ended up at the same sanctuary. Turned out it was just full of batshit crazy cannibals.” Ryan continued. “We escaped, though, with the help of Carol. She didn’t know we were there, but still saved us. Turns out she was with Tyreese and Judith. No idea what happened to Lizzy and Mica...”

“I’m glad to hear everyone got back together.” Beth smiled, cutting long strands of hair.

“We were on the road for several weeks. No food. Barely some water.” Ryan said. “Daryl and I occasionally went off to seek food and water. He caught the most animals, providing us of meat.”

Beth chuckled. “That sounds like Daryl. You know, we even had snake.”

“Snake? He managed to catch a snake?” Ryan asked, disbelieving.

“Yes. Doesn’t it sound appealing to you?” Beth said jokingly, dropping more and more hair on the ground. Ryan didn’t know his hair was that long, but trusted Beth with the scissors. 

“Very appealing.” Ryan grinned weakly. “Daryl has a great taste, and even madder cooking skills.”

“I’m glad he would skin the animals he caught, so I didn’t have to do it.” Beth said. “What he does isn’t for the weak hearted.”

“The world isn’t for the weak hearted.” Ryan said with a hint of sadness in his voice. “Eat or be eaten.”

“You’re wrong.” Dawn suddenly got in, overhearing what Ryan had said. “We take in the weaker ones. We protect them. Just like we protect the two of you.”

Both Ryan and Beth knew it was a lie, both glaring at Dawn. 

“You didn’t do shit.” Ryan growled.

“Excuse me?” Dawn said. “We saved you from these Walkers. If we weren’t there, you’d be dead by now.”

Ryan got irritated. “You overran me with your fucking car, bitch.”

This caused Dawn to snap, and hit Ryan in the face hard. 

Ryan got up from the wheelchair, way too quickly, but managed to hit Dawn pretty quickly in the face, before collapsing on the floor. He didn’t have his prosthesis on, which had caused Ryan to fall so quickly.

Ryan’s leg couldn’t hold him, and he got light in his head. 

Dawn kicked him in the gut, and left the room.

“Fucking bitch…” Ryan crawled back to the wheelchair. 

Beth didn’t deny that, and helped Ryan back into the chair. “She’s always like that.”

“I hate her.” Ryan said. “She reminds me of my mother.”

Beth got quiet, knowing Ryan’s backstory, how he saw Dawn wasn’t good. 

When Ryan saw himself in the mirror Beth had handed after finishing his haircut, he couldn’t believe his eyes. On the right side of his head was a big cut, stitched up, and his right eye was bruised purple. The most shocking was he saw himself for the first time in a long while, and he couldn’t recognise himself back. The haircut Beth had given him was very suiting for his face; it was longer on the top of his head than the side of his head. It reminded him of an undercut. 

“You like it?” Beth asked after nervously watching Ryan staring into the mirror. 

Ryan closed his eyes, and nodded, handing over the mirror again. 

“Good.” Beth accepted the mirror and put it away. “I’ll clean your wound, it might sting.”

Ryan nodded, and prepared for it, hissing when Beth started to clean it. 

“You know, Carol arrived here, too.” Beth started to speak. “Yesterday.”

Ryan looked up to Beth. “What?”

“I think she got here the same way I did.” Beth confessed. “Got hit by their car too… She’s off her meds. Dawn doesn’t want to spill the medication on her.”

“Beth.” Dawn hurried into the room. “Get changed into your old clothes.”

“What?” Beth asked, confused. “Why?”

“Do it. You’re being exchanged, together with the other lady.” Dawn left the room again.

Beth looked at Ryan, guilt in her eyes. 

“Do it.” Ryan said. “Go.”

Nodding, with tears in her eyes, Beth left the room. 

Sighing, Ryan looked around the room, and saw his prosthesis resting against the wall near his bed, boot still on it. He hurried to it, sliding over the floor, after ripping the IV from his arm and getting out of the wheelchair. 

Quickly Ryan removed the boot from his prosthesis, noticing the knife he got from Daryl was still there. It seemed like the policemen didn’t search through his boot. 

Strapping the prosthesis on, Ryan kept looking if Dawn or Gorman came in, but luckily they didn’t. 

Ryan put on his boots quickly, and even spotted his bag he had on his run. The ammo had been given to Rick before the first run, taking only a small amount with him on each run.

Of course the ammo was gone, but his regular clothes were in it. 

Ryan wanted to change, until footsteps were being heard. 

“They haven’t been harmed.” A familiar male voice said, somewhere in the hallway, indicating the exchange was starting. Ryan got up quickly, getting dizzy because he had just woken up. Quickly he grabbed a few empty bottles on the bottom of his backpack, and filled them with water. He also grabbed some medication from the little cabinet in his room, stuffing it all in his backpack. 

He knew this voice, and he knew why he was here. 

“One of yours, for one of mine.” Dawn spoke as Ryan opened the door of his room. The exchange was going on around the corner of this hall, he heard that. 

“Glad we could work things out.” Dawn spoke, followed by a ‘yeah’ from Rick. The exchange was over, Ryan had to be quick if he wanted to go with his group.

“Now I just need Noah!” Dawn suddenly said. “Then you can leave.”

“That wasn’t part of the deal.” Rick said. 

Ryan walked through the hallway, leaning on the wall. He wasn’t used to this yet. 

“I get it now.” Beth said, just as Ryan turned around the corner.

Ryan saw how Beth stabbed Dawn, and how Dawn shot Beth through the head, causing Ryan to stand still in the middle of the hallway. 

Raging, Daryl put out his own gun and shot Dawn through her head. This caused everyone to draw their weapons.

“No, hold your fire!” Another female cop said. 

“Beth!” Ryan screamed, running to her corpse, even though he was still dizzy. 

Pushing through the officers, Ryan fell next to Beth, but got up on his knees quickly. 

“Ryan?” Rick asked, only seeing the back of Ryan’s head. 

Looking up, Ryan saw Daryl’s lips trembling with emotion, Carol supporting him, and Rick looking around shocked. 

Even Rick had tears in his eyes, putting away his gun, while Daryl dropped on his knees next to Ryan, crying. 

Ryan looked at Daryl, kneeling over the body of Beth, crying, before it all got dark again. 

Rick picked up the unconscious Ryan, while Daryl picked himself together, and picked up Beth’s corpse. 

And the group left without saying another word. 

 

Ryan kept slipping in and out of conscious as the group walked out. He heard Maggie break down when she saw her dead sister, and he was fully aware Rick carried him. 

Having no energy to fight Rick, Ryan tried to open his eyes after staying conscious long enough. 

“Rick…” Ryan muttered, after looking at Rick’s face for several moments. 

“Shhh. Don’t speak yet.” Rick sushed Ryan. “It’s okay.”

Ryan followed Rick’s advice, and looked at Daryl, walking in front of them. Ryan absolutely hated to see Daryl so sad, crying even. 

Ryan was being carried into a large fire-truck, while Daryl buried Beth in a nearby grassfield. 

Everyone got in after Daryl had buried Beth, and Abraham started driving the fire-truck. It was snug to fit everyone in, but the fire-truck was big enough, luckily. 

They drove to the other side of the city, where Rick clears a van to fit several people in, while Daryl does the same with another truck. They kept Ryan and Carl safe in the fire-truck, before they were told to get into the truck.

Ryan wasn’t able to walk quickly by himself yet, so Daryl picked him up, and placed him in the back of the truck he was going to drive. 

“Daryl…” Ryan muttered as he started to slip in and out conscious again. 

Daryl didn’t answer, and got in the truck himself, starting it up, and driving behind Rick into some woods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter.  
> Also; There are some changes in the storyline here. This does not affect the timeline of The Walking Dead, and will continue following the original script again.


	9. Trust

Seventeen days the group had been on the road, until the group stopped to set up a small camp. 

Ryan was starting to feel better again after a few days, but the malnutrition didn’t help the healing process. After a week, Ryan’s purple eye had turned green, and started to fade slowly, and the wound in his head started to close up. He also hadn’t changed back into his normal clothing. The group had brought his baseball bat with them, and given it back to it’s rightful owner. 

Rick, Michonne, Tyreese, Glenn and Noah decided to go to Noah’s home, as Beth had promised to go there with Noah.

Rick handed over a communication radio to Carol, to keep communicating as the others stayed at the small camp. 

Maggie was crying at the little campfire they had made, while Daryl was on lookout together with Sasha. Carol cooked some squirrel Daryl had caught, while Ryan and Carl laid in the truck. Father Gabriel was reading his bible, and Eugene and Tara were talking in the back of the van. Abraham and Rosita were on a run. 

“Ryan?” Carl asked, facing Ryan. “How do you feel?”

“What do you think?” Ryan answered, not looking back at Carl, his mind went over and over the past few weeks, how he had woken up at the hospital, how Beth talked to him, but most of all how Gorman had stripped him and how Beth got shot. 

“I get it.” Carl said. “But you can talk to me if you want.”

“Thanks…”

“I like your haircut.” Carl suddenly blurted out. “I mean, long was nice too, but this is…”

“Better.” Ryan finished Carl’s sentence. “Thanks, I guess.”

“Who did it for you?  Someone at the hospital?” Carl continued to talk.

“Beth.” 

“Oh.” This made Carl quiet. 

“It’s a shame,” Eugene said, after picking up the last part of the conversation. 

“What?” Ryan got up to face Eugene.

“I fully respect the hair game.”

Ryan just looked at Eugene in full confusion. “What?”

“It’s a shame your long hair is gone.”

“Should have told that right away.” Ryan said, annoyed, the last few days he was grumpy. "You should get a cut yourself..."

“The smartest man I ever met happened to love my hair. My old boss, T. Brooks Ellis, the director of the Human Genome Project. He said my hair made me look like, and I quote, a fun guy, which I am.” Eugene spoke fast. 

“Oh just shut up.” Ryan laid down again. “Not rested enough to deal with this…”

Tara and Carl laughed softly, and Eugene was slightly offended.

“I’m going to relieve Daryl from his watch.” Tara said, still laughing, and got out of the van. 

After a few moments, Daryl got into the van.

“How are ya feelin’?” Daryl asked, while looking at Ryan as he was the most precious thing in the world, finally having some time with Ryan.

“As good as I look, I guess.” Ryan said. 

“Scoot.” Daryl said, climbing next to Ryan. 

When Daryl had sat down next to him, expecting Ryan to crawl up to him, but Ryan didn’t. Ryan stayed on the far end of the car. 

“What’s wrong?” Daryl asked, getting closer to Ryan, but Ryan visibly flinched and made himself a little ball. 

“Don’t touch me…” Ryan said, and rested his head against the window. 

“Ryan, what happened back there?” Daryl still got closer, suspecting what had happened back there. “Did someone touch ya… inappropriately?”

This was the que for Carl and Eugene to leave the car, so they did. 

Ryan avoided Daryl’s face, and nodded. “Someone… stripped me… Saying how he would use me as one of his girls...”

It wasn’t like Ryan was scared of Daryl, he was just scared to get the memories of Gorman back.

Daryl’s heart dropped. Of all people, Ryan got it again.

“I don’t think I want to live anymore…”

Daryl pulled up his legs. “I know.”

Ryan looked up, to see Daryl sitting like that, and being sad. 

“I love ya, Ryan.” Daryl said, looking into Ryan’s eyes. “I love ya.”

Biting his lip, Ryan couldn’t break the eye contact. “I… Love you too…”

Ryan launched himself at Daryl, hugging him closely, crying on his chest. 

Daryl hadn’t expected this reaction, but held Ryan as close as possible, allowing him to cry as much as he needed. 

“It’s okay…” Daryl stroked Ryan’s hair, and occasionally kissed him on his head. 

After a while of crying, Ryan had fallen asleep on Daryl’s chest. 

Carol opened the door on the opposite side of the car. “The others are coming back. The place is gone, and Tyreese has been bit. His arm is off but we need to stop the bleeding.”

Daryl nodded. “Thanx, Carol.”

“How is he doing?” Carol asked, nodding to Ryan.

“Sleepin’.” Daryl said. “Cried a lot.”

“That’s unlike him.” Carol said. “He usually hides his emotions, doesn’t he?”

“Yeah…”

 

Tyreese didn’t make it. He had died on the way back to the small camp, peacefully while looking at the sunset. The group had noticed quick, and killed his brain quickly after, before he could turn. 

Once reunited all together, Tyreese got buried under a nice tree, his beany on the cross. Ryan stood next to Daryl during the burial, holding his hand and looking silently how Tyreese got covered with a white sheet, and got buried. 

After the burial, the group had to move on again. The area had been picked clean, and rarely there would be any supplies. 

Everyone was weak and exhausted as the group drove a little over half a day, only to be stopped once the vehicle’s ran out of gas. 

The group continued on foot, and over the time they even attracted a small group of Walkers behind them. 

“Are you holdin’ up?” Daryl asked an exhausted Ryan. 

“Like a Walker, but not dead.” Ryan said, barely holding up with the group. 

“‘M gonna go out to get water, ‘n food.” Daryl said. “Hold on, ‘kay?”

Ryan nodded, and watched Daryl walk to Rick to say he was going out.

“I’ll go with you.” Carol said, following Daryl.

“I got it.” Daryl simply said, but didn’t bother to stop Carol.

The group of Walkers stalking the group became bigger, so the group decided to get rid of them near a bridge. The strongest participated in getting rid of them, while the weaker waited for it to be over. The weaker group included Ryan, who collapsed on the floor while the Walkers were dealt with. 

Tara kneeled next to Ryan, who tried to get up. 

“Don’t. Spare your energy for now.” She said. “When we’ll go, I’ll support you.”

It took a moment for Ryan to accept. 

After being on the road for a while again, Daryl and Carol had joined them again, until the group came across some cars. 

“These might have supplies in them.” Rick said, and everyone took a car.

“Imma head out again.” Daryl said. 

“Can I come?” Carol asked again. 

“No, just me.” Daryl cut her off, and left. 

Ryan didn’t have energy to search a car for supplies, so Tara put him against one in the shadow, and started searching in one herself.

 

The group had settled down, a few miles from the spot where the cars were. 

Daryl had come back from his run, and his eyes met with Rick, who was about to point his gun at Daryl, thinking he was a Walker. The two shook their heads as Daryl joined the group on the ground, Daryl hadn’t found anything. His eyes rested on Ryan’s body, who laid on the ground while Tara looked over him. 

“Still isn’t the old one, huh?” Daryl sat down in front of Tara.

“He still hasn’t healed properly. His body doesn’t have the energy.” Tara stroke some hairs from Ryan’s face. “His black eye didn’t fade away yet…”

“‘S gonna take a while without water ‘n food.” Daryl said, worried. 

Suddenly, a pack of wild dogs appeared, aggressively barking at the group, waking Ryan up too, who reached out for his bat.

Before anyone could do something, Sasha shot the dogs, startling Daryl who was in hunter-mode. 

Ryan had gotten up half, but dropped himself again. “Fucking dogs…”

Moments later, the group did have some roasted meat. 

“Here.” Daryl gave some meat to Ryan, who tried to get up. “Sit against my back.” 

Ryan nodded, and did as Daryl told. By sitting against Daryl’s back, Ryan managed to sit up right, and started eating, instantly feeling better.

Glenn handed a half full bottle of water to Ryan “Here.”

“You should drink yourself.” Ryan said, looking at Glenn. “Don’t worry about me.”

“Don’t be stubborn,” Glenn said. “You need it the most.”

“He’s right.” Daryl said. “I’ll pour ‘t in ya if ya don’t drink.”

Ryan accepted the bottle, and drank two sips before he handed it back. “Thanks.”

“Keep it.” Glenn said. “I found another one too.”

Nodding, Ryan put it in his backpack, on top of his clothes. 

 

The next morning, the group got up at sunrise, and started walking again. Ryan actually got some sleep, which felt like a miracle. He was able to walk on his own without help.

“Here.” Glenn held out a bottle of water out for Daryl. 

“Don’t need.” Daryl declined. 

“Daryl.” Glenn pressured. 

“Don’t do that.” Daryl said, passing Glenn. 

“Hey.” Glenn said before Daryl was in front of him. “We can make it together. But only together.”

“Tell ‘em I’m looking for water.” Daryl said to Ryan, who nodded.

Luckily, the day wasn’t too sunny, as there were lots of clouds.

“He’s looking for water.” Ryan passed on to Abraham. “So am I.”

Quickly Ryan followed Daryl. It didn’t take long before Ryan had found Daryl, sitting against a tree.

Without saying a word, Ryan joined him, which Daryl noticed, but continued smoking his cigarette. 

Daryl even pressed the lighted cigarette into his left hand, and Ryan didn’t stop him. Ryan knew Daryl was mourning right now, and started crying.

When Daryl was done, and got up, he helped Ryan up. 

“Thanx…” Daryl said. “For just bein’ here.”

“Hm.” Ryan answered, grabbing Daryl’s hand. 

Both caught up with the group pretty quickly, as they were standing still. 

Rick handed Daryl a paper, saying ‘FROM A FRIEND’.

“Eugene, what are you doing?” Someone said.

“Quality insurance.” Eugene said, wanting to check if the water wasn’t poisonous. 

Abraham made his way to Eugene, and smacked the water bottle out of his hands. “We can’t.”

Before anyone could say something, drips of water were falling. 

It started to rain. 

Tara and Rosita laid down in the rain, enjoying the blessing, while the others just enjoyed the rain, and smiled. 

“Everyone, grab the bags.” Rick said, grabbing bottles and containers himself. “Quick.”

Lots of bottles were being placed to catch the water, but it was soon interrupted as thunder started. 

“Let’s keep moving.” Rick said, as Ryan looked at Daryl.

“There is a barn!” Daryl yelled over the sound of thunder and heavy rain. 

“Where?” Rick asked. 

 

Daryl lead the group to the barn, and when Rick entered it to make sure it was clear, it already was clear, except for one Walker. 

There was a storm going on outside when everyone got into the barn, and made a small campfire. 

Carl had fallen asleep with Judith near the campfire, as Maggie, Sasha and Abraham had separated themselves from the group. Ryan laid on the opposite side of Carl, back facing the entrance of the barn, bag under his head for support while trying to catch some sleep. 

Ryan instantly woke up when he heard Walker noises from outside the barn. Looking around, he saw Daryl trying to keep the door closed for the incoming Walkers. Ryan ran to Daryl to help him, pushing against the door too.

“Not my family…” Ryan verbally reminded himself, and Maggie joined the two by helping to push. 

Everyone, even Carl, came to help to push against the door, keeping the Walkers out.

 

The next morning was quiet. Daryl had carried Ryan with him to the opposite side of the barn. The Walkers were gone, and everyone was sleeping. 

Daryl laid Ryan down on some ‘soft’ hay sacks, and sat next to him the entire night.  After Maggie had woken up, and told Daryl it was okay to sleep now, Daryl joined Ryan.

“Hey…” Ryan whispered. 

“Sleep.” Daryl said. “Jus’ joinin’ ya.”

Daryl laid next to Ryan, arm over Ryan’s waist to keep him close, and closed his eyes.

Ryan did the same, and snuggled a bit closer to Daryl. 

It was a little while until Daryl got up again, decided he had enough sleep and started to ‘play’ with his crossbow.

Carol, Ryan and Abraham were cleaning their weapons, while the others were minding their own business. 

“Hey, everyone.” Maggie came back into the barn, with an unknown guy, and Sasha who had her gun up. “This is Aaron.”

Daryl was the first one to act up, checking if someone was following them, and started to pat Aaron down for any weapons he might have, while the others were on their feet, holding up guns and being wary of his every move..

“Met him outside, he’s by himself.” Maggie continued. “We took his weapons and gear.”

“Hi.” Aaron awkwardly said, having his hands up, still from the search Daryl performed on him. Judith started to cry, getting Ryan on his nerves. Carl quickly took Judith from Rick, and managed to get her silent again. 

“It’s nice to meet you.” Aaron stepped forward, to Rick, holding his hand out, Daryl hot on his feet. 

“What kind of weapon?” Rick asked. Maggie handed over a small hand gun. 

“Is there something you need?” Rick asked after inspecting the gun, and putting it in his waistband. 

“He has a camp, nearby.” Sasha spoke. “He wants us to audition to join.”

“I wish there was another word, audition makes it sound as if we’re some sort of dance crew.” Aaron said with a slight smile, quickly fading. “That’s only on Friday nights.”

“You have a dance night?” Ryan asked almost in disgust. It was one of the strangest things he had heard after the world went to shit. 

Aaron felt awkward, especially since the group had been out there since the beginning. “Yeah…”

Ryan shook his head. 

“A-and it’s not a camp. It’s a community.” Aaron added. ”I think you all would make valuable additions, but it’s not my call. My job is to convince you to follow me back home.”

Rick started to move around uncomfortably, while Aaron continued talking.

“I know. If I were you I wouldn’t come either. Not before knowing what I was getting into. Sasha, can you hand Rick my bag?”

Sasha handed over the bag. “In the front pocket is an envelope. There is no way for me to convince you to come with me by just talking. That’s why I brought those. I advice in advance for the picture quality. We just have an old...”

“We don’t give a shit.” Daryl growled from behind Aaron, while Rick opened the envelope, and looked at the pictures.

“You’re absolutely 100% right.” Aaron looked back, talking to Daryl. Ryan sighed, and rolled his eyes. 

“Sugarcoating much…” Ryan muttered, looking at Aaron with piercing eyes, who continued talking about the pictures.

Rick started to move forward towards Aaron, still holding the pictures, as Aaron continued to talk, and punched Aaron right in the face, knocking him out effectively. 

Daryl tied up the unconscious man, while Rick gave orders, wanting eyes in every direction. 

“That’s a hell of a right cross there, Rick.” Aaron was back on earth again, and started speaking again. 

“Someone shut him up.” Ryan growled, pacing around irritated before getting outside to guard the barn doors. 

It took a while, but Rick had send people to search the area to see if Aaron lied about two cars or something. Ryan didn’t catch it, and stayed to guard the doors. 

After quite a while, two vehicles were driving towards the barn. Ryan was ready to defend the place, but quickly noticed it was the group returning. 

The group unloaded a lot of canned foods, which made Ryan his mouth water, probably everyone’s mouth water.

“This.” Rick held up a can for Aaron to see. ”Is ours now.”

“There is more than enough.” Aaron said, nodding.

“It’s ours, even if we go to your camp or not.” 

“What do you mean, why wouldn’t we go?” Carl asked.

“If he were lying, or if he wanted to hurt us… But he isn’t, and he doesn’t.” Michonne said, looking around the group. “We need this. So we’re going. All of us. Someone say something if they feel differently.”

“I don’t know man.” Daryl said. “This barn smells like horse-shit.”

“Yeah… We’re going.” Rick said, eventually. “So where are we going? Where is your camp?”

“Every time I’ve done this I’ve been behind the wheel to take people there.” Aaron said after being asked by Rick. “I bet you are good people, I’d bet my life on you, but I’m not ready to bet my friends life…”

“You’re not driving.” Michonne cut Aaron off. “So if you want to get home, you’ll have to tell us how.”

Rick grabbed a map, while Aaron explained. “Go north on Route 16.”

“And then?” Michonne pressured.

“I’ll tell you when we get there.” Aaron smiled awkwardly.

“We’ll take 23 north.” Rick spoke.  “You’ll give us directions from there.”

“That’s… I don’t know how else to say, but that’s a bad idea.” Aaron said. “We’ve cleared 16. That way is faster.”

“We’ll take 23.” Rick said. “Leave at sundown.”

“We’re doing this at night?” Ryan questioned Rick.

“I know it’s dangerous.” Rick said. “But it’s better than driving up to the gates during the day. We need to be gone before they know we were there, in case it goes bad.”

“No one is going to hurt you. You’re trying to protect your group but you’re putting them in danger.” Aaron objected.

“Tell me where the camp is, we’ll leave right now.” Rick said, but Aaron stayed quiet. “It’s gonna be a long night. Eat. Get some rest if you can.” Rick left the barn.

Ryan didn’t have to be told twice to eat, and got himself a can of canned food. It tasted so good, Ryan wanted to gobble down the entire can at once. Instantly, he was in a good mood.

“Don’t eat to quickly.” Carol warned. 

“Yes ma’am.” Ryan replied, and stuffed his face again, causing Carol to smirk. 

“Ryan, I need to speak to you for a second.” Rick’s face turned around the door of the barn. 

“On my way.” Ryan put the can down, licking his fingers as he walked towards the door. 

Rick was walking around, going with a hand through his hair. “How do you feel about this? About that community?”

“Why do you ask me?” Ryan asked. 

“I trust your opinion, and since you’ve been through alot, yours counts just a little more than others.” Rick stated, concerned about how Ryan felt about the whole community story. 

Ryan thought about it for a second. “All he said was true. I think we should give it a shot.”

Rick nodded. “What if it turned out all a lie?”

“Then we fight our way out, like we always do, Rick.” Ryan said. “Have a little faith.”

That coming from Ryan, meant a lot to Rick, so he nodded. “Thanx, Ryan.”

“Anytime.” Ryan turned around to get into the barn again. “I’m gonna finish my can. Eat something too.”

 

“The barn really reeks like horse-shit.” Daryl complained when Ryan asked him about it.

“You haven’t showered in over a year, Daryl.” Ryan smirked, nudging Daryl softly. “Shouldn’t complain about a smelly shelter. It doesn’t even smell that bad.”

“Choose which is better; my smell or the smell of this barn?” Daryl asked, with also a smirk on his face.

“Yours.” Ryan said with his mouth full. 

“See.” Daryl said victorious. 

Ryan rolled his eyes, laughing. “Can I change my answer?”

“Nah.” 

The group watched how the two of them were talking about little stuff.

“They are really bonding, aren’t they?” Maggie said, sharing a can of food with Glenn. “It’s good to see Ryan open up so much.”

“Pretty sure they are together.” Tara said, sitting near the two. “They fit well together.”

“Yeah, but Daryl said he isn’t gay.” Glenn argued. 

“Bisexual, maybe?” Tara pulled up her shoulders. 

“As long as they are happy.” Maggie said, holding hands with Glenn.

“That’s the most important.” Glenn added, and put some food in his mouth. 

“Being gay is a sin.” Father Gabriel entered the conversation.

“Oh shut up.” Maggie said, shutting Gabriel up. She had been very annoyed by him the past few weeks. 

Gabriel didn’t say anything more, and just sat by himself again. 

 

That night, the group split up to fit in the vehicles. Rick took Glenn, Michonne and Aaron in the car, Glenn driving, while the rest drove in the big camper Abraham was driving. 

Carl had been sleeping on the bed in the end of the camper, with Judith safely in his arms, while Ryan sat on the opposite bed together with Daryl, holding hands. Daryl actually had his eyes closed as he rested his head against the camper wall. 

Ryan was about to close his eyes too when the van made a quick stop, and making a sharp turn. 

“What’s going on?” Ryan asked as Tara walked into the back to check on Carl and Judith. 

“Walkers.” Tara answered, relieved Carl and Judith were okay, despite being awake right now. “Glenn drove straight through them though.” 

“What?” Daryl asked, confused, as he had just woken up violently from his well deserved sleep. 

“Don’t worry about it.” Tara said. “We’re driving to safety.”

“Where is safety?” Carl asked, still laying on the bed. 

“I don’t know…” Tara honestly answered.

“There!” Eugene suddenly shouted. 

“I can hear just fine, Porter.” Abraham said back, annoyed. “And I can see just as good.”

Eugene didn’t say anything back.

After a while of driving, the caravan stopped. 

Abraham, Rosita, and Maggie got out to clear the area. It had appeared the flare from the flare-gun had been shot here.

“It’s clear, and I need bandages!” Maggie said. “Follow me inside.” Everyone got outside, and Ryan took some bandages from his hospital haul with him, notifying Maggie he had them.

“Good, follow me.”

Daryl stood outside, and held watch as everyone else went inside. In a back room was a guy, biting his lip in pain. 

“Are you Aaron’s friend?” Maggie asked, while setting his foot. 

“Yes.” The red-blond guy said with a soft smile. “I’m Eric. Eric Raleigh.”

“Maggie.” Maggie introduced herself. “Ryan, hand me over the bandages.”

Ryan did as he was told.

“Thank you, Maggie and Ryan.” Eric smiled. 

Suddenly, Daryl slammed on the outside door, causing Ryan and Maggie to run to him. 

Before they could ask what was wrong, Maggie saw Glenn, alive and well, and hugged him tightly. 

“Dad!” Carl slipped past Daryl and Ryan to hug his dad. 

“Eric?” Aaron started panicking. “Eric?!”

“Inside.” Eric’s voice came from the back room, and Aaron rushed inside, concerning Rick, who followed him. 

Ryan stayed outside with Daryl. 

“Ya need to catch some sleep.” Daryl said. “Ya’re almost fully recovered.”

“Yes, papa Daryl.” Ryan said, while rolling his eyes, but was fluttered because Daryl was so caring for him. 

Daryl smirked. “Sassy.”

Ryan stepped inside, and found a place on the ground to sleep.

 

The next morning the group left again. They had found another car, which was taken by Rick, Michonne and Glenn. The others sat in the camper. Eric laid on the bed, fast asleep, while Aaron looked out for him.

“Here.” Ryan said, holding some painkillers and water out for Aaron.

“Oh, ehm.” Aaron muttered. “I’d rather let Eric sleep... wait until we’re home.”

“These aren’t for him.” Ryan said. “For you.” 

“Oh. Thanks.” Aaron said, and accepted them, knowing Ryan was giving the painkillers for his wrists. Rick had tied Aaron up pretty tightly.

Ryan turned around and wanted to walk away again, before being stopped by Aaron.

“Ryan.” Aaron spoke. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Giving no answer, Ryan stood still. 

“Why did Rick value your opinion more than others about Alexandria?”

“You overheard him?” Ryan asked. 

“Well, kinda.”

“Then you should know enough.” Ryan said, walking back again, taking his place at the table next to Carol, who was staring at Eugene explaining a card game. 

“Abraham, look.” Rosita said, pointing in the distance. Ryan looked out of the window too, to see the Washington Monument. “Eyes on the road, champ.”

“How much longer we got?” Abraham asked, after noticing the low battery light turn on. 

“Looks like we’re little over halfway there. Why?” Rosita said, looking on the map she had. 

“We’re gonna make it.”

Ryan smiled. The travel was going in their favor, which meant they would be at the community before sundown, before noon maybe.

Not long after the camper ran out of battery, and everyone got out. 

“Can’t win.” Abraham smashed the camper. “Might as well paint it red with a ladder on it.”

“All it needs is a new battery.” Glenn added.

“Where the hell are we gonna find another battery.” Abraham said, irritated, knowing it would be hard to find another battery in this area. 

“Right over here.” Glenn said, and patted Abraham on the shoulder before walking to the side of the camper, opening a small door in the floor of the entrance of the camper. 

“How did you know that?” Abraham asked, but Glenn didn’t answer. 

“Hey Ryan.” Maggie said. “Can I talk to you?”

Ryan nodded, and walked over to Maggie, who separated from the group. 

“How was she?” Maggie asked. “Beth, in the hospital.”

Ryan swallowed, not really ready to speak about it, but did for the sake of Maggie. “She talked to me when I was in a coma. About her days with Daryl. She did got bossed around by the lady in charge.”

“Oh my God.” Maggie said, having her hands over her mouth. 

“Beth stayed strong.” Ryan said. “She cut my hair, and made sure my wounds kept clean.”

Maggie smiled, sadly, and nodded. “She was as sweet as always, wasn’t she?”

“She was.” Ryan smiled softly.

“Thank you, Ryan.” Maggie hugged Ryan, who awkwardly hugged back. “That’s what I needed to hear.”

“Can you let me go now?” Ryan asked uneasy, not wanting to insult Maggie. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot.” She quickly let Ryan go.

“Don’t worry about it.” 

The two of them walked back to the group again. Daryl stood against the camper, smoking. 

“Havin’ a thin’ for Maggie?” Daryl grinned. 

Ryan rolled his eyes. “Yeah, definitely.” 

Daryl looked at Ryan for a second, noting his excellent acting, grinned, and softly pushed Ryan. “Yeah right.”

“Guys, we’re good to go.” Glenn gathered everyone, after waiting for Rick to come-back from his alone-moment.

Once everyone was in, Abraham started driving again, behind Rick, Michonne, Carl and Judith in the other car. 

Pretty quickly, they stood in front of a gate. 

Ryan was one of the first to exit the camper, and while he stood in front of the gate, he closed his eyes, and simply listened to the sounds. 

Laughter of children were faint, which caused him to open his eyes again. It really was a community, and even though Ryan didn’t like kids, he was glad. 

The group approached the now opening gate, and walked in, still on their guard. 

Aaron helped Eric on his feet, and guided him inside. 

A opossum startled the group, but Daryl shot it, while the gate-guard looked at them questioned.

“Brought dinner.” Daryl said, when he saw the questioning look on the guard’s face, and held up the opossum.

Awkwardly, it stayed silent, until Aaron broke the silence. “It’s okay. Come on in, guys.”

Once everyone was in, the gate closed, probably to keep Walkers from attacking.

“Okay, before we take this any further, we need you to turn over your guns, guys.” The guard said, with brown curls and a thin mustache. “If you wanna stay, hand them over.”

“We don’t know if we wanna stay.” Rick said, having Judith on his hip. 

“It’s okay, Nicolas.” Aaron said to the guard.

“If we were to use them, we would have already.” Rick said. 

“Let them talk to Deanna first.” Aaron said to Nicolas.

“Who the hell is Deanna?” Abraham asked. 

“She knows everything you wanna know about this place.” Aaron spoke to the group. “Rick, why don’t you start?”

Rick looked behind him, to the group, but also noticed a Walker outside of the gate. “Sasha.”

Sasha turned around, and shot the Walker down with her silenced weapon, before the blinding gate slid close.

“It’s a good thing we’re here…” Rick muttered, and followed Aaron.

While Rick was inside Deanna’s house to talk to her, Ryan looked around the place. The Safe-Zone was clean and well looked after. 

“What’ya say?” Daryl stood next to Ryan, looking around. 

“It’s clean.” Ryan said. “So far I like it.”

“Hm.” Daryl hummed, not really knowing what to think of this place. 

A full lady came walking with a trolley. 

“If you could place your guns here, we’ll store them for you.” She said, insecure. 

Deanna soon joined the lady, and explained more. “If you go on a run, you can take yours with you.”

Ryan place his gun and ammo on the trolley, but since they didn’t say ‘weapons’ in general, he didn’t give his bat and knife. Daryl also didn’t give up his crossbow, keeping it with him.

Daryl was next up for a talk with Deanna, while Rick and Carl got with Aaron to see some houses. 

Ryan had followed Rick and Carl, and checked out the houses. Carl called dibs on the shower, and came out of it pretty quickly, clean clothes and smelling nice. 

“Ugh, dad, go shower, you reek.” Carl laughed after coming out of the shower. 

Rick laughed, and went to the shower. 

“You should shower too, Ryan.” Carl said. “You also reek.”

Ryan snickered. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Come.” Carl said, and took Ryan to the second house, where Ryan started to shower, and Carl started to explore. 

Also Ryan had found some clean clothes, and had shaved his stubble. Showering had been quite a trick, since he had to take off his prosthesis, but just as he did in the prison, he removed it, and leaned against the wall for support. He stared at himself in the mirror. Maggie had taken out the stitches from his head-wound, and all he saw now was a scar, covered with his blonde hair.

“Ryan?” Carl called, from downstairs. 

“In the bathroom, cleaning up!” Ryan shouted back, and got out of the bathroom, prosthesis in hand and leaning against the wall while jumping towards the stairs. 

“He’s cleaning up.” Ryan heard Carl say. 

“I’ll wait out for him.” Daryl’s voice said. 

“Daryl!” Ryan almost shouted, and got down the stairs, still without prosthesis. 

Once Ryan was downstairs, he put on his prosthesis, and walked to Daryl. 

“Deanna wanted to see ya.” Daryl said. “I’ll walk ya.”

Ryan became nervous, but followed Daryl. 

“She won’t bite, ya know.” Daryl sensed Ryan’s nervousness.

“You never know these days.” Ryan said, clinging on to Daryl as they walked into her house.

“Ryan, good to see you cleaned up.” Deanna said, and came forward. “I’m Deanna Monroe.”

Ryan looked at Daryl, who nodded at him. Deanna was a short woman, around her 50’s, with shoulder length, well looked after, brown-red hair. Her appearance was generally well looked after; clean clothes, clean nails, and even a necklace.

“Ryan…” Ryan introduced himself, standing half behind Daryl. 

“Come, sit.” Deanna invited Ryan, and walked to a camera. “Do you mind if I record our talk?”

Shaking his head, Ryan walked to the chair, not sitting down yet, looking around. “Can he stay?”

“I want to talk without any influence,” Deanna said. “He can stay outside until we are done.”

Ryan took a moment, before nodding. Daryl walked out, and Deanna took her seat. “So, Ryan. Do you like it here so far?”

Carefully, Ryan sat down, and nodded. “Yeah…”

“Good to hear,” Deanna smiled. “Your friend Daryl said you’re the one who deserves this the most, together with Rick and his children. Do you know why he said that?”

Ryan thought of Daryl. “I guess so… But everyone deserves it...” 

“Can you tell me why he says you deserve it the most, together with Rick and his children?”

“Rick took care of us, saved us….” Ryan got cut off by Deanna.

“I meant why he said that about you.”

Ryan stayed quiet, and tensed up. “I’d rather not talk about it…”

“Please…”

“No!” Ryan shouted, and got up. Daryl stormed in after hearing Ryan’s distress. 

“I told ya not to ask about it!” Daryl growled to Deanna. 

“Daryl, I know, but I had to try.” Deanna said in defense. “And I’m sorry.”

Daryl escorted Ryan out, back to the house where he had showered. 

“Ya okay?”

“No.” Ryan said, on the verge of crying. He had started to forget all what happened. He put it away behind walls, and as long as nobody talked about it, it would be fine. Or so Ryan thought. 

“It’s okay, Ryan.” Daryl knew better than to touch Ryan at this moment. “‘M here for ya.”

Ryan nodded. “I know.”

“What happened?” Carl ran outside of the ‘first’ house.

“Don’t.” Daryl warned. 

Carl nodded, and walked Ryan into the second home. 

“Thanx.” Ryan said, sitting down on the couch, next to Carol. 

By the time it got dark, Glenn got some pillows from the couch, and put them on the ground to sleep on. The group had decided not to split up into two houses. Ryan had expressed to sleep upstairs, alone, but knew Daryl would stay close to him. Especially after what happened with Deanna.

Someone knocked on the door, startling some of the group. Rick opened, while Ryan looked over his shoulder to see who it was.

“Rick, I…” Deanna stood in the door opening, and saw the shaven face of Rick. “Wow. I didn’t know what was under there.” Deanna was surprised how Rick looked right now. “I didn’t want to disturb you, I just came to stop by to see how everyone is settling in.” She looked around the room. “You’re staying together? Smart.”

“Is that okay?” Rick asked, without little room in his voice for contradiction from Deanna. 

“You said you are family. I’m amazed to see so many people with such different backgrounds, having nothing in common can become that. Don’t you think?”

“Everyone said you’ve given them jobs.” Rick said. 

“Yeah, to be a part of this place.” Deanna smiled. “Looks like the communists have won after all.”

“You haven given me one.” Rick commented.

“I have.” Deanna nodded. “I just haven’t told you yet. Same with Michonne, and closing in on a job for Sasha. And I’m just trying to figure mister Dixon and Ryan out, but I will.” Deanna turned around to leave. “You look good.”

 

At night, both Ryan and Daryl sat against the headboard of the bed Ryan had claimed, for the night. Ryan didn’t want to sleep due to this afternoon’s happening. 

“You should take a shower…” Ryan said in order to break the silence between the two. 

“Nah.” Daryl said. 

“Why not?” Ryan asked, looking at Daryl.

“I don’t know.”

It became silent again, and Ryan yawned, being pretty tired.

“Go to sleep.” Daryl said, looking at Ryan this time. “Ya need it.”

“I don’t wanna.”

“Is it because of the talk with Deanna?”

“Everything I want to forget just came up again.” Ryan muttered, plucking some dirt from under his fingernails. 

“Forgettin’ is hard.” Daryl said. “Acceptin’ is easier… but still hard.”

Daryl suddenly got up, and started to undress his upper body, scaring Ryan.

“No… Please…” Ryan almost started to cry, thinking of the worst, until he saw the bare back of Daryl. Ryan’s eyes opened up wide. Daryl had told Ryan about his scars before they had found the prison, but Ryan never had seen them. 

They were worse than Ryan had expected. “Daryl...”

“Ya see… I wanted to forget… But acceptin’ was easier to do. Made me who I am.”

“Can I…?” Daryl knew what he was going to ask. 

“Yeah.”

Ryans soft fingers followed the lines on his back, while Daryl shivered at the gentle touch. 

“Try to do what I couldn’t do…” Daryl said, staring out of the window. “Talk about it. Ain’t have to be me, just talk to someone.”

Ryan could feel it; Daryl was very vulnerable right now. Slowly, Ryan got on his knees, and softly kissed each scar. 

“I love you, Daryl Dixon.” Ryan breathed, and after softly kissing each scar, Ryan hugged Daryl from behind. 

“Ryan…”

“Shhhh… Not now.” Ryan said, enjoying the intimacy and the quiet atmosphere.

Daryl gently held the hands of Ryan, and felt Ryan’s body warmth through Ryan’s clothes on his bare back. 

Eventually, Ryan had fallen asleep on top of Daryl’s back. Gently, Daryl laid Ryan down under the covers of the bed, and got in himself too, on the other side. 


	10. Welcome to Alexandria

The next morning Ryan woke up to see the face of Daryl near his face, staring right back at him. The two of them had slept pretty good. Even Daryl could say he was well rested, even though it was still dark outside. 

“Mornin’.” Daryl stroked some hairs from Ryan’s face. “How do ya feel?”

“Rested.” Ryan answered, and crawled forward to kiss Daryl gently on the lips. “You?”

“Hm, same.” Daryl smiled softly. “Imma get fresh air, ya comin’?”

“Yeah.” Ryan said, and slowly got up, strapping his prosthesis on while Daryl put his flannel and leather jacket on. 

The two of them quietly got downstairs, and made it out without waking anyone. 

Sitting against the wooden porch-fence, the two of them saw the sun come up, introducing the day.

Slowly, the Alexandria Safe-Zone got awake, and so did the group. Carl came out of the garage with a child-trolley, and started to stroll for a bit. Maggie, Noah and Glenn got out too, for a morning walk, followed by Rick. 

“They said explore.” Rick said. “Let’s explore.”

“Nah, I’m staying.” Daryl said, and Ryan nodded.

“Lori and me, we used to drive through neighborhoods like this, thinking one day…”

“Here we are.” Daryl said, not really showing sympathy, but Rick was used to that.

“We’ll be back.” Rick excused himself and walked off the porch. 

Ryan got up and stretched. “I need to talk to Deanna.”

“Why?” Daryl looked up.

“I’ve been thinking about what you’ve said this night.” Ryan showed a weak smile, and left off. 

Luckily for Ryan he saw Deanna walking through the neighborhood, talking to Aaron.

“Deanna.” Ryan said, while approaching them. “Aaron.”

“Good morning, Ryan.” Deanna said, smiling. “How can we help you?”

“Good morning,” Ryan answered. “Can we talk?”

“I’ll leave you two be.” Aaron said, and walked off. “Speak to you around noon, Deanna!”

“Yes, Aaron!” Deanna shouted after him. “Of course, Ryan. What do you want to talk about.”

Ryan looked around him awkwardly. “Can we talk somewhere more private?”

Deanna nodded, motioned Ryan to follow her, into her house again. 

“Sit if you’d like.” She said friendly, and took place on her couch again. “Tell me. If you don’t mind, I’ll be recording this talk too.”

Ryan nodded. “Sorry about yesterday…” Ryan started off. “I… Yeah… Had a rough life.”

“I know.” Deanna said with sympathy. “Daryl and Rick both told me something like that.”

“Well… Daryl advised me to talk about it with someone…” Ryan nervously said. 

“You could talk with Father Gabriel?” Deanna proposed, but as Ryan shook his head, she proposed another person. “Denise, one of our residents used to be a psychiatrist, you could also approach her?”

Ryan nodded. “I will, thank you.”

“You could also talk to me, if you’d like.”

Choosing to fight his trauma, Ryan looked Deanna in the eye, and talked. 

“You wanted to know what happened to me. I got abused by my mother and her boyfriend until the day they died, lost a part of my left leg, got groupraped several times by a group after the world had ended, and I got harassed by a police officer.” Ryan said without his voice breaking.

Deanna wanted to open her mouth to say something, disbelieving what she had just heard.

Ryan got up, and walked away. 

“Thank you for your time, by the way.” He added before leaving.

It took a while for Deanna to shove her disbelief away, and turn off her camera. 

Ryan, on the other hand, felt like he was a waterfall, ready to spill all his life experience to anyone. On his way from Deanna’s house, he found Rick.

“Rick.” Ryan shouted, and jogged towards him. “Do you know where Aaron lives?”

“Yeah, come with me.” Rick said. “Is everything okay?”

“Kinda.” Ryan said, taking a deep breath. 

“It was a good call to come here.” Rick said, in which Ryan agreed. 

“Your kids can grow up here. I’ve even seen someone walking their dog.”

“There is even a school.” Rick said. “Not an official school though, but it’s something.”

“Yeah.”

Rick stopped in front of Aaron and Eric’s house. “He and Eric live here, do you need me to stay?” Rick offered, knowing Ryan was uncomfortable around guys, especially alone. 

“No, thanx.” Ryan said, stepping towards the front door, before knocking on it. 

Rick nodded. “Shout if you need something, I’ll be near.”

“Don’t worry. I can take care of myself.” Ryan said. 

“Ryan.” Aaron opened the door. “How can I help you?”

Rick trusted it would go well, so he left. 

“Do you know where Denise is?” Ryan asked. “I don’t know her, but Deanna recommended her.”

“Yeah, let me take you to her.” Aaron said, closing the door behind him. “Usually she’s around the infirmary.”

“No idea where that is.” 

“That’s why I’m taking you there. Follow me.” Aaron laughed, and put his hand on Ryan’s shoulder.

“Don’t touch me!” Ryan shook himself loose, and stepped aside from Aaron.

“Shit, sorry.” Aaron held his hands up in the air. 

Four houses further, Ryan saw Daryl jumping up, crossbow in hand while staring at the two’s direction.

“Come, I’ll show you where the infirmary is.” Aaron walked off the steps, onto the streets. Quickly Ryan followed him. 

“Hi, I’m Denise.” A fuller, dirty blonde lady with glasses said, holding out her hand, once the two had arrived at the infirmary.

“I’m Ryan.” Ryan said, not touching her. 

“He doesn’t like to be touched,” Aaron said after seeing Denise looking at him, questions in her eyes. “Found out the hard way.” Aaron laughed awkwardly. 

“Oh okay.” Denise pulled her hand back. “So, Ryan, how can I help you?”

“Heard you were a psychiatrist.” Ryan said. “Maybe you can help me.”

“O-okay.” Denise said, not expecting that. “Take a seat, Ryan.” 

Seeing some bar-chairs in what used to be the kitchen, Ryan took a seat, while Denise grabbed a note-block and a pencil.

“I’ll leave you guys at it.” Aaron said, and left.

“Thanks.” Ryan said, observing Denise.

“I’ll write the important pieces you’ll tell me down, okay?” She asked, and sat down on the kitchen-bar as well. “It’ll help me help you.”

Ryan nodded. “Where do I start?”

“Tell me why you want to talk to me.”

 

Ryan had told his backstory without any details to Denise, who wrote a lot down.

“I think we’ll wrap it up for today,” Denise said, smiling softly. “Thank you for opening up to me.”

Ryan was struggling with emotions after going over his backstory lightly. “Yeah…”

“I’ll be helping you in sessions.” Denise said. “Your story is quite a story, you know. Getting to accept what happened to you will take quite a while.”

Nodding, Ryan looked at the note-block. “Will you be able to help me?”

“Yes.” Denise said without hesitating. “I’ve seen more cases like this, and you’re going to be fine.” 

Ryan looked up, lightly smiling. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Denise smiled back. “Next session, we’ll dive further into your childhood, if that’s okay with you.”

“Yes.” Ryan said. “It won’t be fun though…”

“I know.” Denise her look saddened. “Shall we continue with that tomorrow?”

Ryan looked at her. “Yeah, sure.”

“Great! I’ll see you tomorrow then. How about noon?”

Nodding, Ryan got up. “Sounds good, I guess.”

Denise saw him out, and Ryan walked around Alexandria for a bit, feeling relieved he got taken seriously by Denise, unlike other psychiatrists he had seen before the New World.

“Hey.” Daryl suddenly walked next to Ryan. “Ya okay?”

“Yeah, why?” Ryan stopped walking, and looked at Daryl.

“Aaron touched you, didn’t he?”

Ryan looked at Daryl with questions in his eyes. 

“Heard ya.” Daryl scratched his head. “Thought he touched ya without ya permission.”

Grinning, Ryan spoke. “That’s why you suddenly jumped up, right.”

Butterflies ran through Daryl’s stomach as he saw Ryan grinning widely. It wasn’t so rare to see Ryan in good moods, but it still brought the butterflies to Daryl. 

Without saying anything, Daryl leaned forward, and kissed Ryan on his lips. 

After breaking the kiss, Ryan looked up to see Daryl being all flustered. 

The two stared at each other for a while, both falling over and over again for each other. 

“Come.” Daryl said. “Carol got us some lunch.”

“Lunch…” Ryan muttered, and walked next to Daryl to their shared house. 

 

During the rest of the day, Ryan strolled around Alexandria, and eventually laid down in the grass near the pond on a beach towel he had found in one of the closets in the house. 

“Working on your tan?” Rick’s voice said. Ryan opened his eyes, got up on one arm, and saw the man sitting next to him in the grass. 

“Hell yeah.” Ryan said, closing one eye against the sun. “What are you up to?”

“Getting used to Alexandria.” Rick admitted, looking over the pond. 

“It’s quite the opposite of what we’ve been through, huh?” Ryan said, sitting up straight next to Rick. 

“Yeah.” Rick answered. “Everyone’s cleaned up, except for Daryl. They are making the best of this all.”

Ryan snickered. “Don’t worry, I’m going to try to get him into the shower later today.”

“That’d be great.” Rick looked at the younger guy. “Daryl really smells.”

“Especially after being clean yourself.” Ryan said. 

Deanna came into view, and walked towards the two guys. “Hello Ryan, Rick.”

“Hey,” Rick said. “Is there something wrong?”

“Actually I came here to speak to Ryan.” Deanna smiled. “About your job, Ryan. I have spoken to Denise. As long as you’re in therapy with her, you won’t have a job. But, if you’d like to help out, help is always welcome.”

“Okay.” Ryan said. “Thanks for telling.”

“No problem. Now enjoy the sun while it’s still out here.” Deanna kept smiling, and got off again. 

“Therapy?” Rick asked as soon Deanna was out of sight.

“Yeah. It should help me accept my past.” Ryan said, looking at some houses. “Also the things that happened at the hospital...”

“What happened at Grady Memorial wasn’t your fault.” Rick said.

“More has happened.” Ryan said. 

Rick wanted to know more about it, but decided not to ask. “It’s good you can talk about it.”

“I suppose.”

“You know. I remember the you from back on the road.” Rick looked into the distance. “You’ve changed so much.”

“Yeah.” Ryan said. “I trust you guys now.”

“That’s really good to hear.” Rick looked at Ryan again, with a smile. “I’ve never thanked you.”

“For what?”

“What has happened the last year. You’ve protected us. Hell, at Terminus…” 

Ryan interrupted Rick. “I’d like not to think back about Terminus.”

“Yeah… Yeah, you’re right.” Rick agreed, nodding. “But still. Thank you.”

“No problem.” Ryan’s mouth pulled into a smile as he nudged Rick softly in his side. “I’m going to seek the smelly beast and put him in the shower.”

Ryan got up, and grabbed the beach towel. “See you later, Rick.”

“Later, Ryan.” Rick watched Ryan walk off. 

It didn’t take long for Ryan to spot Daryl. He hung around the house, as usual. 

This time, he was cleaning his crossbow, while sitting on the porch’s fence, talking with Carol. 

“T ime to punch the clock and make the casseroles.” Carol said, fixing her neat clothes.

“What?” Daryl asked, not knowing what Carol was talking about, and looked up from his crossbow. He had noticed Ryan come up the porch too.

“Make dinner for the older people. Moms who need a break, people who can't cook. Get to meet a lot of the neighbors that way.” Carol smiled.

“All right.” Daryl scoffs, continuing his business with his crossbow.

“Have you taken a shower yet?” Carol asked, judging.

“Mhmm.” Daryl hummed, nodding. 

Carol squinted her eyes, noticing Daryl did not look different, and also didn’t smell different than when they had arrived at Alexandria. “Take a shower, I'm gonna wash that vest. We need to keep up appearances, even you.” Carol walked down the porch steps. Quickly, Ryan held his hand out, signing to Carol it would take five minutes to get Daryl into the shower, on which she nodded. 

“Hey, I ain't starting now.” Daryl said, still busy with his crossbow, making his statement he didn’t want to shower, nor his vest clean. He hadn’t noticed Carol and Ryan communicate.

“I'm gonna hose you down in your sleep.” Carol said, making Ryan laugh. 

“You look ridiculous.” Daryl added.

Ryan eyed Daryl, and Daryl noticed.

“What?”

“Come with me.” Ryan said, holding the door open to Daryl to go in. 

“Why?”

Ryan gave Daryl a suggestive look in the eyes, making Daryl quite excited, so he followed Ryan into the house. 

Luckily for Ryan, Daryl didn’t know the layout of the house very well yet, so he got tricked into the bathroom. 

Before Daryl could turn around and walk off, Ryan locked the two of them in, standing in the way of the door. 

“Son of a…” Daryl wanted to curse, but didn’t. “Ya tricked me.”

“Don’t act like you don’t like it.” Ryan said. “Now get out of your clothes or I’ll shower you with your clothes on. You reek.”

Taking in Ryan’s words, Daryl started to strip from his clothes, and so did Ryan. Daryl looked at Ryan as he got naked, he’d never properly seen Ryan naked before, it always was dark before, or they were too busy making love. 

“Do you need help removing your clothes, mister Dixon?” Ryan was completely naked already, but still had his prosthesis on. 

Somewhere in Ryan’s voice was a suggestive tone, but Daryl took his clothes off by himself, and dropped them onto a pile before stepping into the shower, and turning it on. 

Quickly, Ryan grabbed Daryl’s clothes, unlocked the door, and threw them into the hallway. “Carol!” He shouted.

“On it!” Carol shouted back, coming up the stairs to collect the clothing. 

Ryan quickly closed and locked the door again, being met with the gaze of an unamused Daryl.

“Lil’ shit.” Daryl said, but in his tone was a little laughter.

Ryan pulled up his shoulders, before removing his prosthesis. “I did what I had to do.”

Quickly, Ryan joined Daryl under the shower, seeking support from the wall. 

“Ya know here is a shower chair, right?” Daryl raised an eyebrow. 

“Wait, what?” Ryan asked, not having noticed the shower chair. 

Daryl got out of the shower, and got the chair. “Here.”

“You sit on it.” Ryan said, and put some shampoo in his hand. “I’ll wash your hair.”

Daryl wanted to complain, but after seeing Ryan raise an eyebrow, he got onto the chair quickly. 

Standing behind the older man, Ryan rested his left leg on the chair, next to Daryl, and gently started to wash Daryl’s hair. 

“Ew,” Ryan complained as dirt and grime came out of Daryl’s hair. 

“What?” Daryl asked, not knowing what Ryan saw, but Ryan held out a hand for him to see. The foam of the shampoo was brown-black. “Your hair is dirty, Daryl. Thank God we can shower.”

Daryl smirked as Ryan continued to massage his scalp. Daryl couldn’t remember the last time he had showered, but he already felt cleaner than he did even before the outbreak. Closing his eyes, and enjoying Ryan’s fingers on his scalp, Daryl closed his eyes. 

“Close your eyes…” Ryan muttered.

“Mhmm.” Daryl hummed, and felt the stream from the showerhead traveling over his head, washing away the shampoo.

“I’ll shampoo it again.” Ryan said, and got some shampoo in his hands again. 

Daryl didn’t complain at all, not even during the second shampoo session. 

After the second rinse, Ryan put something different into Daryl’s hair.

“What’s this?” Daryl asked.

“Conditioner.” 

“What’s that?”

Ryan chuckled. “It untangles your hair, and makes your hair softer. Leave it in for a few minutes while I soap your back.”

Daryl hummed, and soon felt a washing cloth on his back. Ryan rubbed the washing cloth across Daryl’s back in circular motions, which relaxed Daryl.

“They really don’t wash off, huh?” Ryan asked. “The tattoo’s.”

“Did ya think it’s a temporary tattoo?” Daryl answered, quite amused. “Like some sort of sticker or somethin’?”

“Thought they would fade after a while.” Ryan said honestly. 

“They do, after a long, long time.” Daryl answered. “But not completely.”

“Oh.”

When Ryan was done with the back, he wanted to wash the back of Daryl’s legs. 

“Stand up for a second.” Ryan said, and Daryl did so, but didn’t expect the washing cloth to clean his butt first. 

“Wha-?”

“Your butt needs to be clean too, Daryl.” Ryan said, moving down to wash Daryl’s legs. 

“But…” 

“No but’s, Daryl. Well, only your butt.” Ryan laughed because of his own joke. 

Daryl rolled his eyes, but allowed Ryan to clean him thoroughly, even when Ryan started to clean Daryl’s front. 

Once Daryl was clean completely, Ryan rinsed him off. The warm water would run out soon, so he did hurry a little. He would shave Daryl another time.

“All clean, mister Dixon.” Ryan smiled, turned off the water, and kissed Daryl on his lips before tossing a towel on Daryl’s head, rubbing it quickly. “Dry up.”

Ryan dried himself with the towel, and put a clean shirt and shorts on, while Daryl was still busy drying himself. 

“I’ll get some clean clothes for you. Don’t leave.” Ryan said, unlocked the door, and scavenged through the house. 

Daryl rolled his eyes. As if he was going anywhere without any clothes on.

Barely five minutes later, Ryan returned with a simple white shirt, some underwear, and sweatpants for Daryl. “Your own are being washed by Carol.”

Daryl nodded, and put on the clothing, which were a bit too big for him. “Feels strange.”

“What? The clothes or being clean?” Ryan asked. 

“Both.”

“Can’t blame you.” Ryan said, running his hand through Daryl’s wet hair. “You should wear it to the back some more...”

“Guys!” Carol shouted. “Food’s ready!”

Ryan turned around, and got down to get some food in his stomach, followed by Daryl. 

“You managed to do it, Ryan.” Rick commented, nodding towards Daryl. 

“Wait, did you shower together?” Glenn asked.

“No.” Daryl said. “He showered before me.”

“Daryl, no need to hide your relationship with Ryan.” Maggie commented. 

“What do you mean?” Daryl said in defense.

“We all saw you kiss Ryan today.” Maggie grinned, causing Ryan to turn as red as a tomato.

“Told you.” Tara said to Glenn.

“Surprises me you didn’t notice sooner.” Carl said. “They have been together for a while now.”

“But, being gay is an act of Satan.” Father Gabriel said. 

“Like ya were such a saint.” Daryl shot, reminding Gabriel of his own sins. 

“If you can’t accept them, or at least tolerate them, you’re not welcome here.” Rick said. “This isn’t a place for bigots.”

Father Gabriel didn’t say another word, and stared at his plate. 

“Good.” Rick said. “Now eat up.”

Daryl filled a plate with food for Ryan, and one for himself, before sitting together at the kitchen table. Since the two were late for dinner, the others had finished up already, and started to mind their own business. 

“What time is it?” Ryan suddenly asked, looking around the room to see if there was a clock somewhere.

“It’s around seven already.” Rick said, looking at his watch.

“I see.” Ryan said, taking his last bite from the plate. “Thank you for the food.”

He got up, and started to wash the plate and silverware he had used. Filling the sink with warm water and dish soap, Ryan started to wash the dishes. 

“Wait up.” Daryl said, quickly got up to join Ryan by doing the dishes. 

As Daryl dropped his plate and silverware into the tub, he grabbed a dishcloth.

“What are you doing?” Carol came into the picture, smiling.

“Helpin’ with the dishes.” Daryl said, and poorly dried the first plate Ryan had finished cleaning. 

Carol smiled, and took the dishcloth from Daryl. “Let me show you how.”

Ryan looked how Carol tried to teach Daryl how to dry the dishes. 

“Didn’t know there was a wrong way to dry the dishes...” Daryl said, after Carol taught him how to. 

“Well, now you can help out with the dishes.” Carol laughed, and hung the dishcloth. 

“Will think ‘bout it.” Daryl said, still feeling uncomfortable in the sweatpants and shirt Ryan had given him.

Ryan closed his eyes while smiling, shaking his head slightly. “Carol, can you help me washing something?”

“Sure, what do you want me to help you with?” Carol smiled, turning her attention to Ryan. 

Ryan walked towards a chair, and undid his prosthesis, and removed the ‘sock’ he was wearing. The sock has not been washed since somewhere in the Prison, and it needed to be washed badly again, as it started itching again a while ago. “Can you help me wash this?”

“Of course,” Carol smiled. “Follow me.”

Ryan strapped the prosthesis back on, without the sock, and followed Carol to wash the sock. 

 

“How was washin’ your sock?” Daryl asked, when Ryan returned to the bedroom he and Daryl shared. Daryl was lounging on the bed, waiting for Ryan to come back. 

“It’s clean now.” Ryan smiled, removing his prosthesis for the night. “How was your day?”

“Borin’.” Daryl said, getting closer to Ryan. “Missed ya.”

Ryan looked at Daryl, who looked back. “I’m sorry…”

Daryl smiled a bit. “Don’t worry ‘bout it.”

Nodding, Ryan got closer to Daryl, leaning against him, far away in thoughts, most of them being of Beth. 

“Whatcha thinkin’ ‘bout?” Daryl asked, noticing Ryan being deep in his thoughts. 

“Beth.” Ryan looked at Daryl again. “She would’ve liked this place.”

Daryl got quiet for a moment, thinking of her too. “Yeah… She would, huh?”

“How was she?” Ryan asked. “When she was with you.”

“At first, she was a pain in the ass.” Daryl said, honestly, but without any disrespect. “After we got drunk, I was a jerk to her, but we both got on good terms again. Talked ‘bout stuff…”

“Ah, yeah.” Ryan said, thinking back on what Beth had told him. Ryan had forgotten some parts of it, but most of it stuck to him. “The Moonshine hit you hard, huh?”

“How’d ya know we drank Moonshine?” Daryl asked, stroking Ryan’s hair.

“Beth told me,” Ryan said, still thinking back. “She told a lot, actually. Like how you carried a ladies bag around, with a lot of money in it, and how you found the coffin the best bed you’ve had in years.”

“It’s true.” Daryl said, also thinking back. “I lost ‘t when I saw more money in one bag than I’ve had in my life. Must’ve looked silly to her.” Daryl grinned. “The coffin story ‘s also true.”

Ryan smiled. “Never expected you’d walk around with a ladies purse.”

Daryl snickered. “Beth an’ me burned the house down with the money from it.”

Softly, Ryan kissed Daryl on his lips. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Daryl asked, after the kiss.

“Talking to me about Beth.” 

“Always.” Daryl replied, and kissed Ryan again. 

After just silently laying against each other, Ryan spoke. “Is this all real?”

“What’ya mean?”

“I’m afraid I’ll wake up, and it turns out all of this is a dream…” Ryan closed his eyes. “Alexandria, you…”

“It’s not a dream.” Daryl said, and pinched Ryan in his leg. “See?”

Ryan smiled. “Yeah…”

Daryl quickly pressed a kiss on top of Ryan’s head, before getting up. “Gotta piss.”

“That’s some important information.” Ryan rolled his eyes, smiling, and got under the covers. 

After Daryl was done, he joined Ryan in bed. 

“So, Ryan…” Daryl started, but didn’t get a response from Ryan. “Ryan?”

Daryl gently touched Ryan’s shoulder, only to be met with a soft snore. 

Ryan had fallen asleep, and the snore made Daryl smile for a moment, before closing his own eyes. 

 

Ryan woke up sweating in the middle of the night. Deciding he needed some water, Ryan went to the upstairs bathroom, jumping without his prosthesis.

After splashing some water into his face, Ryan looked out of the window, noticing the sky was clear, and the stars were bright, before noticing something in his eye corner. Rick was walking on the Alexandria street. Ryan shrugged it off; Rick must’ve trouble sleeping too. 

“Can’t sleep?” Ryan heard a voice behind him, Michonne’s. 

“Nightmare.” Ryan answered, turning to her. “You?”

“Rick was loud.” She answered. “Also heard you upstairs.”

“Sorry.” Ryan said. “Not wearing my prosthesis.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Michonne smiled. “Are you okay?”

“Uhuh,” Ryan nodded. “It was just a nightmare.”

Daryl suddenly rushed quietly into the bathroom. 

“You too, huh?” Michonne said. “Looks like a lot of us can’t sleep.”

“Ryan was gone,” Daryl said. “See he’s with you.”

“It’s so cute how you’re protective over him.” Michonne smiled, and walked past Daryl. “Try to get to sleep again.” 

Ryan nodded, and jumped towards Daryl, who picked him up, and walked back to bed. 

Daryl didn’t sleep right away, just like Ryan. 

“What was the nightmare about?” Daryl suddenly asked. 

Ryan, who stared into the dark, looked towards Daryl. “My childhood.”

This made Daryl quiet, taking the facial features of Ryan in, as if it was the last time he could study them. 

“It was just a nightmare.” Ryan said, shifting in bed to make himself comfortable. “It’s over now.”

“Yeah.” Daryl said, moving closer to Ryan. “Relax.”

Ryan nodded, feeling Daryl sneak an arm under his head, while tangling his legs with Ryan’s legs. 

Daryl noticed the missing piece of Ryan’s leg, but wasn’t bothered at all. Daryl shoved Ryan closer, falling asleep against him. 

Ryan felt the warm breaths of Daryl on his skin, making him fall asleep too. 

 

The next morning, at sunrise, Daryl had woken up. Quickly, without waking Ryan up, he got out of bed, and started to look for his clothes, which had been washed by Carol the day before. He found them hanging on a clothing line, and the clothing was dry. Quickly Daryl changed himself in the bathroom, feeling much more comfortable in his usual clothes than in the clothes Ryan had found in the house. He would spare those clothes as sleepwear though. 

“Mornin’,” Rick said as soon Daryl walked into the kitchen, voice down because of the others still sleeping. “Coffee?”

“We have coffee?” Daryl asked, looking at the steaming liquid the mug on the counter. 

“Jessie brought a whole basket full of stuff yesterday.” Rick said. “Even toothbrushes, toothpaste, toilet paper, toys for Judith.”

“Black.” Daryl said. 

“What do you mean?” 

“I drink my coffee black.” Daryl said, looking through some cabinets for a coffee-mug. Rick beat him to that, and poured in some. 

 

By the time Ryan had woken up, the sun was high up in the sky, shining through the window. While stretching his sleep away, Ryan noticed he hadn’t changed into night clothing last evening, so he looked through the closet in the room for spare clothing to use when Ryan would sleep. Having found an over-sized sweater, Ryan decided that would be his sleepwear, alongside with some boxers. After putting the clothing under his pillow, Ryan checked if the knife he got from Daryl was still in his dr. Martens boot, which it luckily was. For a second Ryan had feared someone had taken the knife or his bat while he was sleeping, but both were safely within Ryan’s reach; the bat rested against the nightstand next to the bed. 

Walking downstairs, Ryan got greeted by some of the group who were in the house. 

“Morning.” Ryan greeted back, and walked towards the door to go outside, only to be stopped by Carl.

“You need to eat.” Carl said. “There is more than enough.” He added the last one quickly before Ryan could use the ‘lack of supplies’ excuse he had used yesterday during lunch.

“Not hungry.” Ryan answered, but his stomach betrayed him, growling. 

“Yeah, right.” Carl grinned, and held up an apple. “At least eat this.” 

“Fine.” Ryan grabbed the apple from Carl’s hand, and took a bite. “Happy?”

“Yes, sir!” Carl grinned. 

Ryan rolled his eyes, and walked past Carl to go outside. Daryl was on the porch, doing some cleaning on his crossbow again. 

“Not clean enough?” Ryan asked.

“Nah, just bored, I guess.” Daryl answered, and got up. “How’d ya sleep?”

“Pretty good.” Ryan took another bite from the apple. “You?”

“Best sleep I’ve probably ever had.” Daryl was honest. 

“That’s good.” Ryan said, and walked off the porch. 

“Where ya goin’?” Daryl asked, walking after Ryan. 

“Looking for Denise. Therapy.”

Before the two had reached the infirmary, there was a hissy fit in front of the entrance gate. Both Daryl and Ryan stormed off to it, because they saw Glenn being pushed around by an Alexandria guy. 

“Why did you let these people in?” The guy Glenn was having a fight with spoke to Deanna, who had arrived at the scene too. 

“Because we actually know what we are doing.” Glenn had answered, causing the guy to lash out to him, but Glenn easily dodged the incoming fist, knocking the guy on the ground. 

“No!” Deanna raised her voice, but Nicolas got ready to fight too, only to be tackled onto the ground by Daryl. “That’s enough!”

Rick, who came from outside the walls, quickly ran towards Daryl, pulling him off Nicolas “Don’t do this now.” 

Daryl let Rick pull him off, but kept pacing around, keeping an eye out for Nicolas while Rick stood between the two. 

“You wanna end up on your ass again?” Ryan said to the guy who Glenn had knocked on the floor, as soon as he was on his feet again. Even though the guy was clearly taller than him, Ryan knew he would be able to knock the guy out. 

The guy looked down on Ryan, but refrained from attacking after seeing the anger in Ryan’s eyes. 

“I want everyone to hear me, okay?” Deanna spoke in a loud voice when everyone was on their feet again. “Rick and his people are part of this community now, in all ways! As equals. Understood?” Deanna glared at the guy next to her, the guy who had fought with Glenn.

“Understood…” The guy had said, defeated.

“All of you, turn in your weapons.” Deanna spoke. “And you two, come talk with me.” She pointed at Nicolas and ‘the guy’.

Daryl kept pacing restless, but by the touch of Ryan’s hand on his shoulder, he calmed down a bit. 

“I told you I have a job for you.” Deanna said to Rick. “I’d like you to be our  constable. That’s what you were, that’s what you are. And you too.” Deanna turned to Michonne. “Will you accept?”

Rick looked at the ground for a second, thinking of his answer. “Okay.”

“Yeah, I’m in.” Michonne agreed too. 

Daryl huffed, and walked away. 

“Thank you.” Deanna said, this time to Glenn, who looked around awkwardly.

“For what?”

“Knocking him on his ass.” 

Ryan smirked, and walked away, towards the infirmary for his therapy.

 

The sun had set, creating a dark atmosphere in the house where everyone was staying. Having enough light from the hanging lamp in the kitchen, Ryan was reading a book next to Eugene, who had his nose in one as well, while Carl and Noah played some poker on the dinner table while Michonne watched the two.

Tara laid on a blanket on the floor, reading a comic book, while others were just lounging on the couch or some pillows on the floor. Daryl was outside, smoking. 

Rick was upstairs, changing. When he came down, all eyes in the livingroom and kitchen were on him; Rick was wearing an uniform which was assigned to him for being a constable. He looked around the room, before walking towards Daryl, outside. 

Ryan quickly followed him, wanting to make sure Daryl didn’t get angry about the whole ‘cop’ thing. 

“We good?” Rick asked Daryl. 

“Yeah…” Daryl said, putting a piece of meat into his mouth. “You a cop again?”

“I’m trying it on for the size.” Rick said, looking down onto his outfit. 

Ryan stayed in the door opening, observing the two. Carol also joined the two.

“So we’re staying?” She asked. 

“I think we can start sleeping in our own homes. Settle in.” Rick said.

“If we’re comfortable here, we let our guard down.” Carol said. “The place is going to make us weak.”

“Carl said that.” Rick said. “But it’s not gonna happen. We won’t get weak, that’s not in us anymore. We’ll make it work. If they can’t make it, we’ll just take this place.” 

 

“How was therapy?” Daryl asked, when Ryan and him had settled back into their bedroom.

The group had split into the two given houses, making it more comfortable for everyone. Daryl and Ryan kept ‘their’ bedroom.

Daryl had noticed Ryan coming back from ‘therapy’ this afternoon, with red, puffy eyes, but when others asked about it, Ryan ignored them. 

“Hard.” Ryan said, looking up from the book he was reading. 

Daryl nodded, picking his nails. “Ain’t gonna be easy.”

“I know.” Ryan continued reading again. “I’ll be going back after a few days.” 

“How can ya read all that?” Daryl asked after a silence, grabbing the book from Ryan, and flipped some pages. “There ain’t any pictures.”

“Hey!” Ryan had almost shouted when Daryl had taken the book. “A book usually has words and letters in them, Dixon.”

“Borin’...” Daryl passed the book back to Ryan, who flipped the pages back to where he was. 

Ryan rolled his eyes. “It’s actually quite interesting.”

Daryl observed how Ryan read, and it reminded him of the book he had taken with him when he and Carol were in the temporary housing, looking for Beth. ‘Treating Survivors of Childhood Abuse.’ was the book called, as Daryl remembered it. He had wanting to read it to know more about the behaviour Ryan had, and still was showing, but he had lost it. 

“What is it about?” Daryl asked, to ease his mind of the lost book. 

“It’s a fairytale about a girl, Sorcha…” Ryan couldn’t finish his sentence, because Daryin interrupted him. 

“Aren’t ya a little old for fairytales?” 

“It’s an adult fairytale, Daryl.” Ryan sighed. “Otherwise it would have pictures, wouldn’t it?”

“Right…”

“Her father is bewitched by an evil witch, and her brothers were bewitched into swans.” Ryan said. “Only Sorcha is able to break the spell, but she has to stay silent and make shirts of starwort. If she speaks before completing the quest set to her by the Fair Folk and their queen, she will lose her brothers forever.”

“You’re readin’ that off the back of the book, aren’t ya?” Daryl grinned. 

“Yeah.” Ryan admitted. “I’m not far into the book yet. I just found it today.”

“Have fun readin’.” Daryl said, shifting under the blankets. “Imma sleep.”

“Good night, Daryl.” Ryan said. 

“Night.” 

 

Daryl woke up when the sun came up, as usual. He sat up, and noticed Ryan sleeping, with an open book on his chest. Deciding to read the page where Ryan left off, Daryl picked up the book, and started reading. 

“Thought you were too old for fairytales,” Ryan spoke with a grin, woken up when Daryl had picked the book up from his chest. “And it was boring because it didn’t have pictures.”

“Was curious.” Daryl said honestly, and continued reading about the girl who just had saved a blond British guy.

Ryan rolled his eyes, and stretched. “Slept well?”

“Yeah.” Daryl answered, not looking up from the book. 

Quickly, Ryan grabbed the book out of Daryl’s hand, and put it on the night stand. 

“Hey, I was readin’ that.” Daryl said. 

Ryan pressed a kiss to Daryl’s lips. “Daryl Dixon reading a fairytale.”

This time Daryl rolled his eyes, and got out of bed. “Got stuff to do.”

“Go shower!” Ryan said after Daryl, only to be met with a middle finger.

Ryan got up, put on his prosthesis, changed and got downstairs. 

“Morning, Ryan.” Rick greeted Ryan before leaving the place in his uniform. 

“Morning.” Ryan replied, walking to the kitchen to look if there was some food. 

“Coffee is still warm,” Rick said. “Powdered milk and sugar are in the left cabinet.”

“Thanks.” Ryan opened some cabinets to grab a mug, and opened the cabinet where the powdered milk and sugar were. Adding two scoops of sugar and pouring in some powdered milk, Ryan walked over to the coffee pot, and filled the mug with coffee, which turned from black to a nice light brown color. Of course, it was way too sweet after having a scarce of sweet supplies, but it was good. 

Rick had left, and Daryl was nowhere to be seen, so Ryan sat down at the dinner table, to be joined by Carl and Judith. 

“Hey kid,” Ryan greeted Carl, and was wary of the baby on his lap. 

“How are you doing?” Carl asked. 

“Good.” Ryan said, taking a sip from his coffee. “You?”

“Yeah, me too.” Carl said. “Are you coming to the welcoming party tonight?”

“Welcoming party?” 

“Deanna throws a party for us.” Carl explained. “You should come.”

“I’ll think about it.”

The two of them sat in silence. Everyone was minding their own business, until Judith began to cry. Glenn was on his guard from the other side of the room, ready to get up, while Abraham and Eugene watched him with questions in their eyes.

“Sorry, Carl.” Ryan said, and got up, walking out the house.

Having taken his cup of coffee with him, Ryan walked around Alexandria, repeating some of the town’s people’s names in his head, and connecting them to the house. 

“Hey, Ryan.” A familiar voice said. 

Turning his head to the sound, Ryan saw Eric sitting on the porch of his home. 

“Eric.” Ryan said, while walking up the stairs to the porch. 

“How are you doing?” Eric asked with a smile, while standing up with the help of his crutches. 

“Good, I guess.” Ryan said, taking another sip of his cooled down coffee. “You?”

“Besides my foot, I’m doing fine. Wanna come in?” 

“Sure.” Ryan said, and followed Eric to inside.

“Welcome to Aaron’s and my home.” Eric smiled.

Looking around, Ryan noticed a lot of licence plates hanging on the walls, and other antique signs. The wooden-glass cabinet on the opposite side of the door contained antique stuff, and the salon table had an antique lamp on it. 

“Love antique’s, huh?” Ryan questioned while looking around. The livingroom was full with it. 

“Yeah.” Eric laughed. “Aaron collects licence plates, while I just like antique’s on its own. You want a refill of coffee?”

“Please.” Ryan said, and hummed what he wanted in his coffee. While Eric refilled the mug, Ryan walked into the office next to the livingroom, where even more licence plates were hanging. 

“Aaron tries to collect all states.” Eric said from the kitchen, knowing Ryan was staring at the wall with licence plates. 

Ryan returned to Eric, who sat at the dinner table, having set the mug on it. 

“How did you break it?” Ryan asked, and sat down on a chair too. “Your foot.”

“On the scouting trip I had to hide under a car from some Walkers.” Eric said. “They ended up rolling a car tire onto my ankle, breaking it.”

“That’s why you shot the flare?”

“Yeah.”

“Will it heal?”

Eric laughed. “Of course. Pete is a good doc.”

“Good.” Ryan said. 

“Will your leg heal?” Eric said, almost causing Ryan to spit out his coffee.

“My leg?” Ryan asked. 

“Yeah, your left leg is wounded too, right? You should go to Pete.”

“My leg is fine.” Ryan said, rolling up his pant leg, to show the prosthesis to Eric.

“Oh.” Eric was speechless for a moment. “I didn’t know that. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Ryan said, sipping from his coffee. 

“How did you lose it?” Eric asked.

“Infection.” Ryan answered. “A while before the outbreak.”

Eric nodded understandingly. 

“Are you coming to the party tonight?” Ryan asked before drinking his coffee again. 

“No, I’ll stay home because of my foot.”

“Hmm,” Ryan hummed, finishing his coffee. 

 

After a while of talking to Eric, Ryan left to return the mug to the home, and prepared himself for the party. He had decided to go, not wanting to disappoint Carl.

“Ryan, are you coming?” Carl had asked, being all ready for the party. 

“Yeah, one sec.” Ryan answered, applying some deodorant on him.

Together with Carol, Rick, who was carrying Judith and Carl, Ryan left the home and headed to Deanna’s home. Carol had made some cookies, and brought those with her. 

“Oh my.” Deanna said smiling, walking towards the newly arrived guests. “Welcome.”

“Hi.” Carol smiled, way too overdone.

“It’s good to see you. Hi Carl.” Deanna walked over to the adults. “Thank you for coming. You know, I didn’t get the chance to interview this one.” Deanna tickled Judith, who Rick still held. “I envy her.”

“Why?” Rick asked, but Deanna kept staring at Judith. 

“Because she gets to see what this place will become.” Deanna looked around again. “Come, come on in.”

She lead them into her home, but Ryan got distracted by the door opening again. Ryan looked back, noticing Abraham and Rosita entering the house, looking all fancy, and Rosita even wore big earrings. 

“I don’t know about this.” Was the first thing Abraham said to both Rosita and Ryan, as Rosita had joined Ryan. 

Rosita shook her head. “They have beer?” This caused Abraham to nod.

“Yeah, I’m gonna try.” He said, and walked over to the beer. 

Ryan felt out of place here, but stayed to see what would happen. 

Slowly, some more familiar faces arrived, Noah, Tara, and after a while Glenn and Maggie arrived. 

“Hey,” Both Glenn and Maggie greeted Ryan, who hadn’t moved a lot while he had arrived here. 

“Hey.” Ryan muttered back.

“You okay?” Glenn asked, being worried about Ryan. 

“This is just not my thing.” Ryan answered. “I’ll be going now.”

“No no, you’re not bailing.” Glenn smiled. “We’re doing this together.”

“You’re with us.” Maggie said. “Remember, you’re family.”

“Come on.” Glenn said, and took Ryan to the table with beers. “Have a beer with me.”

Handing over a beer Glenn smiled, and Ryan accepted. Toasting with Glenn, Ryan smiled. 

 

Outside, Daryl observed the festive activity, but didn’t want to go in. He saw Ryan and Glenn toasting, which made him happy, but still walked off. 

Since it was already dark, nobody had seen him, until the lights of Aaron’s and Eric’s house turned on, and Aaron stepped outside. “Daryl, hey.” 

“Aren’t ya goin’ to that party over there?” Daryl asked, pointing at the Monroe’s house. 

“Oh, no. I was never going to go because of Eric’s ankle. Thank God.” Aaron spoke, he didn’t want to go there. 

“Why the hell did you tell me to go there, then?”

“I said try. You did.  It's a thought that counts thing. ”

“All right…” Daryl started to walk away.

“Hey,” Aaron said to stop him. “Come in, have some dinner.”

Daryl didn’t move, thinking of what he would do. 

“Come on, man. It’s some pretty serious spaghetti.” Aaron smiled, and headed back in. 

 

Back at the party, Ryan had downed his beer with Glenn, and had been handed another one. Due to the lack of alcohol in Ryan’s life, his alcohol tolerance was lower than expected. After he had downed his second beer, Jessie had handed him a glass with strong liquor.

Since it was a little bit in a big glass, Ryan assumed it should be drank in once, so he did. He started to feel tipsy, and happier than normal, giggling about small things, and his cheeks had turned red. 

“Well, Carl. That’s why you aren’t allowed to drink alcohol yet.” Maggie spoke, while laughing because of drunk Ryan. Carl laughed too, never having seen Ryan so happy.

Rick had seen Ryan talk drunk gibberish to Carl, causing him to smile and softly shake his head. He was clearly amused, but was wondering how Ryan would feel in the morning. 

“Hey Jessie.” Ryan said loud and giggly, swaying to her. “You got more of the good stuff?”

“I think you have enough alcohol in your system, Ryan.” Rick said, and put an arm around Ryan to lead him away. For once, Ryan didn’t flinch at the touch. 

“Rick, you party-pooper…” Ryan pouted, causing Rick to laugh. 

“Let’s go get some air, clear your mind.”

“I wanna go to Daryl, Rick, can we go to Daryl?” Ryan suddenly asked, half falling down the steps of the porch. 

“Yeah, you can go find Daryl.” Rick grinned. “I’ll stay here though.”

He knew Daryl was near.

“Okay.” Ryan sang, and walked in the direction to their houses. 

Rick watched him go, and continued to watch him.

“Daryl!” Ryan suddenly shouted. “Daryl!”

It was strange seeing Ryan like this, but it was amusing to Rick. 

 

At the dinner table with Eric and Aaron, Daryl shoveled the spaghetti in his mouth as if it were the last proper food he would eat. Daryl even drank the wine the couple had provided for him. 

Both Aaron and Eric exchanged looks, chuckling softly at how Daryl ate. They were used to eat properly, and they always had enough to eat. 

“Y’know,” Daryl wanted to ask the couple something, something  _ embarrassing _ , and didn’t know where to start. “You two are a couple, right?”

“We are.” Aaron said, holding Eric’s hand. 

“Yeah.” Daryl said, picking his fingers awkwardly. “I’ve been meaning to ask you guys something…”

“Ask us then.” Eric said, smiling kindly.

“You guys do the… well you know… frick frack, right?” Daryl felt himself turn red. 

“Well, yes.” Eric laughed, but also turned red. “That’s part of our relationship.”

“Y’know, well, how does that work?” Daryl asked, not wanting to look at any of the guys and turned even redder. 

Aaron and Eric looked at each other for a brief second. 

“It works the same as hetero sex.” Eric broke the ice. “Only with male’s.”

“I got that…” Daryl admitted. “I asked the wrong question, I guess.”

“Take your time, Daryl.” Aaron smiled. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed of.”

“Ryan and I are in a relationship.” Daryl blurted out. “We’ve done  _ it _ before… But it was my first time with a guy, so...”

“You’re asking if you guys did it properly right?” Eric spoke up.

“Yeah.” Daryl said. “It’d hurt for Ryan, I think…”

“So he was the bottom?”

“The what?”

“The bottom is the one who receives the thrusting.” Aaron explained.

“Yeah, he’s the bottom.”

“Did you use lube?” Eric asked. 

“No.” Daryl asked honestly, feeling more at ease with the couple since they took him seriously. “We don’t have any.”

“Lube allows the penis to enter the anus without pulling or tearing of the anal tissue.” Eric continued to speak. “It would be less painful for Ryan if you use lube.”

“I’ll get you some.” Aaron spoke, and got up.

Eric continue to explain to Daryl. “Stretching him up would help too against the pain.”

“Stretching?”

“Well, first you insert a lubed up finger, maybe two, and slowly work up those digits. You can spread your fingers to stretch him a little more too.”

Daryl nodded, taking mental notes. 

When Aaron got back, he had a bottle and some condoms with him. “Here.” He handed the stuff to Daryl.

“Thanks, I guess.” Daryl accepted the bottle and condoms, and inspected the bottle. The bottle contained a clear substance. “So this is lube?”

“Yes.” Aaron answered. “Water-based lube.”

“Don’t you guys need it?” Daryl looked at the guys.

“We have another bottle of it.” Eric smiled. 

Daryl pulled up the corner of his mouth, and smiled at the two. “Thanks.”

“Now, eat some more.” Aaron smiled. 

 

After eating a bit more, Aaron had announced to Daryl he’d like Daryl to be his scouting partner. Daryl knows what he is doing, and knows the difference between good and bad people, had been Aaron’s motive. Aaron also showed Daryl the motorcycle in the garage, and the spare parts of it. 

The two of them were talking about all the bikeparts, when they heard someone screaming for Daryl.

Knowing the voice, Daryl stormed outside to see Ryan swaying over the road. “Daryl?”

“Ryan!” Daryl sprinted to the swaying guy. “Ryan, ‘re you okay?”

“Daryl!” Ryan happily said, and hugged him, before looking up to him again. “I missed you so much!”

Leaning forward, Daryl inhaled Ryan’s scent, and smelled alcohol coming from his breath. “You’re drunk?”

Ryan giggled. “Hell yeah I am.”

“Ryan…”

Aaron looked from the distance. “You need help?”

“Nah I got it.” Daryl shouted back. 

“Okay, see you later, Daryl.” Aaron smiled, and got back in.

“I know something!” Ryan said happily, when Daryl took him towards their home. “Let’s make a baby!”

Daryl almost choked when hearing that. “What?”

“You heard me, silly.” Ryan giggled. “Let’s make a baby.”

“Ryan, we’re both guys.” Daryl rolled his eyes, and helped Ryan up the porch before leading him into the house, up the stairs. 

“Oh, yeah.” Ryan had answered, and giggled. “I forgot.”

“Noticed.” Daryl said, grinning. “Now, let’s get you in bed.”

“Yay!” Ryan said, grabbing Daryl’s belt. 

“No sex!” Daryl said, and pushed Ryan’s hands away. Even though Ryan was the one asking for it, Daryl didn’t want to take advantage of Ryan. 

Ryan pouted, but didn’t go any further. 

Daryl undressed Ryan, and put him into his night wear. 

“What’s this?” Ryan sat on the bed and raised his left leg. “I’m a robot!”

Not believing this was Ryan like when drunk, Daryl got the prosthesis off, and put Ryan in bed. “Sleep.”

Daryl also stripped, after putting the condoms and lube in his nightstand drawer. He changed into his own night wear, and joined Ryan in the bed.


	11. Trouble in Paradise

Daryl got woken up by some groaning. Being alarmed, Daryl shot up, thinking there was a Walker near, but in reality it was just Ryan groaning on the side of the bed.  
“What happened yesterday?” Ryan groaned, and put on his prosthesis.  
“Ya really wanna know?” Daryl asked, quite amused by the hungover Ryan.  
“Something tells me I’ve made a complete idiot of myself.” Ryan groaned, and threw himself in the bed again, with prosthesis.  
“How’d ya guess it.” Daryl towered over Ryan, and softly kissed him on the mouth. The taste of alcohol still hung in his mouth.  
“Uuugh.” Ryan groaned. “What did I do?”  
“Ya got extremely happy while being drunk.” Daryl huffed out a laugh. “Shoutin’ my name all over the street, and once you saw me, hugged me, claimin’ you had missed me ‘so much’.” Daryl imitated how Ryan had been last night. “Ya also said ya wanted to make a baby.”  
“Oh dear God,” Ryan hid his face behind his hands, being very embarrassed. “Someone please kill me.”  
“Nah, we’ll just keep the alcohol away.” Daryl grinned. “Gotta go.”  
Daryl got up out of bed, and started changing into his clothes, with a warm and thick flannel added before he wore his leather jacket over it.  
Ryan opened an eye, and watched Daryl change. “Where are you going?”  
“Imma go scout with Aaron.” Daryl spoke before putting his shoes on.  
“Okay.” Ryan said, clearly disappointed. “I was hoping to shower with you…”  
“Another time.” Daryl kissed Ryan on the forehead, and left.  
Ryan got up, and put on his prosthesis. He didn’t bother to change into his clothes, and walked down the stairs in his sleepwear.  
“Morning…” Ryan muttered as he saw Carl and Michonne having breakfast at the dinner table, and Rick feeding Judith.  
“Ryan, good morning!” Carl said happily, and Michonne smiled and nodded as her greeting. Rick also told Ryan ‘good morning’ and continued feeding Judith.  
Ryan walked out of the house, just in time to see Daryl driving down the way to the gate on a motorcycle. Ryan quickly waved to Daryl, who waved back, and continued to drive towards the gate, Aaron on his heels.  
  
It was pretty quiet around Alexandria, Abraham was at the working site where Reg got the parts of the wall, to collect more parts to extend it, Glenn, Tara, Noah, and Eugene went on a run with Nicolas and Aiden, the one Glenn had knocked on the ground before. The power was down this morning, and Reg had complained about it. And of course Daryl and Aaron were gone. Rick was on his ‘cop’ duty, and Carl was probably strolling again with Judith.  
Downstairs, Carol was making something in the kitchen, while Ryan was in the shower. He sat on the shower chair, and cleaned himself. The shower felt empty without Daryl in it, which made Ryan sad. The warm water made the hungover Ryan feel better, but he still regretted drinking so much at the party.  
The day got worse when Glenn and Eugene came back from the run, Eugene carrying Tara to the infirmary. Deciding not to ask about it, Ryan quietly sat on the couch with Carl, staring at the wall on the other side.  
Someone knocked on the door, and Carl decided to open it.  
“Hey,” Eric’s voice sounded. “Is Ryan here?”  
“Yeah, he is.” Carl said, while Ryan got up.  
“Hey Eric.” Ryan said. “What’s wrong?”  
“I was wondering if you’d like to come over?” Eric blurted out. “It’s lonely without Aaron.”  
“Yeah, sure.” Ryan said, after looking at Carl, who gave him a nodd.  
Following Eric back to his house, Ryan looked around. It was still quieter than normal.  
“Eric!” Pete’s voice rang through the air, and walked towards Eric. “How is your ankle?”  
“It’s fine, thank you Pete.” Eric answered.  
“Good.” Pete almost slurred, and Ryan got a very unpleasant feeling from him.  
“Hey boy,” Pete started talking to Ryan, causing him to shiver and bite his lip. “Saw you limping. I can help you.”  
“No.” Ryan said.  
“I’m a doctor.” Pete argued. “Here, let me help you.”  
Pete reached his hand out to put around Ryan’s shoulder, before being stopped by an unseen force, causing Pete to freeze in his motion.  
“Keep walking.” Rick said in a cold voice.  
“Hey! Rick!” Pete got distracted, and walked towards Rick.  
Ryan quickly looked back to see Rick looking at him, and quickly nodded. Returning the nod as a thank you, Ryan followed Eric into his house.  
“He creeps me out.” Ryan said once inside.  
“Why?” Eric asked. “He’s a nice guy.”  
“No.”  
This confused Eric, while he sat on a chair at the table. “Why not?”  
“He has that look in his eyes.”  
“What look?”  
“He’s not who people think he is.” Ryan said.  
Eric looked at Ryan while he sat down too, after grabbing two glasses with water.  
“Why do you think that?” Eric asked, accepting the glass with water.  
“I just know.” Ryan took a sip from the water.  
  
The evening passed quickly at Eric’s home, so late at night, Ryan decided to return back to his house.  
“Hey, Ryan.” Eric said before shutting the door after seeing Ryan out. “They’ll be okay. Daryl and Aaron.”  
“I know.” Ryan said, walking off the porch. “Thanks for tonight.”  
Eric smiled, and closed the door after Ryan had left the house.  
Soon, Ryan walked next to Rick, who had been patrolling the area. “Hey.”  
“Hey,” Rick replied. “You okay?”  
“Yeah.” Ryan replied, looking in front of him. “Pete scares me.”  
“I know.” Rick said. “Sam, Jessie’s and his son, once found Jessie on the ground, bleeding. Sam even asked Carol for a gun, probably to protect his mother.”  
Ryan didn’t really reply to that, and walked up the porch.  
“Are you worried?” Rick asked. “About Daryl?”  
“No.” Ryan spoke, and walked into the house, straight to his bedroom. Rick decided on letting Ryan be, and didn’t follow him.  
Sighing, Ryan sat down on his bed, and removed his prosthesis. His thoughts went full speed, thinking about everything that had happened since he had joined this group.  
Laying down, his thoughts came across Hershel’s farm, now overrun by Walkers.  
He had been weak, so weak. Having escaped his former group, Ryan had been extremely nervous to approach the house which seemed unaffected by the whole ‘end of the world’ thing. If Daryl hadn’t opened that door, Ryan would have died, and have turned. Sighing, Ryan was happy that didn’t happen.  
He didn’t trust anyone at all, at that time. And even though Ryan didn’t see a lot of the farm, he quite missed it.  
Sighing, Ryan removed his clothing, while thinking about the time on the road. It had been about 8 months before they had found the prison, and Lori had driven Ryan crazy. She never knew where Carl was, and kept nagging.  
Daryl, Carl and Hershel had managed to gain some of Ryan’s trust over the time. Daryl had carried Ryan on his back for a while, since Ryan wasn’t in any condition to walk by himself.  
Ryan softly smirked at that thought. At the time he didn’t like it at all, but if he could do it now, he would happily jump on Daryl’s back.  
When Ryan had jumped into his night clothing, his thoughts drifted over to the fights he’d have with Daryl, about the piggyback riding.  
  
“I can walk!” Ryan raised his voice, refusing to touch Daryl for the piggyback ride.  
“Don’t be ‘n brat!” Daryl had shouted back, throwing his hands up in the air and pacing around. “Ya can’t walk long distances yet!”  
“Hmpf!” Ryan huffed, refusing to look at Daryl. He was done speaking to him.  
“Ya can jump on, or Imma get Rick or somethin’!” Daryl had shouted once again.  
  
Daryl had won that argument. Ryan had ended up at his back, with the help of Rick, Glenn and T-Dog. When Rick had heard Daryl shouting at Ryan, he had jumped in, only to receive a nice bruise on his chin from Ryan. Rick and T-Dog had grabbed Ryan’s arms a that time, and Glenn helped picking Ryan up to place him on Daryl’s back. Ryan had received a lecture from Hershel, that he should rest, and not throw a fit like this. At that time, Ryan had rolled his eyes, but when thinking back right now, he wished he had listened more to Hershel.  
Rolling over to touch Daryl’s side of the bed, Ryan closed his eyes. He wished Daryl didn’t have to go.  
Ryan got pulled out of his thoughts when he heard someone knock on his door. Not reacting to the knocking, he did hear the door open, and someone stepping in.  
“Hey,” A familiar voice said. It was Carl’s. “Can I come in?”  
“You’re in already.” Ryan said, and got up. “What’s wrong?”  
“Can I talk to you for a second?” Carl asked, sitting on the edge of the bed, near Ryan.  
Ryan, who scooted a bit further from Carl, nodded. “Yeah. What’s up?”  
“I miss my mom.” Carl spilled, looking at his feet. “This house reminds me of her.”  
Listening closely, Ryan took in the words Carl spoke. “You know she isn’t suffering anymore right?” He said, carefully, not wanting to make the boy upset.  
“I know, but it still hurts.” He sighed. “She always wanted to live in this kind of houses. Making pancakes every Sunday morning, even though they were terrible.” Carl snickered for a second. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be talking about this topic to you.” Carl said, remembering Ryan’s story.  
“Don’t worry about it.” Ryan quickly said. “Everyone needs someone to talk to about heavy topics.”  
“Yeah, but you went through so much.” Carl argued, but Ryan shook his head.  
“That doesn’t matter. I’m here for you, okay?” Ryan smiled, even though he didn’t feel like smiling.  
Carl smiled back and nodded. “Thank you, bro!”  
“Any time.” Ryan nodded. “So, what have you been up to lately?”  
“Getting to know Alexandria, strolling with Judy. The casual.” Carl pulled up his shoulder. “What about you?”  
Ryan thought for a second. “Yeah, same. Except for the strolling with Judith part.”  
“You seemed to have enjoyed the welcome-party though.” Carl grinned. “You were drunk.”  
“No I wasn’t.” Ryan tried to deny the fact he was drunk. “I was slightly tipsy.”  
“Yeah, that’s why you wanted to make a baby with Daryl.” Carl gave Ryan a cheeky grin.  
“Oh Lord.” Ryan sighed, and couldn’t help but to grin too. “That was supposed to be discreet.”  
Carl laughed. “Well, most of us heard it.” He got up, and stretched. “Thank you for the talk, Ryan.”  
Nodding, Ryan stretched out too, and got under the covers. “Sleep well, Carl.”  
“You too!” Carl said, and got out, and shut the door.  
  
The next day, Ryan woke up, feeling pretty much rested, and stretched out. The spot next to him was still empty, Daryl still being away to recruit new people. Sighing, Ryan swung his legs over the edge of the bed, stood up, and jumped towards the bathroom, wanting to take a shower again. Taking longer than usual, Ryan softly smiled, feeling pretty relaxed, and enjoyed the warm water on his skin. Making sure he didn’t use up all the warm water, Ryan got out of the shower after a while, drying and dressing himself slowly. Combing his hair back, Ryan got out of the shower, and jumped back to Daryl and his bedroom to put on his prosthesis. Having a soft smile, and his mind nowhere in particular, Ryan suddenly heard a loud crash, jumped up, and ran outside.  
Rick and Pete had crashed through the front window of Pete and Jessie’s house, and now were brawling on the ground in front of it.  
With Pete on the ground, and Rick on top of him, Pete hooked Rick in the face, resulting in Rick hitting him back. Nicolas and Glenn came running, as well as Carl, Enid, and Carol. Jessie and Pete’s son Sam hid behind Carol, as the rest of the community circled around the fighting men.  
Pete ended up on top of Rick, resulting in Jessie trying to get Pete off, but got hit in her face by a rage-ridden Pete, who continued to choke Rick.  
Somehow, Rick managed to headbud Pete, regaining his position on top again.  
“Dad! Get off!” Carl tried to get Rick off Pete, but got shoved away too. Ryan quickly ran to Carl, helping Carl get up, and dragged him to a safer spot.  
“Be careful next time.” Ryan said, not taking his eyes off the fighting duo.  
Rick successfully got Pete in a choking position, on which Pete hadn’t much power. He seemed to doze off, but got pulled back into reality when Deanna ordered the two to stop.  
“Stop it. Right now.” Deanna said, having arrived at the scene.  
“You touch them again and I'll kill you.” Rick threatened Pete.  
“Damnit Rick! I said stop!” Deanna snapped when Rick spoke to Pete. Deanna was pissed off, which was visible in her whole posture. Tobin, Glenn and Nicolas tried to go in, but the moment they moved, Rick pulled out a gun.  
“Or what?” Rick pointed the gun at them, who froze right in their tracks next to Deanna. “You gonna kick me out?!” Rick sounded like an absolute madman.  
Wanting to jump in, Ryan decided against it, keeping Carl safely behind him.  
“Put that gun down, Rick.” Deanna had her hands defensively in front of her, while the bystanders next to her moved nervously. Rick was bloodied and hysterical, so their fear was natural.  
Panting, Rick sat on his knees, lightly swinging the guy as he moved in disbelief. “You still don’t get it?!” He dropped his arm as he looked at Deanna, the disbelief clearly on his face. “None of you do!” Rick snapped, pointing at some of the other residents circled around them.  
“We know what needs to be done, and we do it!” Rick continued speaking, still hysterical. “We’re the ones who live… You! You just sit and plan and hesitate! You pretend like you know when you don't.” Out of the walls, you could faintly hear the silenced shots Sasha made to snipe Walkers down, as Rick spoke. “You wish things weren't what they are. Well, you want to live? You want this place to stay standing? Your way of doing things is done. Things don't get better because you - You want them to. Starting right now, we have to live in the real world. We have to control who lives here.”  
“That’s never been more clear to me than it is right now.” Deanna said sternly, not breaking eye contact with Rick.  
Ryan knew what she meant, and so did Rick.  
“Me? Me? You…” Rick held his hands up to himself, while softly laughing mockingly. “You mean - You mean me? Your way is gonna destroy this place. It's gonna get people killed. It's already gotten people killed. I'm not gonna stand by and just let it happen. If you don't fight, you die. I'm not gonna stand by and…”  
Without Rick noticing, Michonne had sprinted at him, and knocked him out, to Ryan’s relief. Quickly Michonne took Rick’s revolver, and glanced over the bystanders. The fight was over.  
  
Deanna had organized a meeting, after the incident with Rick and Pete. So the next day, when it got dark, Deanna had lit a bonfire, in the middle of the town, and residents who wanted to talk about the situation were welcome to come. Also Ryan had joined, along with Maggie, Carol, Abraham, and Eugene.  
Deanna her patience started to run out, and wanted to start without Rick, who had said to be there. Sitting next to Eric, who had his head down, Ryan listened to Deanna’s opening speech.  
People started to talk about Rick, and who he is. Michonne starting, Carol second, who put her ‘sweet, harmless woman’ act up again, and third, Abraham, who had the finest way to speak to the listening people.  
“Simply put, there's a vast ocean of shit you people don't know shit about. Rick knows every fine grain of said shit... and then some.” He said, standing against a small wall, looking at the people who listened to him. A little later, Maggie started telling her story.  
“My father respected Rick Grimes.” She started, causing Ryan to focus his attention to her story. “Rick is a father too. He’s a man with a good heart, he feels the things he does, the things he has to do. And all of us, who were together before this place, no matter where we found each other, we’re family now.”  
Ryan couldn’t help but feel touched by her words. He felt the same; he thought of ‘their group’ as family too.  
“Rick started that,” Maggie continued. “And you won’t stop that. You can’t” She looked at Deanna, and shook her head with the last two words. “And you don’t want to. This community, you people… That family… You want to be a part of that too.” Maggie finished her speech, and slightly nodded.  
Deanna stepped forward. “Before we hear from anyone else.” She spoke. “I, ehm, I would like to share something in the spirit of transparency.” Deanna had folded her hands together, and took a small pause before continuing. “Father Gabriel came to see me the day before yesterday, and he said our new arrivals can’t be trusted.” Deanna looked around. “That they are dangerous. That they’d put themselves before this community. And not one day later Rick seemed to demonstrate all the things Father Gabriel said. I had hoped Father Gabriel would be here tonight.” Deanna stepped back.  
“I don’t see him here, Deanna.” Ryan suddenly said. “So you’re just saying what someone said.”  
“Did you tape him?” Jessie suddenly asked.  
“He’s not here.” Maggie said, but Deanna quickly replied.  
“Neither is Rick.” Deanna looked at Maggie with quite fierce eyes.  
“Excuse me…” Maggie said, and left before anyone could stop her.  
After a while of silence, Tobin stood up to say something, but once he opened his mouth, Rick came in, with a body over his shoulder. A Walkers body.  
Everyone looked quite shocked at the, yet again, bloodied Rick.  
Rick stepped forward, and dropped the corpse right next to the bonfire, causing Deanna to startle, and place her hand over her mouth.  
Ryan just looked at the corpse, and looked back up at Rick, curious what he would have to say.  
“There wasn’t a guard at the gate!” Rick spat. “It was open.”  
Deanna ordered Spencer to go to the gate to guard it, before Rick continued.  
“I didn’t bring it in! It got inside on it’s own!” Rick started walking around. “They always will, the dead and the living. Because we are in here! And the ones out there… They’ll hunt us. They’ll find us. They’ll try to use us. They’ll try to kill us. But we'll kill them. We'll survive. I'll show you how.” Rick took a short break. “You know, I was thinking, how many of you do I have to kill to save your lives? But I'm not going to do that. You're going to change.”  
During the rest of the speech, Ryan got up, just like everyone else. He looked at Rick who talked, but behind him, Jessie started to shake her head, to someone nobody saw coming.  
“You’re not one of us! You’re not one of us!” A drunken Pete stood in the entrance of the place where they were gathered, holding Michonne her sword.  
“Pete, you don’t wanna do this!” Reg stood in front of Pete, wanting to stop him.  
Pete on the other hand, didn’t listen, so Reg tried to physically stop Pete, resulting in Pete shoving Reg away, accidentally slicing open Reg’s neck, to everyone’s surprise. Even Ryan was surprised, and wanted to jump in, but Abraham was quicker; he tackled Pete down.  
Deanna had taken her dying husband in her arms, and screamed until he bled out.  
“Rick.” She said, and looked up at him. “Do it.”  
Without any hesitation, Rick turned around, and a gunshot was heard. Rick had put a bullet through Pete’s skull, executing him successfully.  
“Rick?” Another voice suddenly said, revealing Aaron and Daryl in the opening, together with another man.  
  
After the gathering, and the execution, Ryan and Daryl were reunited again. “Daryl…” Ryan breathed, and snaked his arms around Daryl, as they were in their bedroom. “I’m glad you’re back.” He said softly.  
Despite Daryl being filthy all over, Ryan couldn’t help but rub his face into Daryl’s chest.  
Realizing Daryl must be hungry, Ryan took him back to the shared house, and set him at the kitchen table, giving Daryl, and Morgan who tagged along, a bowl of food. “There you go…” Ryan said, keeping his distance from the man named Morgan, who politely said thank you.  
Slightly glaring at the man, Ryan sat next to Daryl, wanting to be close to him. Ryan noticed Rick coming in, but didn’t pay attention to any words he said, to Morgan. Ryan just focussed on Daryl.  
“You smell.” He nodded, and looked up to the eating man. “Let me bathe you.”  
Daryl didn’t object, and after placing his bowl in the sink, he followed Ryan upstairs.  
Ryan took Daryl to the bathroom, locking it. While Ryan had locked the bathroom door, Daryl had started undressing. “What happened here?” He asked, gruffy as always.  
Sighing, Ryan stretched slightly. “Rick found out Pete was abusing Jessie. It turned into a huge brawl, resulting in this evening’s meeting.” He said, and saw Daryl sitting on the shower chair. “Pete was drunk and had stolen Michonne’s sword off the wall, and came to the meeting, resulting in slicing Reg’s throat. From there you’re up to date.” Ryan said, and stroked through Daryl’s hair, before grabbing the showerhead, and turning the shower on. “I saved you some warm water.” Ryan said, feeling the water got to a nice temperature, and made sure every inch of Daryl was now wet and ready to wash. Grabbing some shampoo, Ryan started with Daryl’s long, wet hair, and started washing him. “What happened on your trip?” He asked softly.  
“Nothin’ much.” Daryl answered, looking at the tiles of the shower. “Got trapped in a car with Walker’s all ‘round. Morgan rescued us.”  
“Hm.” Ryan hummed in recognition. “Glad you made it back in one piece.”  
“Yeah.” That was all Daryl said, before a long silence.  
Ryan just let the shampoo in Daryl’s hair while he started washing the dirty body of his lover.  
“Them Walkers we walked into all had these… W’s carved in their forehead.” Daryl said, motioning where the W’s would have been placed.  
“Hm…” Ryan hummed once again. “Weird...”  
After Daryl’s body was clean, Ryan rinsed off the soap, and made sure his hair was shampoo-free. “There.” Ryan smiled softly, stroking Daryl’s hair back. “All clean and fancy again.”  
Daryl stood up, and looked at Ryan. “Fancy hm…” He nummed. “I ain’t fancy.”  
“With your hair back you look fancy though.” He winked, grabbing a towel. “Sit.” Ryan ordered. “I’m not done yet.”  
As Daryl sat down again, Ryan started to dry Daryl’s hair, making his hair all messy. “This is more like you.” He smiled and started drying the rest of Daryl’s body.  
Once done, Ryan looked up, and threw the towel over the shower chair. “Off to bed with you.” He winked, knowing Daryl was tired. For once, Daryl didn’t resist, and got into bed, without putting anything on. Ryan stripped himself from his clothing, but before he could dress himself up in his night clothes, Daryl spoke. “Don’t. Sleep naked with me.”  
Ryan was a tad surprised by the request. “Hm?” But before he said anything else, Ryan sat on the edge of the bed, in his underwear. “I’ll keep my underwear on.” He nodded, and removed his prosthesis with a soft smile, until he felt Daryl’s hand snaking up and down his back. “Daryl…” Ryan snickered softly, and shivered slightly. “You really should sleep instead of toying with me.”  
“But I missed ya.” Daryl said, his eyes scanning Ryan’s body. “And ya’re pretty.”  
Blushing, Ryan looked at Daryl. “Well…”  
“Don’t try to fight it.” Daryl said, looking into Ryan’s eyes with his own blue eyes. Usually having a cold tone in his eyes, that was completely gone when alone with Ryan, replacing the cold tone with a warm, loving one.  
“Well, mister Dixon…” Ryan got under the blankets after throwing his prosthesis away, scooting a bit closer to Daryl. “Better?” He asked, and held Daryl’s hand gently. “Sleep, tomorrow is a new day.” He nodded, making himself comfortable.  
“Yeah…” Daryl said, and turned so he faced Ryan falling asleep. “Good night.” He said, and got a nod in return. Daryl didn’t miss the soft smile on Ryan’s face as they both fell asleep, hand in hand. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long to update, but I hoped you enjoyed this chapter! I'm motivated to write more again, so hopefully in a short while, there will be a new chapter!
> 
> (This fic doesn't have a beta-reader, so please excuse any mistakes!)


	12. Work

The sun started to raise, and with the first ray, Daryl shot up, looking around. The first thing he saw was an empty bed, which he found odd because Ryan had fallen asleep with him, hand in hand. After a few seconds of observing the sounds around him, Daryl heard the shower running. He got up, noticing he had fallen asleep naked last night, and quickly got to the bathroom, which was locked.  
“Ryan?” Daryl asked hard enough for the person inside to hear, and knocked the door softly, so it wouldn’t wake anyone up in the house.  
Daryl hears someone hopping inside, making it clear it was Ryan under the shower, and within a few seconds, Ryan opened the door slightly. “Daryl.” He said, a tad surprised.  
“Can I shower with ya?” Daryl asked, this being the first time he actually wanted to shower, despite having showered the evening before.  
Ryan was still surprised, which was visible on his face, but he nodded, and let Daryl in. “Of course.” He smiled, and locked the door behind them as Daryl was in completely.  
“Lemme help ya.” Daryl said, pulling Ryan’s arm around his shoulder, and took him back to the shower, which had a nice temperature. Gently Daryl placed Ryan back on the shower chair, and grabbed some shampoo to wash his hair. “Ya like to shower, hm?” Daryl asked, noticing this was already the third time they were in the shower together.  
Ryan nodded, and relaxed as Daryl started massaging his scalp with the shampoo. “Hmm, I especially like it with you.” He said softly.  
Daryl huffed slightly, and made sure the shampoo wouldn’t hit Ryan’s eyes. “Yeah, same.” He admitted. “I only shower ‘cause of ya.”  
Ryan laughed softly. “Yeah right. You secretly do it because you like it.”  
That made Daryl roll his eyes, and he rinsed out the shampoo out of Ryan’s blonde hair, before grabbing some soap to wash Ryan’s body. Seeing the delicate skin of his lover, Daryl wanted to touch him all over, feel Ryan’s hot breath on his skin, and hold him close while they were naked together.  
“What are you thinking about?” Ryan suddenly asked, when Daryl stood in front of him.  
Daryl looked into Ryan’s blue eyes. “Nothin’.” He said, and sat on his knees to wash Ryan’s legs and his one foot.  
Blushing, Ryan looked at his one foot, and wriggled his toes. “They’ve never been so clean.” He snickered softly. “You should wash me more often.” Ryan winked, and leaned in to kiss Daryl’s hair gently.  
Looking up, Daryl snorted. “You can do it yaself too, y’know.”  
“Yeah.” Ryan said, and smiled innocently. “But I just like it when you do it.”  
Daryl didn’t break eye contact, and smirked, rinsing Ryan off. “Ya’re done.”  
Smiling, Ryan stood up, and kissed Daryl softly. “Thank you.”  
“No problem.” Daryl answered softly, and kissed Ryan’s cheek, while traveling his hands up and down Ryan’s body. “Should we…”  
Ryan knew what Daryl wanted, and nodded. “We should.” He confirmed, and kissed Daryl again, deeply. Their tongues danced for domination, and Ryan held Daryl’s waist gently while Daryl traveled his hands to Ryan’s butt, pinching it softly.  
“Ah, Daryl.” Ryan giggled softly, and held onto Daryl’s shoulders, slightly grinding against him. Ryan felt Daryl’s member growing harder as he kept moving up against him. “You’re getting hard…”  
“I know.” Daryl said, and looked at Ryan. “Hold on to the shower rail.” He whispered, and placed Ryan how he wanted; half bent over, while holding on to the shower rail, which was installed for people who needed it to stand up.  
Ryan didn’t complain, and stood like that, knowing what would happen. “Daryl…” He said softly with a smile, but what happened next was something he didn’t expect.  
Daryl teased his entrance a bit, and then spread Ryan’s ass-cheeks, and started rimming him. “Ah! Daryl!” Ryan brought out, still having his voice low because it was pretty early, and he’d feel uncomfortable if people heard them.  
Daryl continued, making sure Ryan felt loved. His own member stood up proudly, waiting for some attention too.  
Stopping the rimming to catch his breath, Daryl kissed each bum gently, and slowly entered a finger into Ryan, letting him get used to the feeling, before adding a second.  
With each movement Daryl did, Ryan moaned softly, and clasped the rail tightly. “Hng! D-Daryl…” Ryan huffed softly, with a smile. He enjoyed this intercourse already.  
“Ya feel tight, Ryan.” Daryl said softly, and started scissoring Ryan slightly, causing Ryan to huf even more.  
After a while of having two fingers in, and feeling Ryan relax under his touch, Daryl added a third one, making sure Ryan would be properly prepared for penetration.  
Removing his fingers, Daryl replaced them with his hard cock, making Ryan hold on to the shower rail even tighter, and moan softly.  
“Daryl…” Ryan moaned softly. “Give me a minute…” He nodded, and bit his lip, until he relaxed, and gave Daryl the sign he could move in further.  
Slowly Daryl pressed himself in, and kissed Ryan’s neck gently. “Ya’re doin’ good.” He encouraged Ryan, and waited once he was completely in.  
Once Ryan gave the sign to go, Daryl started thrusting slowly, making Ryan gasp softly. Reaching out for his own member, Ryan slowly jerked himself off. “Ah… Daryl…” He moaned softly, and soon felt Daryl’s hand on his own, helping him jerk off.  
Daryl loved the soft sounds Ryan made, and started to make a nice hickey in Ryan’s neck. “Hm…” Came out of Daryl’s throat as he did so, and tightened his hand around Ryan’s hand a bit more, causing the other to moan loudly.  
“Daryl!” Ryan brought out, louder than he wanted, and quickly bit his lip. “Hng…” He groaned instead, hoping nobody had heard Ryan moan so loud.  
Noticing Ryan was all relaxed, and enjoying the sex, Daryl went faster, and deeper with his thrusts, causing Ryan to hold on to the rail even tighter. Out of Daryl’s throat came soft grunts, as he wasn’t a moaner himself. The hand around Ryan’s hand traveled up to Ryan’s chest, stroking one of the pinkish nipples.  
“Daryl…” Ryan whimpered, almost unable to stop moaning his name. Ryan had stopped jerking himself off, and held Daryl’s hand gently. “I’m close…”  
Daryl nodded. “Me too.” He grunted, and thrusted a few more times, before pulling out, and released over Ryan’s back. After that, he started jerking Ryan off again, who released within a few jerks. Clinging onto the shower rail, Ryan panted. “Fuck… That felt so good, Daryl…” He whispered, with a soft smile, and turned around slowly. “Come here.”  
Obeying Ryan’s request, Daryl got closer, getting kissed on the lips. “Hm.”  
Looking up at the older man, Ryan released from the kiss, and softly smiled. “Thank you.”  
“Thank you too…” Daryl whispered back, and kissed Ryan for a second, before grabbing some soap, and a washing cloth to clean Ryan’s back, after rinsing the cum off his back.  
The rest of the shower was quiet, and quite loving. Ryan helped Daryl wash his hair, and back, while Daryl helped Ryan with his back.  
Despite washing themselves more than they needed, Ryan appreciated the freshness. After having dried themselves, and having dressed themselves, the pair walked out of the shower, only to be met with a smirking Carl.  
“You guys don’t sit still, hm?” He laughed, causing Ryan to turn red, and Daryl to look away.  
“Shut up.” Ryan said, and hopped past Carl, off to get his prosthesis on, Daryl following him. Carl on the other hand, went into the shower. “I hope it’s clean!”

“Ryan!”  
Ryan had been strolling through Alexandria, enjoying the sun on his face, despite last night. But Father Gabriel decided to call him, making Ryan sigh, and turn. “What do you want, Gabriel?” Ryan almost spat out the name, making Gabriel nervous.  
“I wish to speak to you…” He said, in a nervous manner, and almost trembled on his feet.  
“Listen to me, Gabriel.” Ryan almost growled, being angry with the man. “What you said about us, about Rick, about the whole group, isn’t true! And you know that!”  
“I know, but…”  
“No buts, Gabriel!” Ryan spat. “What was your goal? Getting us out, while saving your own ass? You’re a coward! Do me a favor, and keep your excuses for yourself. I don’t even want to hear them, just like your views on gay people. Don’t even speak to me, if you can’t treat me normally.”  
Ryan was furious at the priest, and stepped closer to the guy, with narrowed eyes, giving a ‘don’t you dare say something stupid’ look.  
Gabriel on the other hand, backed off immediately, causing Ryan to grit his teeth. “Grow some balls.” He growled, and stomped off.  
Maggie had seen Ryan react so severe to Gabriel, and she quickly cut off her conversation with Glenn. “Ryan!” She came running, and luckily for her, she didn’t touch Ryan. “Ryan, what’s wrong?” She asked, walking next to him.  
“That motherfucker…” Ryan growled, and looked at some houses, standing still in the middle of the road. “He thinks I will forgive him for what he said about us?!”  
Maggie shook her head. “No, but he tries.” She said, and walked a bit through Alexandria with Ryan.  
“How, Maggie? How does he even try?” Ryan sighed, and looked into the distance. “He almost banned us from this place.”  
“You feel at home here.” Maggie didn’t ask it, she knew it, and Ryan nodded.  
“Yeah, I actually do. It seems like this is the best time of my life, and things are going strong with Daryl.” Ryan did look at Maggie’s expression when he mentioned Daryl, but she kindly smiled, and nodded. “Believe me, we know.” She laughed, causing Ryan to turn red.  
“Anyways…” Ryan tried to change topics again. “How are you and Glenn doing? Still going strong too, I suppose.” He winked, and showed a half smile to the woman, who laughed.  
“Jup, still going strong too.” She said, still showing the kind smile. Ryan couldn’t help but see the worry on her face, as Glenn had been absent from yesterday’s meeting, and he hadn’t been present right now as well.  
The pair went to the infirmary, checking on Tara. “You’re awake!” Ryan said, as soon as his vision laid upon Tara, who was sitting upright in the bed, still weak.  
“Hey there.” She offered a smirk to the blonde guy, before they both were interrupted by two pair of feet making it into the infirmary; Glenn and Nicolas.  
Maggie was torn; she wanted to take care of Tara, but she also wanted to take care of her man.  
“It’s okay, I’m fine.” Tara told Maggie, and turned her attention to Ryan again, before Eugene got in. He had this shocked, and happy look on his face once he saw Tara was awake. “Holy shit.” Came out of his mouth, before walking over to the girl in the bed.  
“Thank God, your hair is still on.” Tara smirked, but Eugene’s expression didn’t change. “Eugene is creeping me out a bit… Can someone send Noah in to protect me?”  
When Tara had said that, Eugene’s smirk vanished, and Maggie looked up, concerned and sad.  
Ryan saw these emotions change, and decided to break the silence. “Noah is dead.”  
Also Tara’s face changed, and she bit her lip.  
“He died on the run, when you were out.” He continued to talk, but got cut off by Tara.  
“Sorry, I can’t hear this any more. So please, stop.” She said, having visible tears in her eyes, mourning her friend.  
Respecting her limit, Ryan nodded, and got up, walking out of the infirmary, back onto the streets of Alexandria. In front of one of their houses, Daryl was maintaining his motorcycle, so Ryan couldn’t help but join him. “Hey there.” He said, sitting next to Daryl, looking at all the complex parts.  
“Hey,” Daryl said with a quite scruffy voice. “What’s up?”  
“Tara is awake.” Ryan told Daryl, not looking at the man who put down his work to look at Ryan. When Ryan noticed that, he did look at Daryl’s direction, but not directly at him. “Gabriel also came to me, to have a word with me, but I didn’t want to hear anything from him.”  
“Hm,” Daryl hummed, unsure how to respond. “And?”  
“I think he is full of shit, so I told him not to speak to me anymore if he can’t accept how I am.”  
Ryan noticed himself getting worked up more, so he took a deep breath, and hugged his knees. “I don’t trust a single hair on his body, which isn’t much.” Ryan said, mocking the bald priest.  
Daryl had started to work on the motorcycle again, while softly snickering about the other’s mocking, when Rick got out of the house.  
“So he was okay with it?” Daryl asked Rick, as they apparently had some conversation before.  
“It was pretty much his idea.” Rick replied, walking off the porch. “He gets it.”  
“‘T’s got a bed ‘nd a bath, but it’s still a cage y’know.” Daryl replied, after tie-wrapping something, and looked up to Rick, who walked around the motorcycle.  
“He gets it.” Rick repeated, looking down at Daryl, with his bandaged face. “He told me what happened out there with the trucks.”  
Ryan looked up, not having heard the complete story from Daryl, and Daryl also looked up.  
“And about those guys we met? With the ‘W’’s?” Daryl stood up, and made the ‘W’ sign in front of his own forehead.  
“Like those Walkers, yeah.” Rick nodded, looking at Daryl directly now. “We need more watch points, and I’m gonna tell Deanna we don’t need to go look for people anymore.” Rick changed the subject.  
Daryl took the words in, looking at Rick, before nodding slightly, moving awkwardly.  
“You feel different about it?” Rick asked, knowing something was on Daryl’s mind right now.  
“Yeah…” Daryl said after a few seconds of silence, and after a few nods before looking at Rick again. “I do.”  
“People out there, they need to take care of themselves, just like us.” Rick argued calmly, causing Daryl to stay silent, and Ryan want to argue, but he kept out of it.  
“I’m gonna get him out. Shouldn’t leave him in there any longer than we have to.” Rick gave Daryl a final glance, before walking off.  
Getting up, Ryan walked to Daryl, standing next to him to see Rick walk off.  
“He locked that Morgan guy?” Ryan asked, still looking at Rick, who walked into one of the unfinished homes.  
“Yup.” Daryl said, before getting on the ground again to work on his motorcycle.  
Sighing, Ryan walked back into the house, as he would do some of his laundry. Right now, he was wearing clothing which were already in the closet before Ryan had claimed them. Putting his own clothes into the bathroom sink, adding washing powder and water, Ryan washed them. “You do that more often?” A voice sounded, which Ryan recognised.  
“Sometimes.” He said, looking up to Carol, who leaned in the entrance of the bathroom. “I’m actually really glad I am able to wash my clothes now.” He admitted. “Walking around in the same clothes for months just isn’t my preference.”  
“Nobody likes that.” Carol answered, taking the clean clothes from Ryan, before walking to the front, letting the clothes dry on the porch. Ryan followed her, hanging the last pieces of clothes he had washed, including one of Daryl’s claimed shirts.  
Seeing Eugene at the gates, he knew that wasn’t his shift, so Ryan walked to the gate, only to see Eugene open the gate to strangers. Wanting to run in, Ryan got stopped by Olivia, who was on her way to the pantry again. She didn’t touch him, but she stopped him by holding up her hands.  
“Don’t.” She told Ryan, with a soft smile on her face. “They live here.”  
Ryan looked at Olivia, a bit confused, but trusted her words. Relaxing his body, he saw the people come in.  
“That are Heath, Scott and Annie. They have been on a supply run the past weeks. I’m glad they made it back.” Olivia explained some more before continuing to the pantry. Sighing, Ryan walked through Alexandria some more, before deciding to stop by at Denise’s, to continue the treatment. 

A while later, everyone got gathered in Deanna’s house, as there was something important Rick needed to discuss with everybody. Most of the people from Alexandria were there too. Sitting with Daryl at the window, Ryan listened to what Rick had to say; There was a huge quarry of Walkers not too far from Alexandria, locked in with trucks. Heath explained he had noticed the quarry early on, when it was still small. Yet, they never had gone back there.  
“So they got drawn by the sound.” Michonne spoke. “They make more sound, and they draw more in.” She spoke, explaining it for those who didn’t understand.  
Sighing and nodding, Rick spoke after Michonne. “And here we are.” He looked around the room. “Now what I’m proposing, I know it sounds risky, but Walkers are already slipping through the exits. One of the trucks keeping the Walkers in, could go over the edge any day now. Maybe after one more hard rain. That exit sends them East. All of them. Right at us.” Rick waited a moment before talking further. “It isn’t about if it gives, but when. It’s gonna happen. That’s why we have to do this soon.”  
“This is, ehm,” Carol spoke, in her sweet voice she kept up for the Alexandrians. “I don’t even have an other word for it. This is terrifying. All of it.” She looked slightly around the room too, before looking into Rick’s eyes again. “But it sounds like there isn’t any other way.”  
“Maybe there is.” An Alexandrian spoke, someone Ryan didn’t know. “Couldn’t we just build up the weak spots? I could draw plans, I worked with Reg on the wall, in the construction crew. We could make this place safe…”  
“Even if we could,” Rick interrupted the man. “The sound of these Walkers would draw in more and more every day. It won’t change a thing.”  
“We’re gonna do what Rick says. The plan he has laid out.” Deanna spoke, who had been looking out of a window the entire time.  
“I told you all, we’re gonna have Daryl lead them away.” Rick spoke, after Deanna stayed quiet after she spoke.  
“Me too.” Sasha spoke, looking at Rick from the couch. “I’ll take a car, ride next to him. Can’t just be him. I’ll keep ‘em coming, Daryl keeps them from being sloppy.”  
“I’ll go with her,” Abraham suddenly spoke, sitting on one of the chairs at the couch. “It’s a long way to ride solo.”  
“We’ll have two teams. One of each side of the forest, help manage this thing.” Rick spoke, and made handsigns. “We’ll have a few people on watch from now on. Rosita, Spencer and Holly, so they’re out. So, who’s in?”  
Michonne, who stood with her arms crossed, moved one hand up. “Me.” She spoke, while looking at the ground. People started whispering in the room, and Daryl did as well, leaning in to elbow Ryan softly. “I want ya to stay here.” He told Ryan, causing Ryan to look back.  
“I can help.” He spoke, looking at Daryl, who clearly was concerned.  
“I’m in.” Glenn spoke, and that’s when Gabriel also started to speak.  
The priest, who had been silent all the time, raised his hand, and stepped forward. “I’d like to help as well.” He spoke, but Rick cut him off.  
“No. Who else?” Rick clearly didn’t trust Gabriel anymore, and Ryan was relieved about that; he wasn’t the only one who clearly didn’t trust the priest. “We need more.”  
“There’s got to be another play.” The man who Ryan didn’t know spoke again. “We just can’t control that many.”  
“I’ve said it before; Walkers herd up, they follow a path if something is drawing them. That’s how we get them all at once.”  
“And we should just take your word for it?” The man clearly didn’t like Rick’s ideas, and wanted to have a discussion. “We’re just supposed to follow in line behind you after…”  
It got silent again.  
“After what?” Rick spoke, narrowing his eyes.  
“After you wave a gun around, screaming, pointing it at people. After you shoot a man in the face. After...” The man spoke with disgust to Rick, until Deanna stepped in. “Enough!”  
Rick and the man glared at each other, before Rick looked around the room again.  
“I’ll do it.” Heath said, followed by Annie. “Me too.”  
“Whatever you need,” An other Alexandian spoke, Tobin. “I’m in.” He patted Rick on the back, before looking around the room as well.  
“Now, who else?” Deanna asked, having turned around.  
Ryan saw Glenn looking at Nicolas, and Glenn shook his head, after the other man had betrayed him, and killed Noah, Glenn didn’t want any more deaths by Nicolas’s hands. Yet, Nicolas, who had looked at Glenn when he shook his head, raised his hand and stepped forward. “I’ll go.”  
“Jesus.” Ryan muttered under his breath  
“We have to do this. I need to help.” Nicolas looked at Glenn when he spoke these words, and Ryan sighed, getting up, and left the room. For the ones of Ricks group, it was a sign, yet they let the guy go his way. Stopping Ryan wouldn’t have any benefits, they knew that much.  
Hearing some more talking, Ryan didn’t stop walking, and actually walked to one of the watch points, looking over the wall. Nothing to see, except woods.  
After the meeting, everyone went and did their thing again, so Ryan got down, and walked around, noticing a small group on Deanna’s porch, discussing the plan. Sighing, Ryan walked further, to see if his clothes were dried again. They would execute a part of the plan the next day, and he didn’t want to walk around in ‘strange’ clothes; Ryan needed to wear his own clothes if he wanted to feel comfortable on a mission. 

The next morning, at the rising of the sun, Daryl and Ryan got up, and got dressed for today. They would build a curve for the Walkers to follow the path they had discussed.  
“Ya don’t have to, y’know.” Daryl spoke, but got a quick response from Ryan.  
“I want to. It will be safer for all of us.” Ryan spoke. “Besides, I’m not a poor puppy who can’t do shit, Daryl. I’ve managed before I met you guys.”  
“Yeah, I know.” Daryl said, defeated, and put his boots on. “Ya riding the bike with me?” He asked, and got met with a smirk.  
“Hell yeah.” Ryan spoke, and strapped on his prosthesis, before letting his pants fall over it, and tied his shoes. Because they went outside of the walls, Ryan took his gun, which he had gotten back after the Reg and Pete incident, and his bat with him. The knife he had gotten from Daryl was still safely in his boot, for when he needed a stealthy and quick kill. He walked to the bathroom to wash his face, and looked into the mirror. The scar on the side of his head was clearly visible, causing Ryan to sigh, and look away again.  
“You look fine, Ryan, really.” Maggie stood in the doorway, wanting to use the bathroom as well.  
“Hm.” Ryan hummed, before walking out, and met up with Daryl downstairs, who seemed to have heard what Maggie had said. “She’s right.”  
“Oh shut up.” Ryan snickered, and walked out of the house, seeing the life return to Alexandria. People were getting ready to help the wall for the curve.  
“Come, I’ll get the motorcycle out.” Daryl said, and walked to the garage where it was stored. Ryan looked at it, and honestly, he liked the motorcycle, despite it being pretty rusty. Touching the seat, Ryan smiled, and walked after Daryl, who brought the motorcycle outside. Starting up the motor, he got on, and nodded for Ryan to get on the back. Ryan nodded, and got on the back, holding onto Daryl with both hands as they drove off to the destination.  
Once there, they weren’t the first as some of the Alexandria residents were busy building already, and Rick was overviewing the lot. Daryl and Ryan greeted Rick, and parked the bike, before getting directions to work as well. 

It was somewhere in the afternoon, and everyone was still working hard to get everything done. Carol came by with something to drink, and Ryan thanked her politely, sitting in the shadow for a second as his leg started to hurt.  
“You okay?” Ryan heard a familiar voice talk to him. Looking up, Ryan saw it was the red haired man; Abraham.  
“Yeah, I am. My leg hurts a bit.” He said, squinting his eyes against the sun. “You?”  
Abraham nodded. “Yep.” He said, looking around. “Help me when you can?” He asked after a little while, which surprised Ryan a bit; he never really talked a lot with Abraham.  
“Yeah, sure.” Ryan said, taking a sip from the water he had received from Carol. But before Ryan could do something with Abraham, he heard some walkers coming, from the side where Carter was, the Alexandrian who didn’t agree to Rick’s plans.  
“Here they come…” Ryan got up, and got his bat, walking to the group of residents, who got warned by Rick. They seemed to panic, yet Rick wanted them to take care of themselves. Ryan stood there, next to Daryl who had his crossbow up. Carter, and the people working with him panicked.  
“Use your shovels, guns will draw more.” Rick instructed, but the scared group didn’t know what to do.  
“Help us…” Carter pleaded, but Rick didn’t give in.  
“You can do this. You need to. All of you.” Rick said, but the Walkers kept closing in. The other Alexandrians, who had heard the commotion, started to panic too, and Morgan couldn’t help himself, getting in with his long stick to beat some Walkers down.  
“Morgan, don’t.” Rick had said, wanting to stop him, but it was too late. “Shit…” Now Rick started to get in for help too, as well as Michonne, Daryl and Ryan. Ryan batted a Walkers skull in, while Daryl used his crossbow to shoot a Walker through the head.  
Michonne cut the upper part of a Walker’s head as well, and Rick stabbed a Walker right in the brain.  
Once all Walkers were dead, Ryan sighed, and got a cloth out of the pocket of his pants, cleaning his bat. He walked back to the spot where he had been sitting, and sighed, making sure every bit of grime was off.  
“Ya got some sweet hits.” Abraham walked to Ryan, looking around for more of the Walkers. “Baseball player before?”  
Shaking his head, Ryan put the cloth away. “I just… hung out a lot at the baseball field at school.” He said, and looked to the ginger man. “Anything was better than home at that time.” Ryan slightly opened up to the man, convinced Rick had told him quite a bit about Ryan’s past already.  
“So… You and Daryl, hm.” Abraham said, sitting next to Ryan against the tree, causing Ryan to scoot a bit further from the man. “Don’t mind me asking, but you guys have been playing for the other team, hm? Or for both teams. Been past the second base already? Have you been at the third base, or even had the home run?” Abraham wasn’t someone to be a dickhead about gay people; he might look and act tough, but he was always open to learn something new.  
Ryan looked at Abraham a bit confused, and thought about the metaphors he had used.  
“We… Had the home run for quite a while now?” Ryan said, hesitant about what Abraham meant, but it probably meant how far the couple went.  
“Interesting.” He said, looking in front of him. “You do the pitching, or the catching?”  
“Dude, are we even having this conversation now?” Ryan wasn’t really comfortable about this topic, especially with a guy he didn’t know very well.  
“What?” Abraham brought out surprised. “I’m trying to get to know you two better.”  
Shaking his head, Ryan got up, using the shoelace around a loop on his pants, originally designed to hold a belt, and strapped his bat on there again. It wasn’t always convenient, but it worked fine. “Well… Let’s get back to work again. This wall isn’t going to build itself.” He said, and walked off to help some of the Alexandrians building. 

After working hard, the group of Alexandrians, and the people of ‘Rick’s group’, had made it back, safe and sound, to Alexandria, and everyone was busy making dinner, and looking after their family and community. Ryan had gone back to the bedroom, and laid on the bed, reading the book he had started. He also had removed his prosthesis, as it slightly hurt again.  
“Readin’ that fairytale ‘gain, hm?” Daryl said, leaning in the door opening, standing there to observe Ryan a bit, on which Ryan replied by nodding.  
“Yeah,” Ryan said a bit later than the nod, and turned the page. “It’s… interesting, I guess.”  
Daryl pushed himself off the doorpost, and walked to the bed, sitting on the edge, and stroked Ryan’s leg gently.  
That surprised Ryan slightly, and looked up from his book. “Hm?”  
The expression Ryan showed was pretty amusing to Daryl, as there was a glint to be found in Ryan’s eyes. “Like that, hm?” Daryl muttered, and kept continuing to gently stroke the leg.  
Putting the book down, Ryan nodded, laying a bit more down, and touched Daryl’s hand gently, feeling how it went up and down his own leg, but eventually stopped at his tight. This made Ryan swallow, but he didn’t push Daryl’s hand away.  
Deciding to do the unexpected, Ryan leaned in, and pecked Daryl’s lips, before noticing someone in the door opening. Quickly, Ryan shot up again, slightly moving away from Daryl, who also looked up.  
In the door opening was Glenn, who only smiled kindly.  
“Oh, did I interrupt something?” He asked, still having his smile on his face. It wasn’t a mean smile, so Ryan and Daryl eased up a little.  
“No, you’re not interrupting, Glenn.” Ryan said, and offered a slight smile back. “What’s up?”  
“Just wanting to make sure you guys know the plan.” He said, stepping in hesitantly.  
Daryl hummed. “We know.” He replied, and kept an eye on Glenn before getting up, and walked out of the room.  
Both Ryan and Glenn watched after him, before looking at each other.  
“How are you, Ryan?” Glenn asked, scooting a bit over to Ryan, who did move away slightly.  
“I’m fine,” Ryan answered, stroking through his hair slightly. “Just a bit tired from the hard work today.”  
“Yeah,” Glenn nodded, and looked out of the window. “This will work. I know it will. It has to.”  
Nodding at that statement, Ryan looked outside of the window as well, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. “It has to…”  
Glenn looked at Ryan again, and offered his smile again. Glenn saw Ryan was trying his best. For the community, for everyone.  
“You seem to be happier.” Glenn eventually spoke, and wanted to lay his hand on Ryan’s shoulder, only for Ryan to move away slightly. “No.”  
“Sorry,” Glenn said, and withdrew his hand. “I know you don’t like to be touched.”  
“Only Daryl.” Ryan replied, and scratched the back of his neck slightly. “I trust him.”  
Glenn smiled, and nodded. “He loves you too,”  
Looking back at Glenn, Ryan listened.  
“Daryl was really concerned when you disappeared.” Glenn explained. “He lost it in the church. The church that was run by Father Gabriel.”  
Ryan was oddly interested in hearing the story. “In the church?”  
“Yeah,” Glenn said softly. “He couldn’t help but blame himself. Father Gabriel tried to calm him, resulting into him breaking one of the benches. Or more, I’m not sure. Anyways, eventually he saw the car with the white cross, and he just.. Followed it.”  
Nodding, Ryan changed his position slightly, but kept looking at Glenn. “I didn’t know that.”  
“I’d be surprised if you did.” Glenn laughed softly, and stood up. “Come, we got some dinner.”  
Nodding as a sign Ryan understood it, he waited until Glenn was gone, before he got up, and went to get some food. He took a plate, and filled it with a little of the dinner. It looked delicious, yet Ryan didn’t want to eat much. There were enough mouths to feed, and of course not too much food as there used to be before the outbreak.  
Ryan often thought back, especially since he, and the group, got used to Alexandria. Was this how life should be before the outbreak? Carl, who had seen Ryan zone off, sat near him with his own plate of food.  
“What are you thinking about?” Carl asked, poking his food with his fork, before eating.  
Looking up, Ryan shrugged slightly. “About life before.”  
“Oh, right.” Carl said, knowing Ryan’s backstory. He didn’t know if he had triggered the older guy by asking that question, but once Ryan continued to talk, Carl knew it was okay.  
“Was it like… this? But with unlimited food, and space to go. And money, of course.” Ryan spoke, wondering how the normal life was for Carl. “How was it for you?”  
Carl thought back at the time before the outbreak. “Mom and dad had some difficulties before the outbreak.” He spoke, despite his late-mother, and father thinking Carl didn’t know, he knew. “I went to school from Monday to Friday… nothing different, I guess. Except… now we just have the basics, I guess.” Carl said, shrugging, and continued to eat.  
Ryan listened, and nodded. He guessed it was about the same as he was used to, only more loving than what he knew.  
“Did you have many friends?” Carl asked, but Ryan shook his head.  
“No. Not much. I often spoke to some classmates, but that was for some of the assignments. I had a better bond with my teacher though.” He said, shrugging slightly. “You know, the one that gave me the baseball bat, because he saw potential.”  
“You told me something like that, yeah. Back at the prison.” Carl did remember the others story, which made Ryan hum softly, before taking a bite.  
“You remembered well.” he spoke to Carl, and swallowed his food. Once the plate was empty, Ryan went to clean it, and stretched out afterwards, hearing a thank you from Carol, and went outside, to take a stroll through Alexandria. The weather was nice, and not too hot, so Ryan didn’t sweat during the stroll, nor felt cold. He stopped to sit at the pond for a bit, watching the water and how the sky got a bit darker over time, before getting up. Slowly, some lights in the houses of Alexandria started to dim; people were going to bed. Looking at the two houses of ‘their group’, Ryan saw some rooms were dark already too, as well as his and Daryl’s room. Was Daryl asleep already? Quietly, Ryan walked into the house, up the stairs and to their bedroom. Careful to not make much noise, Ryan opened the door, and got in. After closing the door again, he pulled off his shoes while sitting on his side of the bed, and also undid his prosthesis, massaging his stump for a bit, before pulling off his clothes. He would sleep in his underwear. He didn’t want to sleep without his underwear though.  
Next to him was Daryl, also asleep without clothes and probably with his underwear on too, softly snoring. The sight, and the soft sounds made Ryan smile softly, and laid in bed, against the other, and stroked Daryl’s long hair.  
Daryl noticed the soft strokes, and shot awake, causing Ryan to get startled and scooted away quickly. “Don’t hurt me!” He squeaked, his hands in front of his face, as if he could make a barrier between the two of them.  
“Hm… Ryan… ‘m not gonna hurt ya…” Daryl grumbled. “Just surprised ya stroked ma hair.”  
Daryl had clearly been woken up by Ryan’s actions, but the older man didn’t mind.  
“I’m sorry!” Still afraid, Ryan kept his hands up, and his legs pulled to his chest.  
“Don’t.” Daryl remained calm, and kept his distance. “’m not angry, Ryan. I want ya to continue…” Daryl muttered softly, but wanted Ryan to calm down first. “Take some deep breaths, ‘kay?”  
Ryan had a few difficulties calming down from the scare, but nodded anyways. Daryl kept sitting up, watching the other, to see of Ryan would calm down, and breathed with him. Sitting like Buddha, after moving the sheets away for a bit, Daryl observed the other, and once Ryan had calmed down, and came to his senses, Ryan crawled closer, onto Daryl’s lap. The younger American wrapped his legs around the Redneck's waist and his arms around the other’s shoulders, while Daryl also wrapped his arms around the other, and pressed a kiss on top of the blonde hair.  
“Ya feel better now, hm?” Daryl asked softly, and stroked softly through the short hair of the other.  
“Hm…” Ryan hummed, not really reacting much to the other said, but more to the others touches. Daryl noticed Ryan wasn’t too focussed on his words, and kept gently holding the other, touching Ryan’s hair, gently scratching the other’s scalp. Even the tough guys, who both had killed dozens of Walkers, as well as humans, needed some comfort time with each other.  
And that was how Ryan fell asleep, sitting against Daryl, holding him close, and listening to the older guy’s heartbeat. Not that Daryl cared. He gently laid the two of them down without waking Ryan up, and also fell asleep with the younger boy in his arms. 

When Daryl woke up, Ryan was still asleep, on top of Daryl. Ryan had his hand on the other’s hair, and in his sleep he stroked the long, brown locks. Sleeping with nothing but underwear had been nice for the both of them, despite the morning sun getting warmer.  
“Hm…” Ryan hummed, and shifted, before blinking twice and woke up slowly. “Mornin’...”  
“Ya start to talk like me.” Daryl snickered, who had been watching the other on his chest.  
“I’m not…” Ryan sat up, on the other’s belly, and smiled softly. “Why… Hello there.” He said, stretching out.  
Raising an eyebrow, Daryl had a slight smirk on his face. “Hey.” He answered, and had his hands on the others hips.  
After the stretch, Ryan looked down at Daryl, and pressed a soft kiss on the others lips, while holding on to Daryl’s shoulders.  
“How did ya sleep?” The older guy asked, still having his hands on Ryan’s hips, and gently stroked his thumbs over the soft, ivory-like colored skin.  
“Good.” Ryan spoke, having a smile on his face. “And you?”  
“Yea, too.” Daryl said and nodded. Daryl reached out for Ryan’s cheek, cupping it with his left hand. Ryan nuzzled the hand, and brought his own hand to Daryl’s, pressing it a bit more into his cheek.  
“I can feel ya stubbles.” Daryl snickered, not having Ryan imagined with a beard.  
Having a good mood, Ryan snickered softly. “Shall I keep a beard?” He asked, scratching his chin, feeling the stubble as well. “Like Rick had?”  
“No.” Daryl quickly said, and wanted to sit up, yet he didn’t because Ryan sat on top of him. “If it were up to me, ya should also shave down there… If ya ever get hair.” He said, and turned red, while Ryan got a smirk on his face.  
“Down there, hm?” Ryan snickered softly, and pulled his underwear a bit down, showing there wasn’t any hair to shave. And if there was; it wasn’t noticeable.  
“I don’t really have pubes, Daryl.” Ryan said teasingly. “I’ve been bald there all my life, unlike you.”  
“Hey!”  
“Don’t act as if you don’t have pubes, mister bear.” Ryan continued to tease Daryl, and tickled the little stripe of hair under the others belly button. “Not that I mind.”  
“Good, ‘cause I ain’t shavin’.” Daryl said, knowing he wasn’t very fair, but he just prefered Ryan without much body hairs. Ryan wasn’t offended by it at all, and actually was able to laugh about it. “I’m curious how you’d look without hairs.” Ryan had spoken, making Daryl raise his eyebrow.  
“Ya wanna see me bald?” He asked, and stroked through his hair, on his head.  
“Not bald like… head hair bald, but body hair.” Ryan nodded, and stroked the others slight chest hair too. “But I am only curious, I don’t need to see it, you know.”  
The small talk continued for a bit, before they heard a knock on their door. “Guys. I can hear you talking. We are going to build further… Wanna come out too?” Carol’s voice spoke from outside the room. She knew better than to come in without any form of permission. “Yeah.” Ryan said, but didn’t look up from Daryl. “I’ll be downstairs soon. Give me a moment. I don’t know about Daryl though.” Ryan spoke, and stroked Daryl’s hair a bit more and leaned in to kiss him, before getting off the other, to the side of the bed, and put on the prosthesis on, before going out of the room, not really caring if Carol saw him in his underwear or not. “Morning.” Ryan said friendly to the grey haired woman, and went to the bathroom, to freshen up a bit.  
Carol however blinked twice at the sight, and looked back into the bedroom, seeing Daryl in his underwear as well. It caused her to smile and gave a quick nod, before going back downstairs.  
Daryl had a slight blush on his face as Carol had seen them both in their underwears, but shrugged it off and went to the bathroom as well, freshening up for another day of hard work.


End file.
